Weird things an' no sleep

Well shoot, I don't know what way to turn. I ain't been to bed since night before last. An that was at 3am in the morn'n...what I calls night 'cause it's still dark outside at 3am. If'n it's dark, it's night time. Simple as that. An' don't let nobody tell ya any different. I been around a long time an' I know the difference between day time an' night time. Sheesh!!!

Speak'n of be'n around a long time, at 73 year old, shit happens. I ain't been do'n worth a crap for a week now. Night before last, I was waked up bout 3 times with these weird things go'n on. Don't know how to 'splain weird things, but I was think'n "this is it Margaret". Then yesterday, I didn't feel worth a poop. Dizzy spells an' stuff like that....weak like a wet noodle. Blood pressure just a tad high at bout 160/80....what I fix up with a big ol' aspirin an' a blood pressure pill. Took me a hour nap. After supper, I feeled weird again. Let's try another one hour nap....for bout two hours or so. My god, it's 9 a clock pm.

Well shoot, if'n I ain't sleepy, may as well work on the Alice project. Do you have any idea how long it takes to build the windshield section of the front cap?

 Ok, let me 'splain something to ya. It ain't right. I breaked out the calculator an' did me some measurements an' calculations. Alice is too skinny wide. Her width is 1:24 scale an' her length is 1:21 scale. That's right at a half inch too narrow.  That means cut'n both caps an' the floor in half an' add'n that miss'n half inch.
Do I fix it or do I not?

My god, it's 3am. An' I still ain't a bit sleepy. So's I make me a pot of Community coffee....strong stuff. Did me some sweep'n of the floors an' a bit of housework. Then the sun come up. Yee ha, it day time. Now what we gonna do???

After a hot day yesterday, it's up to 69 degs today. Even had us some rain before day time.

Damn, I need me a nap......laters!!!

"Are you sure you wanna do this"???

From time to time I ask myself...."are you sure you wanna do this"? This can be applied to most anything I "modify" or take a hanker'n to build. Some things I modify or build, there is absolutely no good reason in the world that I would do so. Remove perfectly good carpet an' replace it with dark walnut flooring. Then cover up part of the flooring with cheap vinyl flooring. Remove a perfectly good oak table an' replace it with a desktop made out of old pallets. Remove a seldom used couch an' replace it with a very very comfortable recliner. Installing shelves in closets where most people hang clothes. These were all "comfort" items. Nobody needs that much comfort.

Then there's the "I can build this" side of me. An' to prove my point, I jump in hand an' foot. Have ya ever created a piece of art out of a old 3 wheel golf'n cart?

 I never in my lifetime had ever drawed up plans for a porch an' builded it to plan. In Deming, New Mexico, I did just that. It served me well an' still stands to this day. God I loved "da porch".

Then there's my model build'n. It's a hobby ya know, so costs are not a issue. Kind of like catch'n "free" fish....cost is no issue.
The sternwheeler "Chaperon" was the first expensive model boat I ever builded. You wouldn't believe it if'n I tole ya. It was a kit....all parts laser cut. All wood construction. One year from start, it is still not completed.

I've always wanted a tug boat. The closest I could come, was a model. Also expensive as far as models go. It is a kit. Made of ABS an' PVC plastic. I completed this sucker in right bout 3 months. Too easy of a build.
See header photo.....ain't she beautiful?

Now I got the hair to build a model of "Alice", my first motorhome. Why I don't know. See above...."are you sure you wanna do this"? There are no model kits to build a motorhome. This is a scratch build. Without any plans or measurements. Boy howdy, I sure am glad I passed math in skool (millimeters, centimeters, inches....calculator an' rulers). Damn, I should'a been a engineer. All I have is photos to go by. I ain't never done nuttin like this before, an' I ain't sure I want to ever do it again. Ya see, stuff ain't fit'n right. It don't look right....but I took care most that stuff.

As promised to George last night, here is a photo of the "ivory" painted rear cap an' the beginning of the front cap.

On more than one occasion....bout 4 or 7, I measured the Alice model to see if'n it would fit in the trash can.
 
Oh, did I mention I know how to build airplanes also? Damn thing ain't see no sky yet after all these years (built 2004). But I still got it, stored in the basement compartments.

 "One day airplane, I'm gonna fly you".

I bought a freak'n pie. Marie Callenders Dutch Apple Pie. Well let me tell ya bout this pie.....it sucks. I throwed it in the oven just like the instructions said....put the crumbles on, baked some more. Then I let it cool. Damn, that's a good look'n pie. I cut into it. What the hell???.....it's apple soup. All runny an' stuff. There ain't no such thing as "apple soup". Well, there is at Billy Bob's house. But it tastes pretty good. Sometimes Walmart pisses me off. Where the hell is Mrs Smiths apple pie?

Peanuts, motorhomes an' bulldozers....what a combination

Todays post, I will try to keep to a minimum of bout 3 or 4 subjects. You already know what one of 'em is, but you'll never guess what we gonna talk bout today.

Peanuts, we gonna talk bout peanuts. We all know peanuts grow underground, right? Bugs, worms an' microscopic stuff crawl'n round on 'em. For this reason an' this reason along, there are people that refuse to eat a peanut, no matter how healthy they are. These same people will place a huge help'n of mashed taters on their plate. They eat onions an' carrots. Now me, I love peanuts. I'll eat the shit out them.
I got off track there for a second. While shop'n at Walmart, I spied these bags of  "Salted Jumbo Virginia" peanuts. I got me a bag them peanuts, think'n I was gonna be in hog heaven eat'n these things. WRONG!!! Peanuts from Virginia are "yankee" peanuts. They ain't got no taste an' they didn't roast 'em long enough. Half raw. Tastes like balsa wood....or something like that.
So's, ya know what I did to some them peanuts? Ya see, I had me half a pizza on the Weber grill....watch'n that thing very closely ya know so's it don't burn up. After removal of the pizza, I placed a great big handfull of them peanuts on the grill. I'm gonna roast these suckers. Well shoot, I forgit my peanuts are on the grill....burn them suckers slap up. More are added after removal of blackened peanuts. A taste test was done. My god, these are Virginia peanuts. There is no hope for 'em. Dumpster come to mind.

The "Alice project". I just don't know bout this project. Along the coast of Texas, we have a humidity problem. Stuff warps. Much of Alice is be'n builded out of a highly compressed paper product. It's almost a 1/8th inche thick an' strong like bull. Hard to cut with the sharpest of hobby cut'n tools. Exacto an' utility knifes. But, it absorbs humidity an' that means it's gonna warp. Now I ain't talk'n a great big ol' warp, I'm talk'n a tiny warp. I can see it, but you cain't. Construction will continue.

Ok, I went to Hobby Lobby again yesterday. Bought me up a whole bunch of stuff. Shoot, I could build 10 motorhomes now. Anyhows, at Walmart, I fount me a can of "satin" ivory paint. It's not a perfect match to what color was on Alice, but again, you will never know. I'm git excitis.

The rear cap was primed with grey primer yesterday. Then sanded. This is gonna work. One more coat an' it's ready for ivory paint. May be on the agenda for today.

The front cap has been started. Now you talk bout some weird angles an' stuff like that, the front cap is gonna take some time. Here what it looks like today.

An' this is what it's supposed to look like.

Well shoot, I'm think'n 2 subjects for today will be just fine. Not much to talk bout, but that's all I got.

Oh no, wait a minute. That neighbor guy fired up the bulldozer sometime last night an' he run slap over me lay'n in my bed. Now I can hardly move around. But, even with the bulldozer issue, my back still feels better than it did 6 months ago.

Now I got to Google "how to replace a ignition switch in a Jeep". I know from experience with "Sally da house", this is gonna be a back break'n chore. Grrrrrrrr..........

Forgotten dreams an' a 4 hour spare tire cover....just for starters

Bet ya a dollar ya ain't never gonna guess what we gonna talk bout today. Nope, you lost that dollar, we ain't gonna talk bout world events or politics.

But....I will touch on the subject of "what Billy Bob does ever day". And in some cases "why". Ya see, when ya ain't got nobody to talk to, the damn dog just sits there staring at ya, you begin to talk to yourself. An' ya answer back. All the while, your mind is aglow with weird shit to discuss.

RV shelter came to mind again last night. We talked bout it for a good hour. Me an' me was do'n the talk'n, while Sadie Mae sit over there staring at me. Now I was think'n I had given up on the construction of a RV shelter, but it seems it is still alive back there in the deteriorating brain cells. Dreams are amazing ain't they? This IS a 10 year dream ya know. Now where the hell does a retired old fart build a RV shelter? By the way, don't be bet'n your entire check on it.

For those that are new to Billy Bob's Place, here's what I'm talk'n bout.

Wouldn't that look good sit'n on 5 acres with a little stream run'n through an' a pond full of fishes.

Ha, you talk bout build'n stuff.....I do that ya know, I spended a good 4 hours build'n a spare tire cover an' mak'n that bumper fit.

We at the point of a fresh coat of primer on that rear cap....what ya think? Damn, I'm already get'n all excitis.
"Tail lights Billy Bob, ya gotta have tail lights". 

On top of that 4 hours, much time was spent on try'n to hold this thing together while I'm build'n stuff. I was cuss'n 3 different kinds of tape....in 3 different languages, all of which don't hold. Duck tape is supposed to hold anything. Ha ha, guess again. The reason behind not glue'n this sucker together, is that there is paneling an' cabinets yet to be installed inside. The sides need to be painted before the winder glass, paneling an' cabinets can be installed. Completed, the roof will be removable so's I can play house in there.

Oh, did I mention....carpeting has been installed. Used a old khaki (spell checker) colored shirt material. Looks pretty good if'n I do say so myself.    

I ain't gonna tell ya how many times I reverted to a "full out" cuss'n cession cut'n an' sand'n this thing. Cuss'n fixes stuff ya know. In my book, anybody what don't know how to cuss....needs some therapy. An' that statement reminds me the time....my son Ronnie, in a heated discussion, said a "BIG" cuss'n word to DIL Gina. She calls the doctor office an' set up a therapy appointment for for her an' Ronnie the next day.  She left the office all piss off an' "cuss'n" after the doctor was finished with her. Ronnie grin'n ear to ear. So ya see, by doctors orders, ya gotta cuss a bit.

I don't know how warm it was at your house yesterday, but the old Billy Bob had to crank up a air conditioner. It was frick'n hot in "da house". Outside temp on my Walmart special showed 87 degs.

Then later in the even'n, I was sit'n here an' got to think'n...."it's close to 1am, let's go to bed". Well it weren't 1am like I was think'n. It was go'n on to 4am. Dad gum television an' PBS!!! Why they wait till after midnight to show the good stuff? Sheesh!!!!...two hours of Thomas Edison an' his light bub.

Have ya ever mix spinach an' maters together? I invented that many years ago. It's delicious. We gonna eat fried balony from the deli, cut 1/4 inches thick. The spinach mater concoction. A'n a big ol pile of half fried taters. I dreamed bout that meal all day long....droplets of spit run'n down my chin. Oh my god, somebody breaked into my house. They stealed my last can of spinach....it ain't nowheres to be found. Well hell, let's use french cut green beans instead. Now green beans don't taste anything nuttin like spinach, but let me tell ya right now, I'll be use'n green beans again. My supper last night was [this] close to perfect. Just ask Sadie Mae, she'll tell ya. Sadie Mae always gets a sample of what ever I am eat'n.
Hmmmmm.....fried balony an' egg omelet sure do sound good for lunch.  

Ok, I rekon todays "short" post is turned into another long one. That's a sign of a active mind....or something like that.  

Alice is mak'n progress. My mind is go'n down hill. The weather is beautiful.

Well shoot folks, here it is another day an' we ain't got nuttin new to talk bout. When this happens, what is quite often these days, I "git to think'n".

For quite some time now, I been think'n bout....what is in store for the old Billy Bob in his later years? Well, ya all know what I been do'n to "Sally da house" to make myself more comfortable. A very comfortable number bed with a 2 1/2 inches memory topper, the addition of "that chair" (recliner) sit'n over there. Can goods moved to a reasonable height in a closet off'n the floor, easy to get to (used to be under the discarded uncomfortable couch). The removal of a house full of carpeting. God I hate vacuum cleaners. A new desktop that serves as a computer station, a coffee table (sip up a cup ya know) a place to store paperwork, my meds  an' every day stuff (toss it here). A hobby table, an' a reachable area to place tools what need put up....stuff like that. My god, you wouldn't believe the stuff I got on my desktop.
I find it rather hard to find any more comfort than what I got right now. Although, I would love to be the owner of a electric awning. Just push a button.....pooof, it's out. Push it again....pooof, it's in. Now that's what I'm talk'n bout.....that's comfort.  

 Photo posted just so's ya don't think I was tell'n ya a little white lie bout this desktop. An' I had just cleaned that sucker off yesterday morn'n.
But anyhows, I'm think'n there's a great possibility my travel days are com'n to a close. It ain't that I don't like to travel, what I do like very much. In my 12 years of liv'n in a motorhome an' scoot''n back an' forth across the US....something like bout 80,000 to 100,000 miles, I've seen just bout all I want to see. The desire is slowly fad'n away. Hmmmmm, maybe I should retire an' "do nuttin".
But....it's winter time, right? Everbody thinks like this in the winter. Come back in a few months an' see what I think then.

Now.....who says the the old Billy Bob cain't build end caps an' bumpers. Take a lookie here.

Man boy howdy, you talk bout a task, this was one. And this is just the rear end cap. Spended a whole bunch of hours on that sucker. Wait till I start on the front end cap. Yikes, that gonna be a chore. Probly gonna cuss a couple times.
Take a look see at that bumper I builded. I'm think'n that bumper is [this] close to perfect....look's just like a real bumper. Note: New motorhomes don't have bumpers. Ya run into something, it gonna cost ya way more than a hunnert doller bill. The rear cap an' bumper are not finished yet, but get'n close. Much more measures, cut'n, grind'n, fit'n an' sand'n.

Nothing is git'n glued together at this point. All I can do is build parts an' set 'em off to the side for later installation. Ya see, I got to do some exterior paint'n to do before I install some items. Like winders, interior walls, dash board, seats.....a kitchen sink an' work'n commode. Yes there will be a A/C on the roof. An' vents....stuff like that. My god, I gonna be on this project for the next two or three years......more like 6 to 8 months at this rate.  
 
Ok, back to that Weber grill I mentioned yesterday. It's a wonderful grill an' every camper should invest in one. If'n ya ain't a camper, get one anyhows. But, I have a problem with temp control on mine. The temp don't go low enough. My low setting runs right at 325 to 350 degs.....way too hot to grill chicken. I took me a close look see at the regulator. There is no adjustment. Now, be'n that I'm the old Billy Bob fix it guy, I got me a bright idea. A adjustable burner orifice like the old cook stoves in the kitchen. Will it fit?? Hell, I don't know. Will it work?? Well yeah....if'n it will fit.

As much as I hate it, I got to make me a trip to Walmart. Meds ya know an' pick up a few needed/wanted items. Shoot over to Hobby Lobby an' pick me up some hobby stuff. A trip to the auto parts to match some tan paint for Alice. Oh, while I think of it, does anybody know how to remove the gloss from gloss paint. "Alice" didn't shine like a brand spank'n new motorhome. She was dull....like most motorhomes are.

Ok, I done went too far with todays post....talk too much. I got things to do.
Laters......... 

Monday....again?

Well shoot, it's another Monday. Back when I worked for a liv', I weren't all too happy to see a new week start up after a excit'n weekend. But, for the last 12 years of retirement, a new week starts every day.

Yesterdays mention of of my son Robert didn't come out the way I was expect'n. I sure don't like to get all beat up 'cause I kind of sorta like my #1 son. He's the oldest of my 7 kids, so that makes him first (#1)....no mention of "favorite". We got that straight now.....OK?
 But.....could Robert be my favorite out of a whole pile of kids? Well yeah, there's that possibility. Same thing goes with grankids. I have a couple favorites, but I ain't gonna tell ya who they are....or why they are.

I ain't gonna say a bunch bout this "Alice" motorhome project, but I'm gonna tell ya right now, this is gonna be one drawed out project. An' then when it's done, it has absolutely no use at all.

My god, I work on this thing a whole bunch of hours yesterday an' this is all I got.

Ya may notice I am install'n interior walls. See the built in refrigerator in that not yet completed wall?
The entire interior will receive panel'n the same as that little wall. Carpet on the floor? You betcha. I like that. Just like the real Alice.
Ha, doll houses come to mind. 

Much thought has gone into how I'm gonna construct the front end an' the back end. In motorhome talk, they are called front an' back caps. Made out of fiberglass in a mold. Well, I ain't got no mold an' ya know what that means...I got me some intricate work ahead of me.

 This is what I'm talk'n bout. Have ya ever build a set of chrome bumpers out of wood??

Holy crap, I waked up to a hot "inside Sally da house" this morn'n. Ya see, when I finally got out "that chair" at right bout 3am last night, I forgot to turn the heaters down when I headed off to bed. I swear, I love this weather.

Now, bout supper last night. Me an' this Weber grill is gonna have a go around. Ya see, I defrosted a couple pork steaks for supper....an' a baked tater. I fire up the grill on high so's I can get me some char. Ya gotta love char. Anyhows, the pork steaks was over cooked (dry). An' that baked tater.....it was like mush. But the corn I heated up on the stove was perfect. A very good meal if'n I do say so myself.
Speak'n of the Weber grill. George grills his chicken bout two hours "low an' slow" an' it comes out perfect. I grill my chicken bout 30 minutes an' it come out "on fire"....black. 

Ok, gonna cut this short.....I got things to do. Ha ha....warsh some dishes. Sweep the floor. Take the trash out before I git maggots.    



  

Alice don't look right

See what I tole you? Yesterday sucked.

It all started off with a bunch of  "cry'n in yer beer" stuff. Then it turned into a bunch of weird back, chest, shoulder, leg cramp, right foot, cain't breath pains. I'm tell'n ya, I was think'n "this is it Margaret". A second mug of strong coffee fix all that stuff up in nuttin flat. Along with a couple Advils, Spiriva, pain'n reliev'n cream....an' a lay down for a bit.

Ok, let's build that motorhome this morn'n. Sheesh, nuttin is fit'n right. I got to make some changes. The thought of "dumpster" entered my mind.

You all know that I had cut the sides out before I knowed what size to cut 'em....right? Something bout these sides just don't look right from what I remember Alice look'n like. Four hours was spent go'n through old photos an' copyed to a folder on the desktop (computer desktop) for easy access. What the hell??? The windshield is the wrong size. The liv'n room winder is the wrong size. (They ain't no more, all fixed.) The length don't look right. The height don't look right. Measurements are took. It's right. So why the hell don't it look right. Oh wait, not it ain't right. Modifications are in order for the height.  Just that 3/16th inch is gonna take over a hour to fix.

The engine has been assembled an' painted black. The frame was painted black at the same time. Damn, it looks just like a Peterbuilt 18 wheeler. The floor has been added to the frame with super glue......unpainted. "It's got to be painted Billy Bob". It needs to come back off for a paint job. Grrrrrrrr.....to super glue. I cutted my dad gum thumb ya know....tak'n super glued parts apart. Grrrrrrrr...to super sharp cut'n instruments.

I attempted to sleep in "that chair" (recliner) last night. Ya see, at this point in my life, I hate sleep'n in that dad gum bed. Ain't say'n it ain't comfortable or nuttin like that. It's just ever time I go to bed, my mind goes off to a wondering world of total BS. That could be one more reason I stay up so late ever night. That an' the damn TV.

Today's post was gonna be a letter to my son Robert. But....after think'n on it for a hour or so, it would take me a week to write him a letter. Of my 7 kids, Robert is #1. #1 in be'n he was my first born. Any time his daddy has a problem, he is there. Any time I need assistance fix'n stuff, he is there. Any time I am down, the sound of his voice lifts me up. That's my son. I love you Robert. Now all you other kids, I'm gonna take ya out behind the barn an' we gonna have a talk.

My goodness, two days in a row of perfect weather. I know there is still more to come of that dad gum freez'n cold weather, but I'm gonna enjoy all this warmth that I can. I ain't no freak'n Eskimo from Alaska ya know. Do Eskimos live in Alaska????

Oh, before I forgit, I was prepar'n to warsh dishes at 2:30am last night. Loaded up the dish pan, put me some Dawn in there an' fill 'er up with hot water. Piss on them dishes.

Ok, I got things to do. Laters.....

It's a build....we gonna build a motorhome

Man boy howdy, what the hell is go'n on? It was 5:30 this morn'n before I headed off to bed. Then I couldn't go to sleep. I'm think'n today is gonna be a very depressing day.

If you are uninterested in hear'n bout "how to build a motorhome", I suggest you stop read'n right now. This is what I'm do'n an' I'm gonna talk bout it. 

It was cold when I jump in the "billy jeep". I'm go'n to Hobbly Lobby. Go take a look see ya know. I spend $57 on stuff. Stuff to build a model, from scratch, of my first motorhome "Alice". Named by "first mate" Vickie Lynn. Man boy howdy, I could tell ya some stories bout this girl.
Anyways, I bought a truck. The wheels an' tires will determine the scale I will use for the Alice build. It turns out to be 1:25 scale....give or take. Just a tad under the original thought of "18 inches would be a perfect length" (17 1/2 inches)....give or take.

Now build'n the sides for a motorhome ain't so bad. Ya see, motorhomes have flat sides. With the new construction material, the two sides have been....calculated, measured an' cut out. Wheels an' tires were assembled, the truck frame modified for motorhome use an' I'm happy like a lark with the results. "Ya gotta paint the frame Billy Bob". Pics later of a painted frame.

Now, we have some problems. Us'n a 18 wheeler truck in this construction project, some items will not be the same as what was on Alice. Like the motor. Alice had a Chevy 454 V-8 motor an' a Peterbuilt has a 6 cylinder diesel engine. The only reason I'm gonna install a diesel engine in this project is so's I can hook up the drive shaft. But, you will never see that it's not a Chevy 454 V-8. Shoot, I've always wanted a diesel powered motorhome anyhows....now I gonna have one. Pics of the engine later.

Now, there is the possibility I will drop off of the Alice project today an' warsh some dishes an' sweep the dad gum floor again. But I ain't gonna bet a weeks salary on that silly idea. The tug boat is sit'n over there want'n the rigging replaced with string what looks more like rope.  That's a possibility too. Be'n retired, I have many many choices to make myself happy.

Oh my god, let me tell ya bout some smoke. I grill cook my pizza ya know, an' ya gotta watch it very closely so's it don't catch afire. Anyhows, I was sit'n here work'n on the above mentioned project, an' I says....."Oh crap, that pizza been on the grill for 45 minutes. I open the door an' "my god, my Weber grill is on fire"....smok'n like a sun-a-gun. The other half of that pizza was removed from the freezer an' placed on the grill. For no more than 15 minutes. It come out perfect (Eat yer heart out Pizza Hut). Sadie Mae just loves slap burned up pizza.

It's a beautiful day here in south Texas. The cold front has passed an' we look'n at some nice temps for bout a week. I mean, what's not to like bout 70 deg tamps, sunshine an' slight breezes? I got me some winders slid open an' the door latched wide open. Cain't beat this with a stik.
I'm think'n I can smell a golf'n game right around the corner.  



    
 

Update: We have wheels an' tires.......It's a motorhome.....yeee ha!!!

Well shoot, another week shot to hell an' gone. I ain't talk'n bout fun things, I'm talk'n bout clean'n this damn house to look like somebody actually lives in it. 

Just to give ya a idea, the other day, I grabs holt to the broom. I'm gonna sweep an' mop these dad gum dirty floors (mud an' little bitty pieces of grass....Sadie Mae hairs). Do ya know how big a hallway is in a motorhome? That was it, that's what I sweeped.
An' them dishes in the sink. I turn the water heater on, we gonna warsh dishes. Squirt some soap in there an' fill up the dish pan. It's still sit'n there this morn'n.
My desktop....I cain't find it. I know it's there 'cause all this stuff ain't lay'n on the floor.

Ok, I'm up to bout 25 hours of research try'n to find me some wheels an' tires. Now if'n you was to consider how much a big corporation pays some dude to do this, I am up to bout $800 hunnert dollars. There are no wheels an' tires on the internet that will match the wheels an' tires "Alice" had. We look'n at great big ol' 18 wheeler wheels an' tires.

The entire build of the "Alice" project will depend on the diameter of the wheels an' tires I find. So I'm sit'n here twiddl'n my dad gum fingers an' toes.....wait'n. Ya see, I was think'n 18 inches would be a perfect length for a motorhome. That figgers out to a 1:18th scale (1 foot equals 18 feet). Ok, we got that straight...right? That works out to a set of 1 5/8 inches diameter tires just to be close.
Ok, let's forget them tires right now. A couple places in Corpus Christi may have just what I'm look'n for. But I ain't go'n to Corpus Christi today. It's too damn cold outside.....sheesh!!!

I breaked out the printer yesterday an' printed bout a gazillion prints of Alice photos. I ended up with a 1:20 scale print for a template. That's right at 16 inch in length. Measurements was took an' redrawed....I cut that sucker out. "Hey, that looks like "Alice"". As a trial, to see if'n this foam board is gonna work for walls, I cut out the passenger side.

 Well shoot, that ain't right. The back end needs to be extended a bit. I'm think'n I can do that.
I also noticed the back winder is not the correct size. Gotta fix that too.

Ok, we git'n close. That blob ya see up there on the dashboard is a sleep'n Sadie Mae. She's such a good girl. Worthless, but a good girl.

Not much discussion on the freak'n weather this morn'n....it sucks. I 'member a time, I lived in Galveston, Texas. In the winter time, we wore shorts an' tees most all the time. Well, it did get a bit nippy in Jan an' Feb.
This was before global warming, so how comes it was perfect weather? An' Galveston is NOT south Texas. Shit'n ass people make stuff up just so's they can reap the $$$$$$$$$$$$$. Boy howdy I betcha a dollar them people was shit'n in their pants when the ice burgs melted up there in north Texas.
Ok, that should cause a stir amungest the believers. "The old Billy Bob has lost his mind". I'm grin'n ya know.

Ok, it's afternoon already. I got to do something even if'n it ain't right. Now where the hell did I leave the broom? Laters....
**********************************************************

Update....ha ha ha, I am the owner of wheels an' tires.

I was sit'n here an' I got to think'n, maybe Hobby Lobby has some them big trucks they got on their website. So's I jumps in the "billy jeep" an' head down the road a piece, bout half ways to Corpus Christi. "MY GOD, Hobby Lobby has got everthing". More construction materials was placed in the cart. Some new hobby blades. An' a 1:25th scale Perterbuilt 359 18 wheeler tractor.

It were but a couple minutes after return'n to "da house", I breaked out them wheels an' tires. Hope they fit.

I'm think'n they gonna work put just fine. But....what do I know bout build a motorhome?
 
  

Billy Bob's house is closed today.....reopen tomorrow

There will be no post today from Billy Bob's house. Ya see, I don't feel like talk'n, an' when I don't feel like talk'n, I ain't gonna talk. Simple as that.

Although.........
Yesterday, me an' the OFM Barney did us some awesome golf ball swak'n. Well, it weren't really all that awesome, but we was swak'n hell out them golf'n balls.

I cain't find no tires an' wheels on the internet. I done spent $2.35 on the "Alice" project, so I need tires an' wheels. An' I don't feel like driv'n all the way to Corpus Christi to Toys R Us.

Ok.....laters

Google, you suck

Wow boy howdy, Google sure is beat'n up on some of us bloggers. I did notice my yesterday's post was finally updated some time this morn'n. As of midnight last night it wasn't.

I got myself so worked up, I went to Port Aransas. I was in need of gas, some smokes an' pick up my mail. An' Sadie Mae was tickle pink....bark'n at sea gulls an' stuff like that. Gasoline in Aransas Pass was $1.85. Cleaned out both liquor stores of their supply of Clipper light little cigars. Got me a 5 pound bag full of mail.

In the mail was a registration reminder that "it's time". So's I go down to city hall an' I get me the registration for the "billy jeep". I'm good for another year. Don't seem like I've owned this Jeep for a year does it?

Then it was a quick stop at Walmart on the return home. Aransas Pass has a nice Walmart. I never cuss one time.  Well I want you lookie here....a clock. I throws it in the cart. Ya see, the clock I now have, stops run'n any ol' time it wants. I have no freak'n idea what time it is. We gonna give this'un a try.

Anyhows, I heads off to the office/school supply section. I'm look'n for some material to build a "Alice". The thin plastic sheet are too thin. I didn't get any. But I did buy me up a big ol' piece of 20 by 30 foam board. I've used it before an' it's some wonderful stuff. This will be perfect for the sides, top an' bottom. An' it's cheap as hell. Note: Back at "da house" I got to think'n, this foam board will dent an' scratch rather easy....it needs a harder surface. The too thin plastic stuff glued to the foam board would be perfect as a covering.

Off to the arts an' crafts section. Yup, hang'n right there on the wall is some white an' black stretch beading cord. Perfect size for the rigging on the tug boat. I buy one of each.

Home at last. I got to sit myself down an' take up some Advil.....no, think'n it was two aspirin. Then I got all excitis bout that stretch cord. It's not the color I want it. I mix up some very thin acrylic paint an' I dye that cord a dark tan. Not what I was want'n, but I ain't go'n back to Walmart. One piece of rigging rope was installed.....nice, I like that.

That was my yesterday. A successful day. Hope today is as good or better. Did I mention I had the A/C cranked up yesterday afternoon. Ya see, the wind blowed my door shut while I was off run'n the streets. It was very very hot in "da house" when I returned.

Ok, I got a golf'n game with the OFM Barney to prepare for. Today's game ain't gonna be nuttin like our last game. I'm gonna play in the fareway, not the woods. May even try that new Cobra driver what ain't been used in bout a year.   

Testing....1, 2, 3

Ok, my god, it's late already. Now I don't know bout anybody else, but I git out of bed any damn time I want to. It was 9:15. An' I had to pee. End of story....be yourself.

I could sit here an' give a detailed description of yesterdays golf'n game with the OFM Barney, but I ain't gonna. It was just a game. Poor scores, lost balls in the little ponds that ya couldn't hit if you was try'n to, an' in the weeds in the out of bounds areas. But it was a perfect day.

But I will tell ya bout a mud bath. Ya see, Barney struck a ball into a area most playes never hit a golf ball. A little ditch what last week was full of water. Barney rares back an' he swak hell out that golf ball.....KAPOOWIE....it go bout 30 yards. Chunks of grass an' mud go fly'n in ever direction. Mostly in the golf cart I'm sit'n in. Me, Barney an' the golf'n cart are covered with a mixture of that mud an' grass.....an' we got us a golf game to finish. All cleaned up, we proceed.

After a long round of golf ball swak'n, bout 4 1/2 hour or so, I was get'n rather on the hungry side. Stomach grow'n up a storm, like a pit bull dog. I got me a #3 on my mind. Enchilada with the best enchilada sauce ya ever tasted, a big ol' taco what would make Taco Bell cringe in despair, one the bestest tostadas I ever taste in my life an' piles of refried beans an' rice. Ya don't go away hungry when ya eat a #3. Then we sit outside an' talk for bout a hour.....normal old fats talk.

While I'm in town, I may as well run down to the auto parts sell'n place an' buy me up some 'friction modifier'. Ha, the auto parts guy knowed exactly what I was talk'n bout.  Ya see, all that noise back there in the "billy jeep", that we attempted to fix in Georgia, is still there. Google is your best friend. Friction modifier is required in a Jeeps rear end. Something to do with "limited slip" differentials. Anyhows, nephew Joseph put that stuff in the rear end. Now all I got to do is drive it....then pray it works to fix the noise. Fingers crossed.

It's OK for men to be depressed. Now "macho" men don't get depressed, they are just "hav'n a bad day". I ain't so much a macho guy, so I get depressed ever once in a while. Today is one them days.....I'm "hav'n me a bad day". I got way too much stuff go'n through my mind that I cain't think of the better things in life. I'm think'n long the lines...."What the hell am I gonna do tomorrow"? Travels. Projects. Health issues. That's what I'm talk'n bout. I have no plans.

Well wait a minute, yes I do have a plan. An' that is to head back up to the golf ball swak'n place tomorrow an' beat hell out of Barney. Now keep in mind, I'm a hunnert year older than Barney, so he has a great advantage over me. You would think he would spot me a few strokes to even the game out, but that ain't the way Barney plays golf. By the way, that ain't the way I play neither. Either ya got it or ya ain't.

For Gypsy. Yes I did cuss yesterday when I went out to start the "billy jeep". You should have heard me. But, it finally started an' I weren't late. Think'n I need to do me some Google research.

Ok, I got to do something. Git out "da house". Fresh air an' sunshine. Don't ya just love it?

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Grrrrrrr Google, ya piss me off.....

Third attempt......Grrrrrrr...........

4th attempt,,,,,,,

Ok, here it is 19 hours later an' my blog still has not updated to today's post. Now I'm not talk'n bout it not being there, 'cause it is. But on all the bloggers that have "Billy Bob's Place on blogs they follow, it don't update.

But my blog is not the only blog do'n that. A while back, OFM's blogs did the same thing. Today, Dizzy Dick's blog does the same thing. It's like he didn't post a blog today.

So, here is a test I'm gonna do. No title....an' see what Google Blog Spot dot com will do bout that.

Ok, that didn't work neither. One more thing I'm gonna try.......

A busy day....kind of sorta

I'm sit'n there paint'n a flag pole. I hear a knock knock knock. What the hell, ain't nobody knocks on Billy Bob's door.

Yesterday night, I was feel'n kind of strange. Hot flashes an' stuff. Vision not quite right. I grab holt to my wrist an' check my pulse. It's play'n "Skip a Beat".

Now how comes this??? I got to think'n. Earlier, my lower back was hurt'n something terrible. I grabs holt to the Advil bottle. No wait, let's take a couple aspirin. No wait, I got some them Tylenol 3's left. I take one.
Think'n back, the last time I took Tylenol 3, I'm think'n I was listen'n to "Skip a Beat". I will NOT be tak'n no more Tylenol 3's.

To my surprise, there stands the OFM Barney with a great big ol' grin on his face. I help him in "da house" an' sit him down. We had us a usual "old folks" golf ball swak'n talk. Along with anything else what crossed our minds....aches an' pains, travel ideas, weather conditions.....you know what I'm talk'n bout.

Nephew Joseph come out to "da house" an' says...."I need your assistance uncle Bill". Ha, it was up under the mobile....string'n out sewer drain lines. Ya see, he was chang'n out a busted bath tub/shower assembly with a high dollar brand spank'n new one. In nuttin flat I was cut'n pipe an' glue'n that stuff together. Damn I work fast....an' that's one good look'n job well done.

Me an' the OFM Barney is gonna meet up at the golf'n place this morn'n. Eat us up some that fine Mexican food after a excit'n round of swak'n golf balls.

I forced my way out of bed to the coffee pot. My god, I think I'm gonna die. Bout 5 hours sleep last night an' my back hurt something fierce.

Bout that no sleep situation. Ya see, I been hav'n a hell of a time find'n parts for the "Alice" build. I freak'n dreamed bout that shit....keep me awake. An' I ain't even decided if'n I'm gonna build the thing or not. We'll be tak'n a break on any new projects until I get me a good nights sleep.

I came [this] close to call'n Barney an' cancel our golf game this morn'n. But that ain't the way I work. I'm gonna swak that golf'n ball so far it gonna take a week to find it. Boy howdy, I sure do hope the "billy jeep" will crank up this morn'n.

Ya see, with the ignition problem I had on "Sally da house" not long ago, I'm now hav'n the same problem.....or I think it is, with start'n the "billy jeep". My god, how do ya change a ignition switch in a freak'n Jeep?

Ok, I got to get ready for a important appointment. I'm gonna try to whoop the OFM, but that's unlikely. He practices. I don't.

See ya laters............... 

Are ya confused yet?

Ok, so what's the problem? How fast is a hunnert mile a hour? In Billy Bob's world, that can be anywheres between 30 mph all the ways up to 65 mph. What's so hard to understand bout that? Same thing goes for time.
I know that's gonna confuse somebody, but that's the best I can 'splain it.

Yesterday, hobby tools, boxes of hobby materials, stray parts, cans of paint....stuff like that, was sorted an' will be placed in the hall closet sometimes in the next few days. I can see my desktop again, an' underneath, I now have room for my feet.

In case ya missed yesterdays post....thanks a lot Google, here is what I was talk'n bout.....
 *cut an' paste*
 Think'n bout this "build Alice" project, I got myself just a bit on the excitis side.

Now let me 'splain something to ya bout the "Alice" project. There is no such thing as a model motorhome kit to purchase from a hobby shop....or nuttin like that. It has to be a "scratch" build. No measurements, no instructions to follow...no nuttin. Nuttin but a few photos of Alice on my computer. With a printer, I can print out them photos to any size I want. Take some measurements off'n them prints an' build me a motorhome. I should'a been a engineer. Now if'n I have me some programs like old Dizzy Dick has got, I could let the computer do all the work. Hint hint.   

So how was the weather yesterday? Boy howdy hot damn, it was a beautiful day. Afternoon temp got up to 82 degs for a couple 4 or 5 hours or so. I had winders opened up for fresh air an' Sadie Mae was in an' out through the open door a hunnert times. This is south Texas weather like it should be. Today is a remake of yesterday. Although it ain't gonna last.

Same with gas prices.....it ain't gonna last. Ya see, with all these low gas prices, somebody is lose'n a ton of pocket change ($$$$$). Sheesh, I'm think'n bout $5 a gallon in the near future. Just to make up for the lost pocket change ya know. The state of California is already talk'n bout rais'n the tax on a gallon of gas.

To bed at 4am last night. Dang, something ain't right.

Well shoot, I ain't got nuttin else to talk bout today. This ain't normal.  






 

Do I or don't I.....build a Alice

Yikes boy howdy, did I sleep or did I sleep? Some closed eye time was spent yesterday, but at no time did I have me a restful nap. The mind was filled with visions of a new project.
But anyhows, at 1:30am I hit the sack think'n...."if I can only git me 6 hours of restful sleep, Saturday will be a good day". The 6 hours passed. Then 7, an' then 8. It was time to roll out of bed (10:15). My eyes are all crookit an' I cain't walk straight, an' I got to pee like a sum-a-gun. I feel like shit.

While I was sit'n round yesterday between a little housework an' a few trips round the yard (it was 72 degs), I got to think'n bout "Alice". I had a deep heart felt attachment with Alice. We was in love. Although she was a bit on the ugly side, had a drink'n problem (6.8 MPG), we hanged together through thick an' thin. Had we walk down the aisle an' say our "I do's" for the rest our life, there would be no "Sally da house". You know how that works, a streamlined younger motorhome makes her appearance.....the older gal walks the plank. That's life.

Think'n bout this "build Alice" project, I got myself just a bit on the excitis side. I can do this I bet ya a dollar. My god, if'n I can build a freak'n airplane, a sternwheeler river boat an' a dad gum tug boat, I can build a model motorhome. Did I ever tell ya bout the time....I used to build model train sets? Two HO gauge sets an' one "N" gauge set. You talk bout a expensive hobby....let me tell ya.  

A Walmart special spiral notebook is broke out an' some draw'ns are scribbled down. I searched the internet for measurements, layouts an' photos of Tiffin Open Road motorhomes. Very few photos were found. But I did find a site with all the building materials you could ever hope for. More sites were researched to find a possible chassis (that's the wheels an' frame). Not many choices were found in the model truck sections. *think'n a trip to Toys R Us is in order*

There will be no more discussion on this project until another time. It's still on the draw'n board an' thoughts of "do I really want to do this"? I'm sure YOU will be the first to know.

What started out to be a perfect day, is fall'n apart. Clouds have covered up my beautiful sunshine an' a slight wind has kicked up. The temp is 69 degs. In case you're wonder'n George ( Our Awesome Travels ) , I'm right there with ya. The snow is beautiful. Ya could go outside an' build a snowman an' post a pic of your creation ya know.

I sure have been want'n to go to the golf course an' swak me a few golf'n balls. The next good day for that is Tuesday, an' guess what, the course is closed on Tuesdays.

Bout that apple pie what sucks. I got half a piece left. That will be my breakfast/lunch today. Maybe with a "very berry" pancake an' a couple over easy eggs. I don't eat breakfast ya know, but I do eat lunch.....usually a breakfast. You did know that you can make delicious pancakes out of muffin mix....right?

Bout that big ol' pot of beef stew soup. It come out pretty dad gum good. But I'm think'n Sadie Mae an' them cats out there is gonna help me finish it off. Ain't no way I'm gonna eat that stuff for 5 days in a row. Damn, why do I always make too freak'n much? Oh....did you know that if'n ya cook chunks of meat in a pressure cooker for over 45 minutes, you can take yer teeth out an' eat it like marshmellers? Next time, 30 minutes will be tops.

Ok, I got to git off'n my dead ass an' do something. This old stuff of sit'n all day has got to cease. My buttocks is got blisters. Not really, but you know what I'm talk'n bout. Laters.....
***********************************************************************

After bout 19 hours, I find out todays post did not show up. That's there are no comments.
So....we gonna try to fix it. Will also repost again tomorrow....just for hell of it ya know.

That didn't work....let's try this

Ok, one more try......damn!!!

A night of no sleep

Before I get on with my daily nonsense, I'm gonna tell ya bout a no sleep nightmare. After a fall yesterday night, I was in total 100% authentic pain. An attempt was made at right bout midnight to hit the bed for a wonderful nights sleep. That lasted no more than a minute. I could not lay down. Attempts to doze off in the office chair didn't work. The sooo comfortable recliner was of no help. I'm in for a terrible night. Double dose of pain pills was took.

Sit'n at the computer watch'n TV while read'n a book, the hours passed away. The sun come up. I fell asleep. Yeee Haa!!!

At exactly 9:30, I was aroused by the sound of a bulldozer crank'n up. That dad gum neighbor run slap over my back. That was 2 hours ago, I'm feel'n much better now.

Due to weather conditions....."it's cold Louie", I been think'n "what I'm gonna do now" now that the tug boat is finished. Sit'n on a shelf above the tug boat in a Mississippi river boat that ain't never been finished. Some railings to be installed. Remove an' reinstall all the remote control stuff in a more "manly" manner. Replace all the wiring. Break out a scrub brush an' warsh that thing.

But, a idea hit me right in the head.....build a "Alice". In case you're new to "Billy Bob's Place", you may not know that Alice was the name of my first motorhome. A 29 foot Tiffin Open Road.

Now I ain't say'n that's what I'm gonna do, but it's crossed my mind many times since she went to the "old folks" home.

Ok, I cain't do this today. I need to get some sleep. See ya laters.....

This is NOT nonsense.....it was my day

Holy cows, is it time to get up again? Dang, I just lay down in the bed only a few hours ago an' here it is another day already. Something is miss'n.

The little chick-a-wawa dog was let out of the house to do business. Off to the street that little dog goes. There's cars go up an' down that street, I need to go rescue a dog. Socks an' sandals are put on....a long sleeve shirt with my Walmart list. Are ya git'n the picture....I'm gonna be a hero. Sadie Mae is sit'n in the dashboard winders say'n "ya don't need no stink'n Jeep to rescue that dog". Out the gate I goes, leav'n Sadie Mae look'n out the winder.

I turns left, then make a right an' fore I know it, I'm on the highway to Walmart. It's mist'n rain an' you talk bout cold....it's cold out there (bout 41 or 2 degs). A stop is made at the RV parts sell'n place. I'm gonna get me a screen door slider thingy. "What kind of door do you have"? My only response was "a RV door". No screen door slider thingy was purchased 'cause they don't got any. Up the road a piece, I stops at the Texas State inspection place in Odem. It's colder.....I leave the "billy jeep" run'n. "Do you inspect big ass motorhomes"?  "Yes we inspect big ass motorhomes". That's two items crossed off'n the "to do list".

On the highway to Walmart I cranks the winder wipers up to high. Rain ya know. An' it's freak'n cold. Colder than when I left Sinton not 30 minutes ago. I finds me a good park'n spot close to the door. What the hell, this Walmart is backards. I never park on the grocery side. Over a hunnert dollar later, minus a few much needed items, we headed back to Sinton. It's freak'n cold out here. My fingers are numb....I got the shivers. This is NOT typical south Texas weather. An' there ain't no place to go that's any warmer. I'm think'n a couple three hunnert miles, not thousands.

I bought a apple pie. A big 'un. In the oven it goes.....to warm it up. It's frozen ya know an' "Yeee Haa", it's already baked. My god, this apple pie sucks. Two pieces are eat up just to make sure it really sucks. It does. That was my supper. Along with a couple Alka Seltzers.

On todays agenda, I'm gonna brew me up a pot of beef stew soup in the pressure cooker. I say soup 'cause it's gonna have a pile of veggies in it. Other than that, I'm think'n I ain't gonna do nuttin. It's still too cold outside to go put the tug boat in that trough of donkey water for a pic, but ya never know....it should only take a few minutes.
Well, we can forget that idea.....it don't fit. 

On the brighter side, in a couple or three months, it's gonna be nice an' warm. That's when I'll put my mind in high gear think'n bout a cooler place to camp. Us RV'ers do that ya know. We ain't never satisfied. In the mean time, I'll just sit here an' bitch bout how freak'n cold it is.

Ok, I cain't think of any more excit'n stuff to write bout, so's I'll just hang it up for the day. Wasn't this fun??? 


 

Finished...done, complete...ready for water

Ok, some of my dearest friends will no longer have to hear about that dad gum tug boat. It is finished.

Well, let's take a close look see if'n it's finished or not. Accord'n to the instructions on "how to build a tug boat", all items are checked off. The instructions are no longer of any use to me. Now, when it come to modifications, I bet ya a dollar I'll find me some. If'n it warms up enough today, I will take this tug boat out to the donkey (burrito) water trough an' see if'n it will float or if'n it will sink. I'll try to remember to take a pic or two. Damn it's cold out there....45 degs.

While we are on the subject of build'n stuff, did I ever tell ya bout the time......

It was way back in 1955 an' 1956. I had me a special best friend that thought along the same lines as I did. His last name was Ferguson, his nick name was Fergie. Our interest were identical. Well, maybe not exactly identical, as he didn't like his sister near as much as I did.
In his garage was a pool table. We smacked pool balls around on it. It also served as a hobby table where we spent endless hours building plastic model cars. In my collection of "never quite finished" models, was a 1955 Ford "Woodie" station wagon. It was mostly completed, but as I looked at it, I was think'n "pick'em up truck". Modifications came to mind.
The top was cut down to right behind the front doors. The station wagon part was carefully cut away with a taped up hacksaw blade. The rear door lines were covered/filled with a homebrew Bondo concoction an' sanded smooth. It was now a two door hap hazard pick'em up truck in the make'n. The rear station wagon back hatch winder was made to fit the new roof line....Bondoed an' sanded smooth like it was made that way. Rear tires were changed to larger "hot rod" tires from other models. Twin exhausts were added with chrome tips.
On the shelf was a can of gloss black spray paint. The entire model was disassembled, imperfections filled with that Bondo stuff an' sanded slick. A fresh coat of shiny black paint was applied. With no runs. A total of 3 expertly applied coats of paint complete the paint job. Perfection at it's best. An' I'm only 15 or 16 years old. What does a little 15 year old know bout auto paint'n?
In the mean time "sister"...."damn, what was her name?"... has been hang'n out in the garage watch'n this 1955 Ford Ranchero come to life. Sit'n on a stool right next to me while I'm hold'n back on the cuss'n words an' throw'n stuff...she liked me too.
All parts are reassembled. The front end is dropped. No, I didn't drop it on the floor. The front end was lowered, just like the real hot rod cars run'n the streets spin'n tires an' do'n donuts in a attempt to impress the young ladies. That was a bit before my time. I builded models.
My 1955 Ford Ranchero is complete....sit'n on the display shelf. But wait a minute. Did I tell ya bout what "sister" did? She broke out her sew'n stuff an' builded a "Tonneau" cover for the back end. Solid white with a black diamond in the middle. Where the hell was Brownie Hawkeye at a time like this. I had to give her a big ol' hug, just for the hell of it ya know, for her excellent help. Ha, we both kinda liked that a whole bunch.  "Shut up Fergie, git yer mind out the gutter".

It were but two years later that the Ford Motor Company added to their line up of trucks, the 1957 Ford Ranchero was introduced.

Hurt'n pains again this morn'n....dad gum leg cramps an' such. Along with a whole bunch of  "damn, I wanna go outside". Now I don't know how other old folks that don't like cold days deal with this, but the old Billy Bob sits in "da house" all day. I don't think I'm alone with this procedure. I sure as hell ain't go'n outside an' freeze my ass off do'n stupit stuff. Simple as that. Even Sadie Mae don't spend much time out there. Do her business an' bang on the door to get back in where it's warm. Her's a good dog.

Don't see no use talk'n bout where my mind has been the last few days. I'm talk'n.....that thing is cross wired or something like that. A direct short....sparks an' puffs of smoke. Come on sunshine an' warmer weather, I could use some help here.

Simple chili.....less than a hour

Ok, for ya non-cookers out there. I ain't got nuttin else to write about this morn'n, so's it may as well be a train'n session in cook'n a reasonably good pot of chili. This ain't gonna be no award win'n chili, but it's easy an' will satisfy most anybody's taste buds.  Even south Texans.....home of real Tex-Mex Mexican food.

Go to Walmart for the ingredients. Although, you can purchase them at most any large grocery chain.

1. 2 pounds of ground beef.
Must be 80/20 for the taste giving fat content. Note: Never drain off the fats in a pot of chili.

2. A big ol' yeller onion. It must be yeller.
This will be cut in half an' diced (bout 1/3 cup). The other half can be tossed in the trash can. Or, you could use a smaller onion.

3. One can of diced maters an' one can of mater sauce.
It make no matter what brand you buy....a mater is a mater.
 
4. Three packages of McCormick chili seasoning.
It's a must that you purchase McCormick, otherwise you ain't gonna like your chili.

5. One can of Bushes Chili beans.
Beans in chili is a filler, nuttin more than that. DO NOT....never ever....place kidney beans in a pot of chili, ya ain't gonna like it. It must be nuttin but pinto beans...there's a law bout that ya know, an' Bushes Chili Beans IS pintos.

Ok, let's brew up a pot of easy to make chili. Are ya listen'n MsB???
Put you some oil in your pot. Bout 4 tablespoons full will be just fine. Enough so's the meat don't stick an' burn slap up. Crank the heat up an' start cook'n that 80/20 hamburger meat. Break it up to your own preference. At this time, it's a must, ya gotta do it....add salt an' pepper. Cook'n laws ya know.
When it's bout half cooked....you can tell by look'n at it, add that chopped half a onion. Cook some more, but 8 1/2 minutes be just fine to caramelize them onions...stir'n that stuff from time to time.

It's now time to add the remain'n ingredients, but they must be added in the following order. Maters first. Let it cook some more, like bout 5 minutes or so. Add one can of water at this time, or enough to cover the meat an' maters. Bring it back to a nice boil an' drop the heat to a slow boil. Don't forget this stuff has got to be stirred quite offen.

Open two of them three McCornick chili season packs an' slowly add 'em to the mix. Stir'n all the while ya know. At this point, we have us a pot of chili what can be eat just like it is....but not yet. We gonna add some beans. There's also a rest period that must be adhered to.

Before rest, let's throw in that can of Bushes Chili Beans just for the hell of it. Real chili ain't got no beans ya know, but this one does. Stir it up some more. Give it a taste test. Can ya taste the maters? If not, put ya some that mater sauce in it. Be'n careful not to add too much. Bout half a can will suffice. More water can be added at this time to meet your preference of "soupyness". The addition of water will determine how much more mater sauce an' chili season'n is added....a little at a time. Taste it. Before ya forget, stir it.

Ok, we get'n close now. Crank up the heat again to a nice boil, but no more than a few minutes. Stir it. Taste it. Does it taste something like chili? If not, begin add'n some more of that last pac of McCormick until your taste buds are happy.  
 
Now it has got to rest. Not for 5 minutes, but for a freak'n hour or so.
Yum Yum, eat 'em up MsB !!!!
Please note, this is NOT "Billy Bob South Texas Chili".

I was plumb ass sick yesterday. Ya see, for lunch, I ate me up a left over big ol' bout half pound hamburger patty from the night before. No I didn't leave it sit'n on the stove overnight. Toasted bread, mayo an' a couple thick chunks of Colby cheese....an' some pickles, an' a bunch of Doritos. An' a glass of ice cold milk to warsh it down. That make me sleepy....an' sick like a dog. Alka Seltzer to the rescue....three times before the day is finished. But this morn'n, I feel like a hunnert dollar bill.

Last night I got to think'n. My think'n is headed off in the wrong direction again. I was let'n these "winter blues" an' family stress get to me. This old age an' cain't do nuttin no more get's to me too. But this morn'n, I feel like a hunnert dollar bill. But only after beat'n myself up for the last hour or so. I still have no future plans.

Only thing I done to that tug boat was to repaint that little extra lifeboat. Dang, it looks like a little lifeboat.

Now then, bout the black string on the mast rigg'n. Think'n it may stay black. Sure do wish there was some boat build'n hobbyist read'n this so's they could give me some pointers. Don't nobody got no hobbies???

For Sissy. The tug boat is 34 inches long an' 6 1/2 inches wide. The Mississippi sternwheeler sit'n above it is 36 inches long an' 9 inches wide. Both are 48/1 scale or something like that.

  

Ok, we go'n on to bout 3 hours or so of internet time. "Sheesh Billy Bob, git yerself a life".  


 

History of a tug boat...under construction

Whoa boy howdy, yesterday was a foot stump'n good day. I readed all my normal blogs, the not so excit'n news an' turn me on some cajun music. In nuttin flat, I wasrshed up that sink full of greasy dishes an' put 'em all away in their proper place. That folks, is something to brag about.

A big ol' trash bag was closed up an' placed on the floor next to the door. Due to the weather conditions yesterday, that bag is still sit'n there this morn'n. A walk up the street to the dumpster was not on my agenda. The floors was sweeped an' half ass mopped. Half ass mopped means they were "damp mopped". The desktop was cleared of all kinds of stuff that don't belong on a desktop. "Sally da house" is look'n like a house.

But that was yesterday. This morn'n, the desktop has all kinds of junk lay'n on it. Hobby junk from work'n on the tug boat yesterday. At this rate, the tug boat will be completed in short notice. Way sooner than I was want'n.
Yesterday, the masts were rigged. That means string, turnbuckles, tiny little eyelets an' shit like that. More rope pull'n dooflotchies (bits) was added to the decks. Another life boat was constructed.

Now, let me tell ya bout that rigging for the masts. On a real boat, rigging is installed so's the mast don't fall over an' hit a deckhand on his noggin while out in heavy seas. Or New York harbor. I look at the instructions for mak'n turnbuckles. I don't like that. Modification is in order. We talk'n Dremil tool, needle nose pliers an' tweezers.

 Ten solid brass turnbuckles was constructed. That thingy up against the rail, that is a bit. Six of them was constructed.

Ok, I don't like the color of that string. In order for it to look like real rope, it needs to be tan....or something like that. A trip to Walmart is in order.....tan elastic thread.

Now it's time to get online with Amazon an' order me 5 pounds of lead. At the present time...."rat now", the tug boat weighs right at 5 pounds. The 5 pounds of ballast should make it sit in the water up to the water line (where the red an' black paint meet). This sucker is ready for the bath tub...or a pond, lake, the Gulf of Mexico. Yeee haw....I can hardly wait. 

This dad gum hip is kill'n me again. An' that right foot, it feel like I got a 16 penny nail in it. The lower back is still under control. Thanks to good liv'n an' a bunch of Advils. 

Speak'n of good liv'n, I ain't been do'n too bad lately. I got my ups an' downs....cuss a little bit from time to time, but I'm accept'n the way things are. I've slowed way to hell down, do what little I can an'....I can live with that....an' I grin a lot when I make a good decision. Sadie Mae an' me spend a lot of time sit'n in that chair (the recliner) an' we talk a lot. Although I have no idea what she say'n. What matters most....I'm comfortable.

 

Tug boat look'n good.....Oh Yeah!!!

I suppose today is gonna be "another one them days". It's been sprinkle rain for the last two days an' colder an' hell out there. Not so bad this morn'n at 53 degs. But the ground is sop'n wet....mud puddles an' stuff like that. That makes for a change in plan for tomorrow, Monday. Golf ball swak'n is no longer on the agenda.
"My god, I see sunshine"......yeeee haw!!!!

About housework. My god, "Sally da house" look like the city dump before they bulldoze all that stuff underground. It's warm enough today that I may just do something bout that. God I hate warsh'n dishes.

I was sit'n here yesterday an' got to think'n bout that tug boat. "Let's paint the lifeboat davits black". I break out some painters tape an' start mask'n off the red cabin sides, leav'n only them tiny pieces of brass tubing exposed. Don't want no black paint on the red paint ya know. I painted the brass tubing black....but only on the cabin sides. There is no way in hell I'm gonna try to paint the tops sides of them boat davits. From my house, they look just fine brass colored.

Then I figgered I would build the winch for the anchors an' big ol' ropes. Along with something to tow stuff....that black tow'n thingy. All tug boats have these ya know. 

Here's the other one them tow'n thingys. Look'n pretty good if'n I do say so myself. 

That all I did on the tug boat yesterday. In bout 6 hours or so. Life is good when ya got a tug boat to work on.

Ok, that soup is got to go. I ain't eat'n no more that stuff. Think'n I might just throw it in a zipper bag an' freeze what's left. But I know how that works out, it will still end up in the dumpster. I bet ya a dollar, the next time I make a big ol' pot of any kind of soup, that pot is gonna be only half full. That would be right at a gallon.

I got me a terrible problem an' don't know how to handle it. Ya see, since I been back in Texas, I've been abandoned by my family, left to fend for myself. No phone calls. No emails. No nuttin. I know what it is, but I ain't chang'n my way of life to fit theirs....to do what they say to do. I'll cuss if'n I want to. I'll eat what I want to. I'll sleep as long as I want to. It's MY life, not theirs to do as they say.

I'm think'n when it's warm enough, I'll make me a trip back to Georgia an' take them kids out behind the barn an' have me a talk with 'em. Gives me something to ponder on while I freeze my ass off an' work on that tug boat in south Texas.

I had me a really nice time in Georgia this last summer. Kids an' grandkids in an' out all hours of the day. Build'n stuff. Fix'n "Sally da house". Sit'n round tell'n stories....drink'n up a cup. It's a year I'll never forget. But, "shit kids an' grandkids, I'm still alive".

Ok, I got stuff to do. Damn I hate warsh'n dishes.

Think'n bout better days.....spring an' summer

Don't know where I'm go'n with this this morn'n, but we gonna start off with grandkids. You know what I'm talk'n bout...."papaw/gramma, tell me bout the time". In order for that to happen, ya gotta have kids of your own that run away from home at a early age an' git hitched up. The rest comes naturally.....you are a grandparent, baby sitter, or a loan institution. Ha ha, just kid'n bout the loan institution, but ya better have a $20 dollar bill (edited from $5 to $20) in yer pocket at all times. 

In my case, I got way too many grandkids to give equal attention to. Try 20 plus. On many occasions, I have had up to 10 grandkids in "Alice" or "Sally da house" at one time. This folks ain't quality time. Ya git bout 10 quick hugs an' kisses an' in nuttin flat you're sit'n in a corner all by yereslf, slap ignored, as they scream an' holler, play video games, Facebook'n, eat up all your chocolate chip cookies an' a fight breaks out. "I was sit'n there....git up".

It's hard to choose "the special one" when ya got so many to choose from...."errr, what's yer name"? Before ya know it, they are all grow'n up into little adults (late teens) an' they ain't got no time for papaw an' gramma no more. They ain't interested in hear'n your stories no more. They've switched from "ya got any cookies" to "take me to the mall".

On my computer, I keep all my pics from the last 12 years. My screen saver shows them pics. Ever time one the grandkids show up on the screen, I give a great big ol' grin. I love my grandkids...."errrr, what's yer name"? 

I don't know what happen, but I got this terrible pain in my middle back. You know, like something slip out of place. Ever time I take a deep breath, there's that pain. I only get half a breath. Now if'n I was to go see a doctor, all he gonna do is ask me if I smoke, tell me a gazillion reasons why smok'n is bad for ya....and then hand me a bill. Non smokers tell me the same thing. Even call me names. Low life, douchbag....stupit, stuff like that. In my book, these non smokers need to take a close look in a mirror before they pass judgement on me. Now I ain't say'n that I wouldn't like to be smoke free, but I enjoy my smokes just as much as the next person enjoys their Twinkies an' chocolates. So there...stick that in yer pipe an' smoke it.

In an' attempt to have a excit'n life....or something like that, ya gotta think ahead. I been do'n that. "What am I gonna do this spring an' summer"? Well, winter time ain't the best time to think bout shit stuff like that. In the winter time you 'sposed to be think'n bout build'n snowmans, how to get the truck out that ditch, how to fix froze up water pipes, shovel'n 3 feet of snow off the sidewalk....think SNOW an' you'll be just fine. But my thoughts ain't been on snow. They been on sunshine, warmth an' adventure. Mountains, desert an' stuff like that. Fish'n an' golf ball swak'n. Put'n that tug boat in the water. Now granted, it ain't gonna be nuttin like it was a few years ago, but dad gum it, I can dream cain't I? If these things don't come to pass, I can live with that. I'll still be Billy Bob an' I'll just find me something else to do. Have ya ever builded a RV shelter? Ducks out in the pond. Rainbow trout swin'n in the stream. A big ol' bulldozer sit'n in the yard. See, I ain't quite dead yet. Dreams last a lifetime.

As much as I hate, I'm gonna cut this session of Billy Bob's adventures short. It's freak'n cold outside an' I got me some think'n to do. Come on sunshine, help me out here.

More of the same....cold weather an' nonsense

What a difference a day makes. I've heard that somewheres before......a movie??? Or was it a Roy Rogers song?

When I waked up this morn'n, I look out the winders. What the hell ??? It's rain'n, there ain't no sunshine an' it looks just like winter. It's 40 degs out there. That right there is enough to make anybody want to jump right back in bed under the covers. My feet are cold, my freak'n back hurts, I got me a sour disposition.....poor Sadie Mae got yelled at, an' I just don't give a shit this morn'n. I'll attempt to keep that to myself so's nobody else read'n this don't catch it too. Dang I hate days like this.

Now yesterday was different. I feeled good all day long. I even had me some thoughts run through my head of "a trip". Apparently "mama nature" made today a dreary day just to show me how stipit it is to think bout "a trip". The one place I want to go an' would like to be dur'n the winter cold, is no different than what I got right here. Cold, rainy, no sunshine an' nasty as hell.

I see the OFM Barney moved down the road a piece to Falcon Lake in way down south Texas. I been watch'n Falcon Lake, an' as far as I'm concerned, it's still too early to be boondock'n down that way. My god, I would freeze slap to death. Barney also posted a pic of my last camp'n site at the Community Park in Falcon Heights. Somebody needs to mow my yard. Then he talked to my trees. Ain't nobody talks to trees.....sheesh! I hope the weather changes down there so's Barney can do the things he went there to do. Mess with my 14 pounds bass fish Barney an' we gonna have a little talk.

In the mean time, I got to think of something to do. It ain't that I don't have nuttin to do, it's just that I ain't been do'n nuttin. It's easy to sit here an' think of a gazillion things to do, but to get off'n my ass an' do 'em....I ain't figger that'un out yet.

Now, get'n back to the new rules in Texas. Talk'n vehicle safety inspections an' registrations. The "billy jeep" is due in January. This means I cain't be off in another state come inspection an' registration time. "Sally da house" is due in September. This means I cain't be off in another state come inspection an' registration time. This affects those two months for any out of state travels. All I got to say bout these new rules is Grrrrrrrrrr...!!!! Maybe enough full time RV'ers will complain an' the State of Texas will give us some slack.

Have ya ever make too much soup? It's go'n into the third day an' I still got half a pot of that soup. It tastes just fine, but I'm not want'n soup again today. Now, for people talk'n bout freez'n soup, I don't do that. Ever time I take a bag of froze soup out the freezer, heat it up, it ain't no good no more. This is from 40 years of experience freez'n leftovers, so don't be say'n I don't freeze it right. I mean, like sheesh....what's the right way to freeze soup?

Well shoot, I was all excitis, pat'n myself on the back an' stuff like that, for fix'n that "red light'n" water heater. Yeee Haa, I fix a water heater. A couple days ago, that sum-a-gun red light come on. Ok, I know the rules, ya don't leave a water heater burn'n 24 hours a day in a RV. Ya turn that sucker off. A simple click of a switch an' it's off. Not only do you save on propane, the red light don't never come on. In a RV it take right at 15 minutes to heat up to bout 140 degs, what the hell do ya need hot water for while you're sound asleep in bed? That's the way I look at it anyhows.

No work has been done on that tug boat. Not that I haven't thought bout it. But shoot, my desktop is a total disaster with junk lay'n all over the place. Why is there a 12 inch crescent wrench, a skill saw an' a bunch of screwdrivers lay'n on my desktop? Dang, I need to do me some house clean'n.

Ok, that's all the nonsense I can think of this morn'n. I'm out of here. See ya tomorrow with more of the same.

Good eats an' the beginning

Boy howdy, if'n ya wanna strike up a conversation, mention food. Seems like food is one of the fondest memories from our childhoods.....as per comments. Everbody remembers what they ate grow'n up. Biscuits an' gravy, cornbread an' beans.  Did ya know, I never eat a pinto bean until I move to south Texas back in 1964. Before that it was navy beans an' butter beans.....with raw onions, a splash on cider vinegar an' cornbread smothered with butter. A big ol' glass of cold milk to warsh it all down.

Speak'n of good eat'n, have ya ever eat a peanut butter an' onion sammich?  

It was WW II when I was on the farm, an' then for a few years after before my wonderful dad pick me up. *a little sarcasm in that statement*. Now how many dads would come home from the war in 1945 an' not pick up their kids from a orphan home (the farm) until bout 1949? But anyhows, that was just the beginning of a life of liv'n alone. Well, I wasn't really alone, I just didn't have me no parental guidance like most other kids my age.

I didn't really wanna touch on the subject of "bad times", but them times are also a part of my life. Times I would like to forget, but even at my age today, they pop up from time to time. Ya don't forgit shit like that.

I remember this day very well. The day I was picked up from "mom's" place in St Charles, Mo. I was placed in the back of a old pick'em up truck. In the front was my dad, his girlfriend (possibly wife) or what ever, an' some red headed, red faced, fully unaware of his surroundings, beer drink'n dude. This was the first time in my life that I ever tasted chaw bakkee (SP) (chewing tobacco). Dad an' the red face guy both spit that stuff out the front winders. Don't know if girlfriend/wife or what ever chew that stuff or not, but she weren't at all friendly either way.

It was fresh beer time....an' I gotta pee.....an' warsh this crap off'n my face, arms, an' brand spank'n new shirt. Have ya ever sit in the back of a pick up go'n a hunnert mile a hour down the highway an' try to dodge chaw bakkee juice? The three of 'em jump out the pick up laugh'n an' cut'n up. I'm ordered to remain in the back until we reach out destination......Dad's loving 3 room cottage an' a bath in Baden, Mo.....4 hours later.
This was the beginning.

Now bout good times. Good times take me back to the farm where my life was normal for the 40's. Pester the farm critters. Ride'n on the backs of new borned (a week or so old) cow puppies. Set'n out houses on fire. Run'n in the woods, climb'n trees....eat'n gooseberrys an' cow lick salt. Skeer'n hell out sleep'n cats. This is what normal kids done back then an' that is only scratch'n the surface. My first 9 years of life was wonderful years what will never be forgotten. A few whoop'ns here an' there, yelled at a bit, chased an' beat up by the older boys....yes, them was wonderful years.

So what does a farm house look like? We had a little liv'n room, a dining room, a kitchen with a wood burn'n stove, ice box an' this great big ol' table where we all ate. All 8 of us. One bedroom on the first floor. That's where I sleeped. Upstairs was one big room.....a attic with nuttin but beds an' a couple dressers. That's where the older boys sleeped. We took our weekly baths in a wash tub out on the back porch, or in the kitchen dur'n the winter time. One tub of water an' 6 dirty boys. I was always the first, so I was always the cleanest. Not that that lasted very long.

When I tell my kids an' grandkids bout eat'n desert off'n the bottoms of our plates, they say "WHAT?, you did what"?  Ya see, when ya live on a farm an' ya ain't got run'n water, 8 desert dishes is extra unnecessary work. It also served another purpose....to eat your entire supper or ya don't git no desert. We sopped up any juices with a slab of fresh out the oven backed bread. We licked our plates ya know. That's just the way ya do things on the farm.

We ate good on the farm. Meat bout onest or twiest a week, usually Sundays. God I loved fried chicken. Fried eggs in the morn'ns. Piles of pancakes with tons of fresh churned butter an' home built syrup. Some bacon on the side. Oatmeal by the bucket full. Biscuits an' gravy.....yum boy howdy. Big ol' glasses full if cold milk out the ice box (cold be'n bout 50 degs). Are ya hungry yet????

Ok, back to reality.....it's freak'n cold outside. Got down to bout 33 degs last night an' it was still in the 30's when I finally roll out of bed. I check the inside temp. It's 55 freak'n degs in here. I don't know bout anybody else, but 55 degs is freak'n cold. Ya see, I turn the two electric heaters way down at night. Ya don't need a bunch of heat when you're wrapped up in a bunch of blankets. I fire up the Mr Heater on 9,000 btu's an' in nuttin flat....my god, it's hot in here.

Had I remained in Georgia for the winter, there would be no blog post this morn'n. I would be froze slap to death right there in "yo mama's" yard. It was 3 degs there this morn'n. That folks is COLD. Seems this winter is a repeat of last winter in south Texas. Well, I guess you could say it a repeat for the entire country. My god, I see people brag'n bout be'n in the -20's an' -30's....wind chill that is. I don't do wind chill. I do the REAL temp thing. If'n it's 30 degs, it's 30 degs. Not some god awful minus something to make ya feel special. Think maybe I'll just leave it at that. Too many people get all piss off if'n I don't think like they do. Wind chill.....sheesh!!!

Get'n used to something ya don't like to do is hard. I been think'n bout this for a long time, but I ain't said much about it. With my old age.....don't go say'n nuttin, an' the health issues I have, I have slowed down to a crawl. That's something I never figgered would happen to me in my lifetime. I've always managed to find some kind mischief to get into, life threaten'n adventures, build'n stuff, get'n all excitis bout my life.....mak'n plans for tomorrow. In the last years time, most that stuff has come to a screech'n halt. I'm attempt'n to accept things as they are. A cold ass winter is of no help. But, I can say, my life is comfortable. I got a bed to sleep in, two very comfortable chairs, hot an' cold run'n water. A computer to keep me entertained. The "billy jeep" is sit'n out there just in case I want to go somewheres. Like a trip to Walmart....that's always excit'n. What would I like to change? Well hell, that's easy....take 20 years off my life an' give me the health of a teenager. That's just for starters.

Well shoot, yesterday I didn't do a thing.....nuttin. Got a few more dirty dishes, but shoot, the sink ain't full yet. Same ol' shit lay'n on the floor, but shoot, I ain't got no company com'n this way. Sides that, Sadie Mae don't give a crap either way. Dogs just walk around stuff ya know.....don't faze 'em a bit.

Ok, that's it for another excit'n day. See ya tomorrow.