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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Big bang theory....by Billy Bob & Company

Dad gum it, I don't know where to start this morn'n. Well, I could tell ya I feel much better this morn' than what I did yesterday. I actually walked a straight line to the coffee pot. "Hmmmmm...not a bad cup of coffee Billy Bob".

Before I was so rudely innerrupted yesterday (yes I know that's spell wrong...innerrupted is a redneck word), my thoughts was on winter. An' I was gonna tell ya all bout it. I made it all the way to Phoenix an' in the door walks "yo mama"....jaws a flap'n. "Ya got any coffee"? In walks granddaughter. Face a glow with smiles, big ol' hugs an' a hairbrush. The phone rings....it's Billy. "I'll be there in a few minutes....ya need anything"? I can only talk to one person at a time. I quit writ'n my blog.

Me an' Billy jump in his truck an' goes to Home Depot. We gonna look at hinges for the plexiglass cabinet doors. Just in case, I take along my HD shop'n list. Dang, we almost forget the hinges an' it still costed me almost $50. Betcha a dollar ya don't know what was on my HD shop'n list. If'n ya think'n fried taters, you close.

Back at "da house", Billy get all excitis bout them hinges. Trys 'em this way an' trys 'em that way. "This ain't gonna work daddy". I take one look an' says...."modify 'em". An' that's what we did. No one will ever know. They will work perfect. I modify stuff ya know.

What I have now is no longer a flat hinge, it's a offset hinge.....just what I was need'n.

Now what could all this stuff be for?

If you guessed "spud gun from hell", you got it right. Dang....I git'n excitis. But this is a "papaw" "grandson" project, so's I got to wait for Mack to show up with his work'n clothes on. The barrel inside dimension has been decreased due to the cost of potatoes. White Rain hair spray will be the propellant, ignited with a Walmart special bbq grill spark ignition device. "Hey Bubba, watch this".

Update.....
I jist go back an' read bout 4 more comments on yesterdays post.
I need to make it plain that my insurance covers 100% what I get fixed in the US. In Mexico, I would have to pay. An' speak'n of Mexico, I ain't go'n. I don't want to go. I ain't lost nuttin there. I git all I want an' need right here at home. But....I would go shop'n there.....hint, hint, hint. "Ya ain't got no passport Billy Bob......sheesh". 

   


Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Itty bitty blog post....bout nuttin

Holy crap, I so much wanted today to be a good day. My god, I can hardly walk this morn'n.

I been do'n a lot of think'n bout the condition of my back issues. You know, think'n back a few years bout when the pain started get'n really bad. It's been gradual.....not all at oncest. Up to bout three years ago, I had a constant bearable pain, what I accepted an' could live with for the rest of my life. The next two years I bitched an' moaned. This last year, that's all I talk about.....as I sit on my ass.

Oh, before I forget, my surgeon doctor appointment has been changed. It's now Aug. 5th at 1pm.

Now bout where I'm gonna end up this winter. You already know it's gonna be somewheres where it's warm, night time temps in the lower 40's is acceptable. I usually "boondock" (no hook ups) every winter. Do ya know how much $$$$ ya can save by not pay'n outrageous monthly space rental?  But, this winter may be different....as I tole ya yesterday. In the comments yesterday, it was suggested I spend the winter in Arizona. Even had me one invitation in Phoenix. That's the place I said I would never ever go back to.

Oh crap....forget it....too much company to be writ'n a blog. See ya tomorrow.

Monday, July 21, 2014

Is it winter yet???

If day time temps were in the lower 40's, I would be stand'n in snow. I'm talk'n bout this winter ya know.

A few suggestions were made yesterday for a comfortable winter stay. Phoenix be'n one of 'em.
I drove through Phoenix one time. I drove....an' I drove....an' I drove....an' I was still in Phoenix. It was cold (Feb, 2002). I swored I would never ever go through Phoenix again. An' I ain't yet. By the time we finally got out of Phoenix, "first mate" Vickie Lynn was already stone drunk an' wanted tacos from Taco Bell. But that's another story.

I've found that anywheres north of I-10 is not a great winter destination for somebody that don't do cold. Maybe a week or two in one them places, but when the old Billy Bob sets up camp for the winter, he is there for a while. But....I was younger then....all full of piss an' vinegar. This year will be much different I rekon, consider'n all the freak'n health crap I got go'n on.

In the entire US, there are only three places that meet my winter needs. I been watch'n them weather guys ya know. Out west, in southern Ca., Yuma an' Quartzite included, the winters are perfect. In Texas, down in the Rio Grande Vally, the winters are perfect. An' then ya got Florida. Take yer pick.

But, as I just said....this winter will be different. In the back my mind, I'm think'n RV park with full hook-ups. Walmart just down the road a piece. A Mexican restaurant with-in walk'n distance. "Ha Billy Bob, like you're gonna walk anywheres". Golf courses. See what I'm get'n at?
I have no plans for this winter. An' now is the time to be think'n bout it.

After I visit the surgeon next month, I may have me some different thoughts. But as of today....this is it.

I ain't been camp'n yet ya know. My god, I been in Ga. for two months an' all I do is sit here "think'n" bout camp'n. Not that I'm well enough to be climb'n all over the place in the north Ga. mountains an' stuff like that.....but damn, I wanna go camp'n. Camp fires, cook'n up fresh catched rainbow trout....scream'n at the grandkids....stuff like that.

But, as I sit here think'n bout all that stuff, fellow blogger Gypsy is busy set'n up her camp tent in campgrounds all over northern California. Walk'n a hunnert miles a day. Tak'n beautiful pictures of "a camp'n trip". Dang that woman make me feel soooo jealous.

Ha....dishes are warshed. I was sit'n here last night an' said "what the hell, let's do some dishes". Dang, I hate to warsh dishes.

Now....do I go shop'n at Walmart today?      

Sunday, July 20, 2014

Talk'n in a big circle

Oh boy, today is Sunday. Does that mean I get to "do nuttin" today.

I don't know how all ya people see my days, but on this end, I always get something done before the sun goes down. I mean....like, if it's only to sweep the floor, I got something done.

Now, bout that parking brake "fix" I been talk'n bout for a week or so. You may think Robert is the only one up under "da house" work'n on that thing, but let me tell ya right now, the old Billy Bob was up under there too, show'n him what to do. I got the bruises to prove it. I know bout that kind of shit ya know.
Well anyways, the drum is still hang'n up....drag'n. One cable is not releasing all the way. Hmmmm, must be something wrong with that there cable.
Ahh ha, there is something wrong with that cable. See that white plastic sleeve? The cable runs through that thing. An' it hangs up in that thing. The purpose of the sleeve is so's the cable don't wear out slide'n back an' forth. I tear that dad gum plastic sleeve slap out....throws it in the dumpster. Now the cable works perfectly. Ever thing is put back together, shoes adjusted an' "tested" for correct operation. Yeee haa, check it off'n the "fix it" list. No more nightmares bout "Sally da house" sink'n in some lake somewheres down the road. I am sooo proud of my wonderful son Robert.

Speak'n of down the road....where the hell do I want to go for winter? Old man winter, that's "mama nature's" grandpa ya know, will be here in short order. I say short order 'cause I ain't gonna be in Georgia when the first norther hits here. Ya gotta plan ahead for this kind of stuff ya know. A couple three four months ahead.

As far as I'm concerned, Falcon Lake in way down south Texas, on the border with Mexico, is out this year. That big ol' 14 pounds bass fish is just gonna have to wait for better times afore I catches him.
I can see it now, I wake up some morn'n, look out into my camp'n site an' there's a hunnert kids wait'n for me to fix breakfast. I ain't the only one avoid'n the border towns as this immigration thing is go'n on. You did see in the news didn't ya, where border patrol was fired on with high power rifles from Mexico? When it was over, 50 kids surrendered to the officers after they had safely crossed the Rio Grande river into the US. That was in way down south Texas. Did I hear somebody say "winter in Florida"? 

Well damn, somebody left a half a can of coke on my brand spank'n new desk. Grankids need to be more respectful of new stuff. It got turned slap over....coke all over the desk top. Bout 10 paper towels later, the coke is gone an' desktop somewhat neat....removal of all the stuff what got throwed up there. Tools, boxes of screws, duct tape, measure sticks (yard sticks), saws, files....well shoot, you know what I'm talk'n bout....work'n stuff.

Speak'n of work'n on stuff, I like to work on stuff. Well it ain't really work, it's more like a hobby. I sit here, take a look at something....."I can fix or modify that". I do fix stuff what don't need to be fixed.....just to be do'n something. But, it ain't like it used to be.....now days I'm slow an' I ain't in no hurry. "Tomorrow Billy Bob, it will still be there tomorrow".

Now....do I do dishes on a Sunday, or do I wait till tomorrow? Got to sit down, sip me up a cup an' do me some think'n bout that. What ever choice I make, it will still be a good one. 

Saturday, July 19, 2014

Short man syndrome....a short post

Todays post will be a short 'un. Ya see, Robert showed up a bit early an' he's want'n to go places. Find some hinges for the plexiglass cabinet doors.

Speak'n of go'n places.....Robert picked up my shorty propane tank this morn'n from Ace Hardware. I'm sooo proud of my son. This is gonna be sooo much easier than tote'n round a hunnert pound tank.

Ok, now what do ya do with the 5 gallon tank? Ha, that's a simple decision.....dumpster.

11:30am.... Robert decided he would climb up under "da house" an' remove the parking brake shoes for clean'n an' install the cable return spring. That should fix up the park'n brake problem. More on this when everthing is put back together.

It rained. Not near as much as was forecast by the weather guy, but it is/was still rain. Dang I hate rain.

My mind wandered off on my back issue again last night. I got to think'n "what if". Then later I had me a dream. OFM Barney showed up at my door want'n to go play a round of golf. I grab holt to my walker an' away we go to the golf course. There IS that possibility ya know. I just have to accept it if it happens that way. Damn I hate walkers on the golf course.

Pain level this morn'n was a bit more than I expected since it was down last night....an' most of yesterday. Did I spend too much time in Ace Hardware....bout a hour or so??? There was no couch time involved. Damn I hate that couch.  I still need to order the new foam rubber for that sucker.

That milk'n stool. Ha, you ain't took ya a close look at it have ya? Using it last night, I done figger out it may not be the correct height. Or maybe I shouldn't prop my feet up at all. One or the other......I was NOT float'n on a cloud.

I'm gonna leave todays post at this. Will catch up to ya tomorrow.



Friday, July 18, 2014

Yesterday was a total success....yeeee haaa!!!!

Whoa, slow down....take it easy. I'll get my meds.....but it's just the way I need to go about it. I was just pass'n time yesterday when I mentioned Dr. Fronkinstool an' his stress test....meds an' stuff. I'm still good up till the end of Sept an' a simple phone call will renew my prescriptions for another month. In that time, I will figger out what I want to do. I surely won't be look'n in Ga. for a NEW doctor. There's 30\18 of 'em in Corpus Christi. "Yo Mama's" doctor would probly write me a prescription if'n it comes down to it.
Dang....now ya got me all twist up think'n bout that stuff.

I do need to mention bout that stress test. The first part of it is to get my heart rate way to hell an' gone....a hunnert mile a hour. They do it with a freak'n needle 'cause my back injuries won't let me on a treadmill. But the important part of the stress test is the nuclear part (inject some kind of radioactive shit in me an' run me through a open MRI look'n machine). Look'n for leaks in the bypasses they done. 

Yeee haaa....boy howdy an' all that good stuff. I'm talk'n bout that auto park brake system on "Sally da house". There are days when ya fix something an' feel good bout it....even give a little smile at the good work ya done. But let me tell ya....I was smil'n from one ear to the other one. Had me one them possum grins.

Ya see....this auto park system on "Sally da house" is a MAJOR repair....Oh wait, I don't say repair, I say fix. I spend hour after hour think'n bout what could be wrong....how much it gonna cost me. I have nightmares bout "da house" roll'n down some hill, entering some lake an' ....sink'n....while I'm in Walmart buy'n stuff.
Anyhows, Robert crawl up under there, after preparations. *preparations: Key on, tranny in neutral, leveling jacks up, auto park button pushed in, rear wheels chocked/chalked....blocked* This put the park brake in the off position.....it will roll at the slightest touch. An hour later the drive shaft is disconnected. The parking brake drum is lay'n on the ground. Looks brand spank'n new to me. The brake shoes are inspected. Look brand spank'n new to me.

No need to spend a few hunnert dollars for new parts. Up to this point, me an' Robert are all excitis. Nuttin left to do but put it back together an' adjust the brake shoes (drive shaft disconnected).

Now we have a problem. The shoes drag when ya turn the drum. That's no good. We pull the brake drum for the third time. Hmmmm, the shoes are hang'n up, not return'n to the full off (disengaged) position. WD-40 that sucker. It still don't return. To make this short.....hahahahaha....lololol....we find the cables are hang'n up, not the shoes. I notice a cable return spring is missing. Now we all excitis again.....we can fix this....an' we call it a day. With big smiles on our faces.

Foot stool project is finished. Now I can go milk me some cows. That's what it look like...a freak'n cow milk'n stool. When not using it, I can hide it up under the desk....out of sight.
"Billy Bob, you don't build ugly stuff like that". Apparently he do. He's a redneck ya know.

Ok, it's now time to head down the road a piece. Ace Hardware for the missing spring. Auto parts store for some clean'n stuff for the brake shoes an' drum. Drop off empty prescriptions at Walmart for refills.
"Sadie Mae....ya wanna go for a ride"?

 

Thursday, July 17, 2014

We got work to do...

After yesterdays "needle" doctor follow up on my MRI's, I gotten a further dislike for doctors. Although.....this guy IS professional in what he has learned from "skool". Kind of make me wonder if'n they teach in them doctor schools....if the patient is old, tell 'em "it cain't be fixed".

So where I sit today, time has been wasted. I say wasted 'cause if'n I had seen a surgeon in the first place, I could possibly be scheduled for surgery next week. Or maybe even recover'n from surgery. But....I do at least have a MRI and a appointment with a surgeon to take a "look see".

Speak'n of my surgeon. Google is your best friend. This guy specializes in what is wrong with my back. He does reconstructive surgery what I hope I don't need. Ha....he even gives shots.
Out of bout 20 patient reviews, he is top notch. Calls ya by name, not number. Has compassion. Talks to ya like a friend, not a doctor. Explains everthing an' gives options. His success rate is right up there with the best....a 5. Rating numbers 1 to 5. I suppose I'll wait for another month to see what my remaining life will be like. Ha....sit'n out on "da porch" sip'n up a cup, lookn out across a lake full of big ol' bass fishes.

Robert showed up this morn'n all full of piss an' vinegar...."let's fix stuff". I weren't ready yet, wait'n for that other eye to open an' aspirin to kick in. Damn....it was cold last night. Try 56 degs at "da house".

We gonna tackle the parking brake problem today. Now the problem......how the hell do ya release a auto park'n brake to work on it? Note: A auto parking brake has no hand lever or no foot lever to set the parking brake. It's all done by hydraulics....relays, sensors, high pressure pumps....stuff like that. Wish us luck.

Ok, bout that foot stool thingy I was gonna make. I went out there, fires up the table saw an' I builds me a foot stool. But it don't look nuttin like what I had in mind. But....it will do the job an' it's ugliness I can hide under the desk.....only to be seen at night when I prop my feet up on it. Now if I can only talk "yo mama" into cover'n the foam rubber with some cheap material. Hmmmmm....I got me a idea, the material out the back of that jacket I never wear. Was gonna throw it in the dumpster anyhows.

Now, what the hell am I gonna do for the next two months? I know one thing, I'm gonna miss my yearly appointment with Dr. Frinkansteen in Deming. That's my heart doctor ya know....the one I was gonna fire an' find me a replacement in Corpus Christi, Texas. Ha....I procrastinated didn't I???
Anyhows, come the first of Sept. I'm gonna need another years prescriptions for my heart meds. Had also decided that 2014 was the year I would get that stress test I been put'n off for the last 4 years.

Damn I hope I make it to 2015.