UPDATE>>>>This post for backyard mechanics, automotive engineers an' ecletronics technitions

Boy howdy I been scratch my head for a few weeks now with this damn "billy jeep" not run right. Yesterday I had me a plus in my "Billy Bob can fix anything" attempts to find the cause of the problems. Expect some details...that's the way I do things.

If'n ya remember, a couple months ago the battery was slap dead. I have what is called a 40 amp "smart" battery charger what is operated by electronics. The battery was fully charged with this charger. The engine was cranked up. It don't run right. Hard to start an' rpm only go to bout 2500 with a Rrrrrrr, Rrrrrr, Rrrrrr at that rpm. The engine was shut down an' the battery charger was stowed. Ya see, it was way way too cold for the old Billy Bob to be sit'n outside in a cold car try'n to figger out why this sucker don't run right.

A month passes. It's warmer. I goes outside to start the "billy jeep". Errrrrr, Errrrrr. Errrrrrr....the freak'n battery is low again. Battery charger is hook up again an' I charge up that battery overnight. The next day I goes crank 'er up. The battery charger is still hook up. What the hell, it don't run right. Rrrrrr, Rrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr....2500 rpm.

Ok, let me 'splain something bout cars. They are operated by computer....an' a gazillion little electronic devices what talk to the computer to make it go a hunnert mile a hour in 6.3 seconds. The designer of these computers was thoughtful. He added a mode called "limp home mode". The car will run, but ya ain't never gonna go a hunnert mile a hour. This is the mode that the "billy jeep" goes into. There's more details I could go into, but what the hell, I ain't gonna.

Ok, yesterday. I have a back doctor appointment. While wait'n for "yo mama", my driver, I cranks up the Jeep. Just as expected....Rrrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr....2500 rpms. I says a few words an' off to the doctor appointment. Think'n all the way.

On return, I says "let's reset the computer". On most cars, all ya gotta do is disconnect the battery an' wait bout 3 minutes an' walla, the computer is reset. But not on my Jeep. Ya gotta disconnect the positive battery terminal an' touch it to the negative terminal for a minute. This discharges the capacitors in the computer....an' walla, the computer is reset. I do that. I crank the "billy jeep" up an' it sound like hell. Barley get it crank up an' it's in "limp home mode". Before I go on too much further, in the last couple months, it's cranked up a few times just like it suppose to do.....think hunnert mile a hour. Then all a sudden it run like shit.
Ok, back to yesterday. I'm stand'n outside. The "smart" battery charger is hook up. The engine is run'n an' sound like shit. The charger is put'n 37 amps into my charged battery. Think'n this is way way too much charge for a charged battery, I disconnect the positive cable. The freak'n engine die....shut slap down.
I goes an' crank it back up. MY GOD, it sound like a hunnert dollar bill. Rpm go to 8000 rpm lickity split. Scratch head an' crank it up bout 10 more times....sound like a hunnert dollar bill each time.
I gotta go pee, brew up a pot an' do me a little think'n. 

Before I go any further.....this was yesterday, not today. Will it crank up an' go a hunnert mile a hour today? I'll let ya know after I find my other shoe. Until then....laters.

Well shit, I wrote all that stuff for nuttin. Fount my shoe an' go outside an' crank that thing up. Yeeee Haaa, it sound perfect. That is for bout 5 start ups. Then the freak'n engine just die....shut down. Crank it back up 3 times in "limp home mode". What the hell??? Then it start up an' sound like a hunnet dollar again. For another 8 start ups. Ha ha, I had to pee so I'm back inside. Scratch'n my head. Gonna do me some Google research an' see what I find. Back laters.

Damn Jeep.....Grrrrrrr

It's been said by me an' it's been said by others, that daily blog writ'n is com'n to a end. There are many reasons you don't see daily blog posts any more, but the most probable reason be'n..."I ain't got nuttin to write about". That's the excuse I been us'n for quite some time now. I would love to change that, but....damn, I gotta do something to write bout it.

In my younger days, like just a couple years ago, I would see somebody sit'n in a easy chair watch'n TV at 10am an' I would say...."I ain't never gonna do that". Then things got worster. My fish'n poles ain't even been looked at in the last 2 years. My golf'n clubs are cry'n "let's go swak a ball". The poor old "bubba boat" is stowed out of sight an' it's registration is expired. The remote control boats are sit'n on shelfs collect'n dust. I ain't done nuttin.

Boy howdy you aughter hear me go into a cuss'n spasm when this freak'n Dell computer locks up in the middle of "surf'n". I did me some research on it. It ain't Dell's fault, it's that damn Windows 10 what caused it. Now the Toshiba laptop has been upgraded to Win 10 an' it's just fine. But in my research I find I ain't the only one that has lock up problems. There are thousands that has 'em. An' there ain't no cure. Win 10 changes something in the computer an' the computer says...."what the hell???"....then it just shuts down...all lock up.

Me an' "yo mama" jump in her truck an' head off to the back doctor. Take bout 45 minutes to get there. An' My God, "yo mama's" driv'n scare the hell out me. We get to the doctors office an' there ain't no cars in the park'n lot. I goes inside. The nice little girl tells me...."I been call'n you 4 times". "We have no doctors here today". She had the wrong number on the computer. Next appointment is Friday at 3pm.....a different doctor. All I'm want'n is a appointment for a nerve kill'n. Will see how that works out.

I don't like my new coffee pot. You cain't get a cup of coffee while it's brew'n....an' I want my coffee right now. It takes more grinds that the old Mr Coffee for the same amount of cups. Then it still don't taste right. I'll never ever buy me another expensive coffee maker.

This damn cat Leonard is done change his attitude. He's outside all day long an' the only thing he say to me when he comes inside is "I want some freak'n food". He don't jump up in my lap no more an' if'n he do, he's only there for a couple minutes. His curfew is 7pm, what he trys his darndest to make it to 9pm. Then he says...."I want some freak'n food". An' goes to sleep.

Got me some real problems with the "billy jeep". The battery is fully charged. I start it up an' it go crazy.....Rrrrrrrrr, Rrrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr......2500 rpm all it do. Then I shut it down. Restart....it don't start. I checks connections under the hood....wiggle everthing. Don't fix a thing. With the Rrrrrr, Rrrrrr, Rrrrrr I'm think'n along the lines of "it ain't git'n enough fuel"....fuel pump. Does Jeeps have a fuel filter???
Yup it does....an' it take a special tool to remove an' replace. Grrrrrrr. An' the filter cost almost half a hunnet dollar. Grrrrrrr.

Ok, while the engine was run'n, I turn on the heat. "What the hell????"....fog come out the vents. Smell just like antifreeze. The heater core has got a hole in it. Google google google, I can git it fix for $800. The dashboard has to be removed. For me, that would be a 2 day affair, an' then it has to be all put back together. I ain't do'n that. I'll bypass the heater an' freeze my ass off before I pull a dashboard. Do ya think a 2001 Jeep Grand Cherokee Limited will fit in a dumpster? I know I should have bought one them little Jeeps what never break down. Grrrrrrrr.

I was sit'n here think'n last night...."how the hell am I gonna get back to Texas"? The way things are go'n, I'm almost too skeered to crank up an' head that way. Remember a year ago the most stressful trip I ever make go'n back to Texas? That was all due to a faulty ignition switch what was burn up. With my health issues, things just don't add up. I need a freak'n driver....nurse an' cook.

Ok, I know I ain't said nuttin excit'n or nuttin like that, but at least I said something. Would be great if'n I could get back to writ'n bout adventures instead of whinn'n bout this kind of stuff. Kind of reminds me of the year that everwhere I traveled, it rained 5 gallon buckets full when I got there.

Ok, see's ya laters......  

"Oh my God, Billy Bob ain't dead"

Ha, today I have absolutely nuttin I want to do....although there is a hunnert things what need done. But...I ain't gonna do 'em. Do ya know how long it would take me to do a hunnert things???

Yesterday I went to the doctor. The stomach doctor. It was as I had expected, she prescribed me a new medicine for the erosion's in my stomach an' tells me "don't take no more them laxative pills". That was it. Oh wait, my hoarse voice, she say that happens sometimes from a endoscopy. She ain't gonna do nuttin bout it an' she caused it. "Gargle" she tell me...with salt water. Damn, that would mean a trip to south Texas an' the Gulf of Mexico. An' no guarantee salt water will fix it.

Then me an' "yo mama" heads off to a K-Mart what is closing. Everthing is discounted either 10 or 20%. Sounds good don't it? Well that was a lie. The workers was tak'n the K-Mart price tags off'n everthing...what is 30 to 40% lower than suggested price. Then ya get yourself a 10 to 20% discount off'n suggested price. An' people was com'n out of there with buggies full of discounted stuff. I'm think'n common core math is involved. I bought nuttin.

While trasp'n through the store look'n at the wounderful discounted prices, my freak'n hip went out. I almost go to the floor....thank ya K-Mart buggy....my walker. Then when I get to the truck, I cain't raise my right leg to get in. A nice guy help me. Ha ha, then I wait for a hour for "yo mama" to finish her shop'n.

We pick up some Whoppers an' fries an' head back home. Whopper an' fries make me sick....'my God, that never happen before. Oh wait, yes it did. Back in Deming. in 2008, me Sadie Mae an' Lug Nut head off to the mountains to do a little gold prospect'n. Ha, that was a waisted trip, I find nuttin. Back in Deming I stop at What-a-Burger and get me a double meat Whopper an' large fries. Boy howdy was I ever full. Then the pains started...."I eat too much". But that weren't the case. I was hav'n me a heart attack an' didn't know it. "Pesky neighbor" Wayne take me to the hospital at 9:30pm. Nurse tell me that 500mg aspirin probly save my life. The rest the story you already know...triple bypass. It's been all downhill ever since.

Has it been cold. Well yeah it's been cold....but I'm surviv'n it just fine. It's nice an' warm in "da house". Low temps have been in the lower 20's to lower 30's. Day time temps anywheres from upper 30's a couple days to upper 50's other days. Ain't nuttin wrong with that...as long as I'm not outside.

For 2 critters what don't get along, they look pretty comfortable in this pic.

In other news...."billy jeep" may have to go to the Jeep doctor for test'n. I went out an' crank it up an' everthing sound perfect. That is for bout 5 minutes. Then the damn thing go ape shit....won't go past 2500 rpm.....rrrrrrrm, rmmmm, rmmmm...that all it do. Turn key off an' restart...everything sound perfect. Something ain't right.

Ok, that's it for this post. Ain't a thing go'n on to write about....see ya laters.
 

D problems ever end????....not at my house

Ha ha, more problems. It was right at 6 weeks ago when I buyed a brand spank'n new propane tank an' fill it up with 28 gallons of propane. It's [this] close to empty. Ok, where the hell did all my propane go to? I've used the Mr Heater when it got really cold, but not enough to burn up 28 gallons of propane. The water heater has been "on" all this time....while I was work'n on it. If there was a propane leak, somebody would have smelled it. I've kind of sorta calculated useage an' I don't come nowheres close to 28 gallons. The Mr Heater close to 10 or 12 gallons an' the water heater maybe 2 gallons. Will be check'n for leaks again after the installation of new piping for the Mr Heater move.

Then to top that off, my freak'n coffee pot gave up the ghost this morn'n. It brew up bout a quarter pot an' "die". Time for another Amazon order. But first I'll pull a Billy Bob....take that sucker apart an' see what the problem is. Maybe a fix.

The nice warm weather also give up the ghost. Last night the wind was a blow'n up a storm an' the temp went down a few degs. For the next week or so we gonna have some more very very low temps....lower 20's night time an' mid 50's day time. That sucks. And YES, that's very very low temps. But, I'm gonna make it.

Leonard is taller than Sadie Mae. They was stand'n next to each other an' I says..."what the hell, Leonard is taller than Sadie Mae". He don't weigh as much as Sadie Mae, but he is a big cat. Think'n close to 12 pounds now....even with his diet I put him on. One cup a day is all he gets. Unless he is catch'n birds an' eat'n 'em. He is a hunter ya know, as most cats are. He is also no longer a indoor cat. He loves it outside, even when it's cold an' wet out there. Silly cat. His curfew is 7pm....what he don't like one bit.

I'm still feel'n pretty good, but not good enough to be driv'n no motorhome a thousand mile to south Texas. The ol' stomach is act'n up again, but still not as bad as before. Rekon I'm gonna have to get back on my stomach meds an' deal with the side effects. Damn I hate that idea. Back an' hip bout the same....hurt like hell all the time. Come on back doctor appointment. Hmmmm, I wonder if'n ALL doctors are quacks?

Speak'n of doctors. Remember when I posted bout get'n a endoscopy? At the time, Gypsy commented bout one she had years ago what made her voice harsh. Well, the same thing happen to the old Billy Bob. It's very hard for me to talk to anybody. An' when I do, my voice is very raspy. That sucks when ya got something important to say. Will discuss with the endoscopy doc next appointment date. I wonder if'n ya can sue a doctor for chang'n your voice?

Ok, I take the bottom off'n the coffee pot. All the little devices check out Ok, got 115 volts to the heating element....but it don't get hot. Do a continuity check on the heating element. Yup, it ain't got no continuity,,,,open circuit. Now what kind (brand) coffee pot should I order from Amazon? The newer Mr Coffee is a 12 cupper, humungest (great big), an' I don't want no great big 12 cupper coffee pot.....I want 8 cups with a stainless steel pot thingy.  

Boy howdy, this Chris Craft boat sure is collect'n a lot of dust just sit'n on a shelf. At this point, I have no desire to work on the damn thing. I am [this] close to complet'n the project....what the hell?

Speak'n of computers....have ya ever cuss a computer? The new Dell computer is really got the old Billy Bob all piss off. Cuss that sucker. I be online do'n something, an' the damn thing lock slap up. Got to do a cold start an' start all over. So I now have one computer what lock up all the time an' another that the X don't work, the CD don't work an' the camera card reader don't work. Think'n I'll take this one (Dell) back to Best Buy an' get it fixed....under warranty. The Toshiba, the fixes would probly cost more than a new laptop. The non work'n X be'n my main concern. Hmmmm, wonder if'n I can disable the keyboard an' reinstall it to fix the X? May try that just for the hell of it.

Ok, that's bout all I have to talk bout today. See ya laters.