Boy howdy....I see sunshine peek'n in my winders. Been a while ya know. With the sunshine, I see work. Outside stuff. Sit on "da porch an' sip a cup....do some think'n. It's a beautiful day.
Yesterdays post turned out to be hours of fond memories of years gone by. And I had only touched the surface of my four plus years of sailing the seas. Touching the unbeknownst (not known), my mind wandered back to the torpedo incident during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Come on Google, do yer thang. Nowhere could be found that validated my story. But....to my surprise, I learned that in the same waters we were operating, were 4 Russian submarines that were carrying nuclear torpedoes. And.....with orders from Russian government officials...or what ever, the Captains were to arm and use these torpedoes at their own discretion if under attack. I didn't know that.
I caught myself up in a little lie in my post.... more research ya know. Our engineering efficiency evaluation earned us another 'red' hashmark on the stack, not a gold one. My jumping up and down was exaggerated ever so slightly. Even as a youngster of 21 years old, there was a little bit of "Billy Bob" in me.
Have ya ever been skeered? Oh, I ain't talk'n bout somebody com'n up behind ya an' scream'n at ya wheres ya jump slap out your shoes. I'm talk'n bout skeered of what the future holds for ya. Tomorrow, next week, next year....that kind of stuff. I been hang'n round Deming for so long that my feet have got roots grow'n out them. Dig'n up roots ain't easy ya know. Where am I gonna go? What am I gonna do? That what scares hell right out me. I'm gonna be alone again. Most the places I used to travel to, everybody is either dead, in old folks homes or just drifted away. I'm too old to be hang'n out in sleazy bars with little hoochie coochie girls. Although, little hoochie coockies can perk ya right up no matter how old ya are. Make ya feel young again, wanna dance, get slop ass drunk, fall down the steps an' brake a hip. "Damn Billy Bob, ya gonna do that"???
Time is get'n shorter every day. My nerves are on edge. Got so much to do. Pick them tools up. Where the hell is my couch? Dumpster run. Wash them dirty winders. Wheeeewww! Tired already...."da porch time.
?
Monday, November 14, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
A sailors life....
"Dog gone it Billy Bob, ya got to splain stuff better. You didn't go to Viet Nam, but your ship did". When ya leave half the story out, people will tend to get the wrong impression.
Ya see, old Billy Bob is pretty much a patriotic kind a guy when it come to the US of A, our military and our veterans. At times I can become downright fight'n mad when people refuse to recognize our service men and women. It was them what has kept America free for all these years.
I had just arrived by way of a great big ol' Greyhoud bus from Ft. Worth, Texas to boot camp San Diego, Ca. in October, 1961. We was stand'n at attention, as best we knowed how, facing old glory wav'n in the breeze. A mighty fine sight if do I say so myself. It was time for colors, the lowering of our flag at sundown, the stars and stripes. The National Anthem is played through the loud speakers, the flag slowly lowered and folded ever so neatly. I were stand'n there shak'n in my boots....tears come to my eyes....I could hardy contain myself. I were officially in the US Navy wear'n a pair of old raggedy jeans, tee shirt and long ass flow'n brown hair with highlights of the Texas sun.....what they cut slap off the next day.....right down to the skin....bald, that what I were.
My first ship was a Forrest Sherman class destroyer out of Norfolk, Va., USS DuPont DD-941, commissioned 1957. Almost a brand spank'n new war machine.
There were some thrilling days aboard this ship. I was shipboard electrician, fix'n stuff ya know, in a crew of 318 crusty sailors. In 1962 we outfitted at Guantanamo Bay for Russian sub searching off Cuba's coast during the Cuban Crisis. It was a boring job, but someone had to do it. While tracking a submarine somewhere south of Cube we encountered a "fish" swimm'n a hunnert mile a hour right straight at us....missing our fantail within 50 feet. To this day I still believe it was a torpedo, but I think it's classified information....kept secret from public eye. All eye witnesses were questioned in the Captains quarters. It was determined at that time, this was no living ocean creature. We requested from higher authorities, the Admirals flagship, to "bring up" that sub by depth charge attack. Our request was denied by higher up in Washington DC. Go figger!!!
Steaming in single file through the Gibraltar Straights on a Mediterranean Cruise, we lost all steering control....the rudders ceased to work. Hand cranking was required and old Billy Bob was put to crank'n a manual steering device. How comes an electrician has to steer the damn ship? I check fuses an' stuff ya know.
During a yearly engineering efficiency evaluation test, I was assigned to the #1 switchboard. I knowed how to operate that switchboard like it were a part of me......knowed every switch an' breaker, parallel them generators without the blink of a light....I were good on that switchboard. But then....being I was a silly guy, I decided to be a little bit "redneck" and make a complete fool of myself. Make all them hi rank'n officers think ol' Billy Bob some kind of idiot. They says..."fire in #1 generator". That when I comes alive....jump'n up an' down, run'n round like a chicken with his head cut off...hit'n buttons, turn'n switches, hit that emergency stop steam valve....bring #1 switchboard back on line in less than 30 seconds. Allotted time was 1 minute....score 100% for Billy Bob. Never make a single mistake. Although I did get a good ass chew'n from the engineering officer for jeopardizing our chances of another gold hash mark on the stacks.
Then one time #2 switchboard catch fire. We had just tied up in some island port in the Caribbean. I were in anticipation for liberty call when it happen. Down the ladder I go....into the darkness of the aft engine room, hit'n switchs an' stuff....blinded by the smoke. Transfer all critical electrical load to #1 switchboard. By the time the fire was out, temps in the engine room had climbed to 140 degs, and all systems were go. Old Billy Bob was sop'n wet with sweat. That when I jump ship....take me a swim to cool off. "But Billy Bob....ya don't know how to swim". Almost drown flap'n round in that water like a cat fall in a mud hole.
Then I decides to transfer to another ship. Leave the easy life behind and check into the "Holiday USS Canberra".
Another story for a different time.
I'll leave you now to contemplate if this story is for real or fiction.
Ya see, old Billy Bob is pretty much a patriotic kind a guy when it come to the US of A, our military and our veterans. At times I can become downright fight'n mad when people refuse to recognize our service men and women. It was them what has kept America free for all these years.
I had just arrived by way of a great big ol' Greyhoud bus from Ft. Worth, Texas to boot camp San Diego, Ca. in October, 1961. We was stand'n at attention, as best we knowed how, facing old glory wav'n in the breeze. A mighty fine sight if do I say so myself. It was time for colors, the lowering of our flag at sundown, the stars and stripes. The National Anthem is played through the loud speakers, the flag slowly lowered and folded ever so neatly. I were stand'n there shak'n in my boots....tears come to my eyes....I could hardy contain myself. I were officially in the US Navy wear'n a pair of old raggedy jeans, tee shirt and long ass flow'n brown hair with highlights of the Texas sun.....what they cut slap off the next day.....right down to the skin....bald, that what I were.
My first ship was a Forrest Sherman class destroyer out of Norfolk, Va., USS DuPont DD-941, commissioned 1957. Almost a brand spank'n new war machine.
Steaming in single file through the Gibraltar Straights on a Mediterranean Cruise, we lost all steering control....the rudders ceased to work. Hand cranking was required and old Billy Bob was put to crank'n a manual steering device. How comes an electrician has to steer the damn ship? I check fuses an' stuff ya know.
During a yearly engineering efficiency evaluation test, I was assigned to the #1 switchboard. I knowed how to operate that switchboard like it were a part of me......knowed every switch an' breaker, parallel them generators without the blink of a light....I were good on that switchboard. But then....being I was a silly guy, I decided to be a little bit "redneck" and make a complete fool of myself. Make all them hi rank'n officers think ol' Billy Bob some kind of idiot. They says..."fire in #1 generator". That when I comes alive....jump'n up an' down, run'n round like a chicken with his head cut off...hit'n buttons, turn'n switches, hit that emergency stop steam valve....bring #1 switchboard back on line in less than 30 seconds. Allotted time was 1 minute....score 100% for Billy Bob. Never make a single mistake. Although I did get a good ass chew'n from the engineering officer for jeopardizing our chances of another gold hash mark on the stacks.
Then one time #2 switchboard catch fire. We had just tied up in some island port in the Caribbean. I were in anticipation for liberty call when it happen. Down the ladder I go....into the darkness of the aft engine room, hit'n switchs an' stuff....blinded by the smoke. Transfer all critical electrical load to #1 switchboard. By the time the fire was out, temps in the engine room had climbed to 140 degs, and all systems were go. Old Billy Bob was sop'n wet with sweat. That when I jump ship....take me a swim to cool off. "But Billy Bob....ya don't know how to swim". Almost drown flap'n round in that water like a cat fall in a mud hole.
Then I decides to transfer to another ship. Leave the easy life behind and check into the "Holiday USS Canberra".
Another story for a different time.
I'll leave you now to contemplate if this story is for real or fiction.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Lost memories....
Have ya ever sit down and wonder what happen to all them old memories of yesteryear? Your childhood, adolescence, teens, young adult, loves of your life, the waning years. Holy cows, everyone should be able to write a book. But what do ya do when ya start lose'n them memories? Are they lost forever in a clouded mind?
It weren't but a few short years ago when old Billy Bob had a clear unclouded mind, membered everything from early childhood up the present day activities and unactivities (I jist make up that word). But where have they gone now that I no longer have that clear and unclouded mind? "Well holy crap Billy Bob, did ya ever think bout writ'n them memories down on a piece of paper"?
About 10 year ago I started a book. It were bout the wonderful memories of my life....good times, bad times, experiences, adventures and misadventures. I wrote stuff down as I remembered them. I laughed and I cried. Then I started blogg'n, tell'n my stories for the whole world to see. It's not a well written autobiography, but it's my story. It's my life. It's true accounts, not fiction as some may believe. Although, I do doctor up some my stories to bring humor and a few laughs along the way, what by no means, does this take away from the truth of the original thought.
Yesterday I come across a blog what really piss me off. Our Veterans were likened to and berated below septic tank cleaners....a total disgraceful respect to those that lost their lives, were maimed, lost limbs...fought for the freedoms we enjoy today. What goes through the mind of such a person? Hope to hell he reads this.
It weren't but a few short years ago when old Billy Bob had a clear unclouded mind, membered everything from early childhood up the present day activities and unactivities (I jist make up that word). But where have they gone now that I no longer have that clear and unclouded mind? "Well holy crap Billy Bob, did ya ever think bout writ'n them memories down on a piece of paper"?
About 10 year ago I started a book. It were bout the wonderful memories of my life....good times, bad times, experiences, adventures and misadventures. I wrote stuff down as I remembered them. I laughed and I cried. Then I started blogg'n, tell'n my stories for the whole world to see. It's not a well written autobiography, but it's my story. It's my life. It's true accounts, not fiction as some may believe. Although, I do doctor up some my stories to bring humor and a few laughs along the way, what by no means, does this take away from the truth of the original thought.
USS Canberra CAG-2...Viet Nam bound
One of four US warships I served to secure our freedoms. (Oct. 1961 - April 1966)Yesterday I come across a blog what really piss me off. Our Veterans were likened to and berated below septic tank cleaners....a total disgraceful respect to those that lost their lives, were maimed, lost limbs...fought for the freedoms we enjoy today. What goes through the mind of such a person? Hope to hell he reads this.
Friday, November 11, 2011
4 hours later....
Boy howdy let me tell ya, this computer is gonna bite the dust yet. Ya see, I were writ'n a post.....well let me go back a little further than that. Been lock'n up almost every morn'n what I just start the damn thing right back up. Now this morn'n before I even read half the blogs, it lock up tighter an' a drum. The when all is well again, I gets a blue screen. Then after that all fix, it start reboot'n all by it self....I swear I never touch nuttin. Then I tries to boot up in safe mode.....it boot in regular lock up mode again. Finally I were able to do a "restore". Pheeewww....now it work'n again. It go'n a hunnert mile a hour in second gear. Burn'n rubber an' stuff.
Now what the hell were I say'n bout a blog post? Oh yeah...had me a good'un all write up....that when everything lock up. All that good funny stuff is gone.....poooof, just like that. Not only from the computer, but from my mind. "Well shoot Billy Bob, ain't no sense try'n to post nuttin funny.....that computer stuff is funny enough to last a week".
Oh yeah, I member one thing what I had posted...or write about. My romp'n stomp'n 500 watt winder shak'n sound system. It ain't like I gonna pester my neighbors on purpose ...shake their winders an' stuff, or nuttin like that. But I do like to share. Was listen to Baconhoven, Bratch an' Mooseheart yesterday, turn up purty loud an' here come the neighbors.....sit on "da porch" stomp'n feet to the beat. Had us a regular ol' longhair hoedown. Then when I crank on the cajun, they was say'n...."turn it up".
Now what the hell were I say'n bout a blog post? Oh yeah...had me a good'un all write up....that when everything lock up. All that good funny stuff is gone.....poooof, just like that. Not only from the computer, but from my mind. "Well shoot Billy Bob, ain't no sense try'n to post nuttin funny.....that computer stuff is funny enough to last a week".
Oh yeah, I member one thing what I had posted...or write about. My romp'n stomp'n 500 watt winder shak'n sound system. It ain't like I gonna pester my neighbors on purpose ...shake their winders an' stuff, or nuttin like that. But I do like to share. Was listen to Baconhoven, Bratch an' Mooseheart yesterday, turn up purty loud an' here come the neighbors.....sit on "da porch" stomp'n feet to the beat. Had us a regular ol' longhair hoedown. Then when I crank on the cajun, they was say'n...."turn it up".
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Winter blues
I get them winter blues every year as soon as the temps drop below 55 degs, what in some parts of the country 55 degs. is a spring day. But one more degree under 55 degs, water gonna freeze. I ain't gonna go outside and sit on "da porch" sip'n a cup when it get this cold. You gonna find old Billy Bob sit' inside where it warm. I ain't stupit ya know.
Deming has felt the first winter freezes for the last few days. It's been get'n into the upper 20's come bout daylight. And I still have 3 weeks till departure. Or something like that. Gonna take a week to ten days to get my couch back.....and then, I got a yard full of stuff to pick up what I throwed off the roof from the solar panel installation. Table saw, chain saw, 2x4's, sledge hammers....stuff like that. Still have some storage bins to go through......dumpster bout another hunnert pound of junk. Neighbor just wait'n for me to hit the "tool shed" (compartment). He know I gonna be toss'n stuff.
Oh Boy Howdy....let me tell ya......got that 500 watt sound system all hook up. YES!!!! That what I'm talk'n bout. Shake some winders. In order to shake the winders on my neighbors house I got to crank it up full bore. At half throttle it shake my winders just fine....vibrate stuff. Now I got to go out and buy me some them "rap" cd's......lol, that's funny, Billy Bob listen to rap....right!
Deming has felt the first winter freezes for the last few days. It's been get'n into the upper 20's come bout daylight. And I still have 3 weeks till departure. Or something like that. Gonna take a week to ten days to get my couch back.....and then, I got a yard full of stuff to pick up what I throwed off the roof from the solar panel installation. Table saw, chain saw, 2x4's, sledge hammers....stuff like that. Still have some storage bins to go through......dumpster bout another hunnert pound of junk. Neighbor just wait'n for me to hit the "tool shed" (compartment). He know I gonna be toss'n stuff.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Not sure...
Nope, don't know if I wanna do it. Make a blog post is what I'm talk'n bout. I look over there on the right at the blogs I follow an' some ain't made a post in a hunnert year. Then I looks at my followers list an' I ain't see some of them in a hunnert year too. What I'm say'n is I miss these people. They are an inspiration to my ability to write a bunch of nonsense.
So, no nonsense today. I'm gonna be serious as a rock. Write something that can't be construed as fiction.
*think'n....think'n....think'n....*
One hour later:
Well that didn't work, so I gonna dig up some more nonsense. Let me see....did I ever tell ya bout the time??? No, that ain't gonna work either....done tole that story a hunnert time.
Ya see, here what's happen'n, I'm runn'n slap out of stories. That what happen when ya live a bor'n life....sit'n on "da porch", sip'n a cup an' think'n....what I been do'n the last couple year. Maybe I better take a trip to town. Go to Walmart....something exciting always happen'n there....right!!!
Boy howdy, old Billy Bob is get'n pissed. All them flies ..... crawl up my nose an' stuff like that when I'm napp'n. Damn!!!
Ok....off to town. May or may not ever come back.
I'm back....ain't nuttin happen. Well ya there was. Went by the upholstery shop and look at the material for my couch. Damn....is that what I ordered? Better take ma a before pic before I forget.
20 minutes later......all gone.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Blow up.....boat
I hadn't been work'n for The University of Texas very long, so not many of the other employees knew bout Billy Bob. Just a "straight" guy do'n his job. Quiet, restrained and ordinary. That's what they thought.
The supers office was on the second floor with a little balcony walkway outside. Once a week we had an employee meeting in that little office....bout 10 of us. We was the maintenance crew ya know. Fix stuff what ain't broke.
In the boat crew was another Billy Bob "wannabe"....do crazy stuff, dangerous. He's the guy what was cleaning the insides of a enclosed boat with acetone.....a very highly flammable concoction of aircraft fuel, 180 grain pure alcohol, and TNT. He smoked. Lit him up one with a Bic and ....KA-BOOOM...smoke an' flames...he were lay'n on da ground. Hair all burn up, clothes smolder'n an' that smoke still clinched between his swoled up lips.
Well anyhows, this questionable boat feller an' old Billy Bob gets our heads together an' plan for a little innocent prank on supervisor. A 6 man co/2 inflate life boat was toted up to the second floor office in one neat little package. Rigging was attached to the "inflate" lever and tied to the doorknob. I think you get'n the picture here.....open door, little 6 man life raft blow up into a full size 5 foots by 12 foots boat in less than 5 seconds. Well, that exactly what happen....just like that. The supervisor opened his office door, only to find....to his surprise, a rapidly inflating, room filling, big ass boat. He start back peddling....two stepp'n...turn white like a sheet....no where to go. He backs into the handrail....he starts over....oh my God, he gonna die when he hit that pavement below. Now had he went all the way over that handrail, what saved his life, I wouldn't be writ'n this story.....I would probably still be in jail for premeditated 1st degree murder. No more pranks were performed on second story buildings. Ground level from now on.
Ok, one more harmless prank. Supervisor and da plumber was work'n on a electric steam generator. Ain't neither one of them knowed squat bout 230 volt electric stuff, so this is gonna be a pack of fun. Ya see, old Billy Bob had some his M-80 firecrackers in his pocket what he pick up in Tennessee last year. They was hook'n up wires, wipe'n sweat from their brows.....they was intense an' in deep thought. So intense that they failed to see the Billy Bob sneak up an' slip a big ol' M-80 up under that high voltage steam generator. Then I just stands there, real innocent like, fresh lit up smoke in hand, just wait'n for one them to turn on that switch. What they did. I touches my smoke to the fuse and quietly walk off.....KA-BOOOOM. Back peddle, two stepp'n...fall'n over each other. YEE HAAA....old Billy Bob strikes again. Yes, the maintenance shop at The University of Texas was a dangerous place to work. Remember the "jet powered bbq pit"??? Yes....dangerous.
Billy Bob been deep in thought way too much lately. It were just yesterday I were sit'n there on the couch sip'n a cup and got to think'n..."what if ya spend the winter in south Texas"? Yeah I know, I just got back from a Texas trip. But I didn't catch up no fish for the freezer. I breaks out my Rand McNalley GPS travel device (atlas) an' start a plan for a exciting adventure to south Texas. Two weeks here, two weeks there...before ya know it, it's spring time again. No snow. No freez'n to death. Only warm sunshiny days for lay'n back an' enjoy'n life. As Barney would say..."hav'n toooo much fun". Again....not set in stone ya know.
I've decided this is a good the time to "get out of dodge"....Deming that is. I've had it. Don't like it here no more. Too windy. Too cold. Too hot. Nuttin to do....bored. "But, but, but....what bout all yer stuff Billy Bob"? What stuff...."da porch" an' some junk?? It's paid for and no big loss. Maybe put a for sale sign on the highway...."da porch for sale" and dumpster the rest. Again....not set in stone ya know.
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