They got away

Well shoot....I ain't got nuttin to write about.

Did I ever tell ya bout the time.....I were liv'n on the farm and we six kids walked 3 1/2 mile to school. Well, last time I were in Missouri, I went to the old farm house and the old school house. The old farm house is still there but the old school house ain't.... 'cept'n for the foundation and basement. Burn to the ground way back in bout '49 or "50. In my motor home I have a piece of the roof gutter what I fount lay'n on the ground. In the middle of the basement was an old coal furnace what kept us warm in the winter. Most of it is still there. Out on a big ol' tree is the remnants of the rope swing still tied to that limb.

That old rope swing bring back the memories of when I were a daredevil...evil Billy Bob. I would swing that thing till the teacher yell..."Billy, git out that swing". That when I do my evil jump...fly through the air like superman. Well them sissy boys dare me one time to jump out the other way....downhill. What I did. I were yell'n.... "mom's....I'm bleed'n". I skeer't that teacher lady plumb to death. I tored my brand spank'n new homemade shirt, skin't up my elbows and had a rooster egg bump on my head.

Then fish's just ain't gonna get in my fry pan. I sit out there all day long put'n on more bait and throw'n it back out. Two fishes gobbled up on my line and headed for the cat tail reeds. That were the last time I see them. I 'spect they were somewheres round 5 pounds or more....and old Billy Bob knows what he talk'n bout.
Big'uns always get away. Ask any fisherman.

Finish off the spaghetti tonight since there weren't no fish to cook up. Even had enough for Lug Nut and Sadie Mae. Hope they don't poot all night long.

Speak'n of poot'n.....I were mind'n my own business in Walmart one time when I got this urge. I turn down this aisle where there weren't no people. Gonna let off a little quiet one. Well, ya know what gonna happen. That right....I rip a loud one....like a trumpet. Two old ladies had just come round the corner and one says to the other..."did you fart"? Hehehehe....I were gone.....pooot....just like that. Me and girlfriend was eat'n at this really nice "greasy spoon" when I got the urge.....let it out easy Billy Bob. Nope...Billy Bob don't do nuttin easy. Then I just lean back and look at girlfriend with that "did you fart?" look. Everyone else was look'n at her too. Boy howdy did I pay for that one.

Ok...I'm done...out of here!!!