I were just a kid

All my life has been spent in childish dreams and outdoor adventure stuff. Never was one to be cooped up in "da house" try'n to figger out something to get into. I got into stuff as a kid. Not your every day "ring round da posy" stuff neither. I were out for adventure. Danger, blood let'n stuff.

At 6 years old, I was a seasoned cow puppy rider. Ya see, old momma cow had done dropped her a young'un on the ground a couple days ago. Cute little bugger too. But for a adventurous 6 year old bull rider, cute had never entered my mind. I were gonna ride that thing, come rain or shine, do or die. Did me some "sweet talk" to that cow puppy fore it trusted me enough to get anywheres close to my "mount a cow puppy" area. Momma cows watchful eye on me all the time. Well, I jumps slap dab right in the middle that cow puppys back and all hell break loose.....just like that. Come straight up off the ground with all fours. I were hang'n on for dear life. That cow puppy give me a ride I never figgered on. Dump me head first to the ground....right in all that squishy cow poop an' fresh pee water. And then, here come that momma cow, head down an' snort'n like a bull ox in a china shop. That cow were pissed I mean to tell ya.....an' I were cut'n a trail fast I can for the fence. I sees barbed wire in front me and there a mad charg'n momma cow right behind me. Up under that fence I shot like a skeered rabbit. Tored a big ol' hole in my "farmer John" bib overalls...and a big ol' bleed'n gash on my butt cheek. That when "Moms" break out the alcohol and iodine, what I were already accustomed to by this time in my life. Think's I got a good ass whoop'n too. But none that deterred "little Billy" from finding adventure on the farm.

I were lay'n in bed last night an' happen to look out the winder. The sky was plumb full of stars. That's a good sign ya know, that the sun gonna shine when I get up in the morn'n. Go down to the lake an' catch me up some fish. Uh huh, think again Einstein. It's freak'n cold out there and the sky is full of clouds. You ain't go'n no wheres.

Just when I think Blogger is got it's stuff together and everything is work'n right, it ain't. There been so many people chang'n their settings that now I have to spend half a day try'n to make a few comments. One guy has changed his settings so much that when I finally make a comment, it get automatic deleted. If'n ya leave stuff alone, it gonna fix itself. For those not in the know, it's the new comments style that is screw'n things up. By new I mean, comment to a comment...reply to any comment of your choos'n. Some blogs have it, some don't. It's the ones that do what causes the "white pages"...redirect. 

Speak'n of javelinas, did I ever tell ya bout the time....Vickie Lynn, my first mate, got herself stumb'n drunk on vodka an' orange soda and go outside to feed the herd of javelina what was root'n round in the yard. These  innocent look'n little pigs may be cute an' harmless look'n, but they ain't. There was warnings all over the park...."DON'T FEED THE JAVELINAS". Ha, like Vickie Lynn gonna heed to any stink'n warnings. By the way, she weren't out there very long. She come in the motorhome like I went under that fence. A hunnert mile a hour.


Oh, before I forget, remember that 15 beans soup I made yesterday. Boy howdy, let me tell ya. Not only was it an outstand'n pot of beans, it were one root'n toot'n concoction what worked overtime half ways through the night. Wonder if'n them javelinas would like some leftovers? Have me a bunch of root'n an' toot'n javelinas out in the yard.