Fireworks....Yeee haa

The elusive green jays.....or what ever.

Holy crap, there was explosions everwhere last night. I ain't talk'n bout wait'n round for midnight to roll in a new year, I'm talk'n  bout soon the sun go down an' git dark. There was big ol' explosions, shoot'n stars, bottle rockets, colorful displays, shotguns, 30 round clips, pistols, assault rifles, some even sounded like a sticks of dynamite. Poor Sadie Mae cuddled up next to me shak'n in her boots.

Falcon Heights, Texas ain't a big place (Population in 2010: 53. Population change since 2000: -84.2%), so where the hell they get all these explosives? These people ain't got no money to be spend'n on fireworks. They need pinto beans an' tortillas. Then I got to think'n......have ya ever been to a fireworks stand an' see who buys the big stuff? It sure ain't the women folk I can bet ya a dollar on that. It's men....macho redneck men. "Hey, watch this" kind of guys. Ain't no little pixie dust sparkle thingys what ya hold in your hand for these guys, I'm talk'n mortar rounds....TNT, napalm, hand held missile launchers...stuff like that.

I had me a neighbor one time what love his fireworks. Go to the fireworks sell'n place and buy big ol' boxes of 'em. Spend a whole paycheck. Take 'em home and start sort'n 'em out on the kitchen table. Carefully examining each and every piece with loving care.....eyes all a glow. That's what ya call "hands on" experience. He have sparkles in his eyes....a big grin on his face. By the time it was dark enough, he was all syked up, ready to blow stuff to kingdom come, sending chills and hysteria throughout the neighborhood. My kind a guy!!!!

What does a guy do when go'n outside is out of the question. I'm talk'n a travel'n man. A boondocker. No electricity or modern day conveniences.....an' it's freez'n cold. Well I'll tell ya what the old Billy Bob do. He sits on his ass over there on the couch. Sometimes think'n, day dream'n, sometimes writ'n stuff down in a notebook and other times read'n western paperback books. I got me bout 300 of 'em if'n ya didn't know. Good 'uns too. With a shortage of electricity there ain't a whole bunch you can do. Ya gotta conserve. Watch'n TV is questionable unless you are proficient in the Mexican dialect, as all the stations are broadcast in Mexican in the area. So, until there is some decent weather, Billy Bob is destined to spend his days "do'n nuttin".....inside. But shoot, I ain't got nuttin else to do. Fish ain't bite'n.

Well shoot, the OFM Barney rolled out early this morning. Headed north of all places. Barney don't stay around much when he gets bored. Always on the go....."hav'n tooo much fun".  See ya down the road a piece Barney. Keep them golf'n sticks tuned up. Buy ya a boat like the "bubba boat".

Ok....I lied. It's gonna be freak'n super cold here in south Texas. Down to freez'n in a couple days. I'm think'n something ain't right. I made me special plans to be at Falcon Lake for the winter 'cause it don't get cold here. Where I get that idea from??? If'n I could, I would move farther south, but then I would be in Mexico. An' everbody know, I can't go to Mexico (red tagged ya know).  "Hey Billy Bob, ya could move over to the State Park....all the electricity ya could ever want....stay nice an' warm". Maybe I just might do that. Gotta think bout it.  

Life is good when you're hav'n fun......an' other times too.