Dang, I broke my big toe. That what I thought anyhows. Ya see, bout 5:30 this morn'n I notice it were cold in "da house", 64 degs. My feet were cold stick'n out the bottom of my "summer" blankie. I got a cramp in my secondary leg. That's the left one ya know. I scramble out of bed....fall flat on my ass. In the process, my right big toe slam head long into the hardwood floor. I hear a crack, or what sound like a crack an' my big toe start scream'n in pain. I cain't get up...."where's the beef" or something like that. My left leg is still got a cramp in it an' the right one ain't work'n. I crawls down the hall, voic'n my opinion....cuss'n words an' stuff, an' grabs holt to the bathroom door handle thingy for leverage.
Well, I might as well stay up since I hobbled my way to the kitchen. Brewed me up a pot, sit down on the couch sip'n up a cup....an' hugged my big toe. By now, 8am, if'n it was broked, it would be as big as a sore thumb. But it ain't. I won't be do'n no hikes in the woods today.
One other reason I won't be do'n no hikes today....it's rain'n. I'm tell'n ya right now, weather has got a thing against us older people. I remember back when I was just a little tyke, if'n it rained, we was out in it play'n all sorts of fun games. Splash'n through mud puddles....barefooted, stuff like that. Get all sop'n wet. "Moms" holler'n, "Billy, get out of that mud puddle fore I wear you out". Rain was good back then.
Bout 3 or 4....maybe 5 year ago, rain follow me around everwhere I go. I were under a black cloud that year. I went to the "slabs" to spend the winter. It rained. My front yard was a lake.....what was named "Lake Billy Bob". NOTE! Somewhere's is a whole year of lost photos....gone, pooof, just like that. Well, I guess I have no proof of my own lake. Maybe in a earlier blog. I'll check an' get back with ya.
See....I tole you I would find it.
But anyhows, that year rain was my worst enemy. I would travel mile after mile in beautiful weather, set up camp somewheres, an' the next day it would rain all holy hell. Some were just a little gusher shower.....bout half a inch, something like that. Just enough to make mud pies an' float a boat. Others were torrential....ya don't even wanna think bout go'n outside. It happened every where I went that year....2007 or 08 I think it was. Rain sucks.
I were sit'n there on the couch watch'n golf. Sadie Mae says...."HEY WAKE UP, what's for supper"? How bout a big ol' pot of Billy Bob Beef Stew Soup?
That's bout two gallon of soup in that there pot. Tastes pretty good if'n I do say so myself. Ain't the best, but it'll do. Sadie Mae says it's excellent.....long as it ain't got no dry dog kibbles in it.
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4pm update:
Ok, I think I may have made a poor diagnosis of my poor ol' big toe. Now I'm think'n it is broke....or a severe jam.
It swoled up pretty good.
Been very painful all day since this morn'n. Cain't move it without a bunch of pain. Well, I can move it with my fingers, scream "MOMS"....if'n that means anything. Cain't do no walk'n on it at all. Warm water soak and ice packs didn't help. How do ya fix a broke toe if it's really broke?
Anyhows, I'm gonna stay off'n it for a couple days....see what happens.
Well, I might as well stay up since I hobbled my way to the kitchen. Brewed me up a pot, sit down on the couch sip'n up a cup....an' hugged my big toe. By now, 8am, if'n it was broked, it would be as big as a sore thumb. But it ain't. I won't be do'n no hikes in the woods today.
One other reason I won't be do'n no hikes today....it's rain'n. I'm tell'n ya right now, weather has got a thing against us older people. I remember back when I was just a little tyke, if'n it rained, we was out in it play'n all sorts of fun games. Splash'n through mud puddles....barefooted, stuff like that. Get all sop'n wet. "Moms" holler'n, "Billy, get out of that mud puddle fore I wear you out". Rain was good back then.
Bout 3 or 4....maybe 5 year ago, rain follow me around everwhere I go. I were under a black cloud that year. I went to the "slabs" to spend the winter. It rained. My front yard was a lake.....what was named "Lake Billy Bob". NOTE! Somewhere's is a whole year of lost photos....gone, pooof, just like that.
But anyhows, that year rain was my worst enemy. I would travel mile after mile in beautiful weather, set up camp somewheres, an' the next day it would rain all holy hell. Some were just a little gusher shower.....bout half a inch, something like that. Just enough to make mud pies an' float a boat. Others were torrential....ya don't even wanna think bout go'n outside. It happened every where I went that year....2007 or 08 I think it was. Rain sucks.
I were sit'n there on the couch watch'n golf. Sadie Mae says...."HEY WAKE UP, what's for supper"? How bout a big ol' pot of Billy Bob Beef Stew Soup?
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4pm update:
Ok, I think I may have made a poor diagnosis of my poor ol' big toe. Now I'm think'n it is broke....or a severe jam.
Been very painful all day since this morn'n. Cain't move it without a bunch of pain. Well, I can move it with my fingers, scream "MOMS"....if'n that means anything. Cain't do no walk'n on it at all. Warm water soak and ice packs didn't help. How do ya fix a broke toe if it's really broke?
Anyhows, I'm gonna stay off'n it for a couple days....see what happens.
I guess you could use dog kibbles in the soup in a pinch! Glad your toe isn't broken. Those middle of the night leg cramps are plumb terrible. I get them every night, and they sure prevent a good night's sleep.
ReplyDeleteI only get these nasty leg cramps if'n I overexert myself....or if'n my feet get cold.
DeleteI just hope to hell nobody suggests I take some kind of pill.
Wal*Mart sells leg cramp pills. Mine don't cramp too much but they get this funny feeling and then they jerk real hard and wake me up or won't let me go to sleep. The leg cramp pills seem to help. Don't know why. Hey, that soup looks deeelishiouss.
ReplyDeleteOOPS!!! Too late....you suggested a freak'n pill. I been tell'n ya for over a year that my leg cramp come from a injured back. Pills don't help.
DeleteThe soup looks better than it tastes. Dad gum chicken broth instead of beef broth.
Mine comes from a back injury I got while working a contract job in North Carolina. It only acts up and effects my legs if I am on my feet standing too much or over doing it. My back can take walking but not standing.
DeleteMaybe it's dislocated ? Hie yourself to an urgent care center or a dr.
ReplyDeleteIf'n it was dislocated, wouldn't it be stick'n out to the side?
DeleteGonna see what happens in the next few days.
Great job with Photoshop on that toe. You are the master!
ReplyDeleteSure do wisht that was the case. Is Photoshop free???
DeleteGet Sadie Mae to look at it.
ReplyDeleteShe look at it alright.....then go back to sleep. No help there.
DeleteHave her bend it! Have her move it around. That will be exciting.
ReplyDeleteI would "beat" my dawg if'n she was to do that. She's more interested in me pet'n her than her feel'n any compassion for my poor ol' big toe.
DeleteDang it all, Billy Bob; if it ain't one thing, it's another. I'm tellin you, getting old ain't as much fun as I was expecting. Keep soaking that toe; got some Epsom salts? No? Table salt then. I've had more broken digits than I can count.
ReplyDeleteI ben soak'n it in hot water with no salt. Don't want to waste all my table salt an' I ain't go'n to no store.
DeleteI broke three toes, went to the Dr. and said all they could possibly do is wrap gauze around them to protect them. Oh, and charged me $125.
ReplyDeleteI can not offer any advice on your toes but...get to a clinic! As far as I know there ain't no cure for a broken toe.
ReplyDeleteI think your dark cloud was more around 2009 when I started reading you. I think I even suggested you start charging people to come to their town jajajajaja :D
Doc told me, only thing to do is tape it up, but from the looks of yours, wouldn't help. I taped my 2 to the next one over. I think that ended my playing football with the guys. Had to wear a hard toed shoe for about 3 weeks.
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ReplyDelete