Yesterday I was sit'n here do'n nuttin, wast'n a few hours filling my mind with internet stuff. "My God Mark, put that steering damper back on "da house". Two weeks delivery for a freak'n $130 shock absorber. "Sally" be OK with the old one. Finding parts for a Workhorse chassis (formally Chevrolet) is like finding a muffler for a old Ford Pinto. "Just put it back on Mark, this is BS".
Anyhows.....I grab holt to a clean'n rag. I'm gonna clean house. You know don't ya, that the nice clean'n lady is no longer employed to clean "Sally da house". If I'm gonna pay hard earned dollars to a clean'n lady, things should be sparkling clean? Right? Well, they weren't.
Well anyways, I drop that clean'n rag like a hot tater. I ain't clean'n nuttin while I got a sink full of dirty dishes. So I done dishes....most of 'em anyhows. Now why does it take two hours to wash up a sink of dishes? I'll tell ya why....I hate wash'n dishes, that why.
There are times I open up a book an' there ain't nuttin there. The title an' first paragraph draws my attention, but I lose interest as I read on. What the hell is the author try'n to say? Has he lost his ever love'n mind? This guy used to have excit'n books with all kinds of interest'n information an' funny stories. Couldn't wait for his next publication. I rekon he's just get'n old or something like that.
We was sit'n out there on "da porch" last night. We got talk'n bout old dogs....along with a little BS. JoJo came to mind. We lived on the boat ya know, just me an' JoJo. No first mates or nuttin like that. He weren't like no other dog I ever seen in my life....part human, part cat, part acrobat an' 110% dawg.....steal my shrimps when I weren't look'n. An he could whisper. Weigh in right at 18 pounds soak'n wet.....what he didn't like one bit. He was skeered of water an' hated the wash down hose.
I was hose'n down the deck one hot summer day. JoJo was sit'n in the cockpit watch'n my every move. "He's gonna squirt me, I just know he's gonna squirt me". I did. JoJo give me one them looks. You know what I'm talk'n bout....."bastard!!!". He heads for the front of the boat out of spray'n distance. I point that hose at JoJo an' squeeze the trigger. JoJo heads to the forward deck. I squirt again. JoJo goes out on the "bow sprit"....where he casually topples into the water 15 feet below.
He swims around to the pick up station where I dip him out with a big ass dip net. He's pissed. Goes inside the boat, soak'n wet an' calmly climbs into the captains bunk. Did I ever tell ya bout the time....??? JoJo piss on my computer keyboard.
Me an' Jim, another neighbor, will be headed up to Silver City this afternoon. Jim asks me if'n I like Mexican food. Well yeah I do....you betcha. "Maybe if'n you was to take the camera Billy Bob".
In the mean time, I'm gonna take my coffee jug out on "da porch" an' wait. To hell with clean'n when you gonna eat Mexican food.
Anyhows.....I grab holt to a clean'n rag. I'm gonna clean house. You know don't ya, that the nice clean'n lady is no longer employed to clean "Sally da house". If I'm gonna pay hard earned dollars to a clean'n lady, things should be sparkling clean? Right? Well, they weren't.
Well anyways, I drop that clean'n rag like a hot tater. I ain't clean'n nuttin while I got a sink full of dirty dishes. So I done dishes....most of 'em anyhows. Now why does it take two hours to wash up a sink of dishes? I'll tell ya why....I hate wash'n dishes, that why.
There are times I open up a book an' there ain't nuttin there. The title an' first paragraph draws my attention, but I lose interest as I read on. What the hell is the author try'n to say? Has he lost his ever love'n mind? This guy used to have excit'n books with all kinds of interest'n information an' funny stories. Couldn't wait for his next publication. I rekon he's just get'n old or something like that.
We was sit'n out there on "da porch" last night. We got talk'n bout old dogs....along with a little BS. JoJo came to mind. We lived on the boat ya know, just me an' JoJo. No first mates or nuttin like that. He weren't like no other dog I ever seen in my life....part human, part cat, part acrobat an' 110% dawg.....steal my shrimps when I weren't look'n. An he could whisper. Weigh in right at 18 pounds soak'n wet.....what he didn't like one bit. He was skeered of water an' hated the wash down hose.
I was hose'n down the deck one hot summer day. JoJo was sit'n in the cockpit watch'n my every move. "He's gonna squirt me, I just know he's gonna squirt me". I did. JoJo give me one them looks. You know what I'm talk'n bout....."bastard!!!". He heads for the front of the boat out of spray'n distance. I point that hose at JoJo an' squeeze the trigger. JoJo heads to the forward deck. I squirt again. JoJo goes out on the "bow sprit"....where he casually topples into the water 15 feet below.
He swims around to the pick up station where I dip him out with a big ass dip net. He's pissed. Goes inside the boat, soak'n wet an' calmly climbs into the captains bunk. Did I ever tell ya bout the time....??? JoJo piss on my computer keyboard.
Me an' Jim, another neighbor, will be headed up to Silver City this afternoon. Jim asks me if'n I like Mexican food. Well yeah I do....you betcha. "Maybe if'n you was to take the camera Billy Bob".
In the mean time, I'm gonna take my coffee jug out on "da porch" an' wait. To hell with clean'n when you gonna eat Mexican food.
If you like dogs, you have to watch this, reminds me of something you would do. Copy the link to URL to open.
ReplyDeletehttps://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10153202463540230&set=vb.521740229&type=2&theater
Hey, don't you know any excuse to get out of cleaning the house will work. Just stick to it. Enjoy the Mexican food.
ReplyDeleteYou are so mean, Billy Bob! Yet JoJo got his revenge, didn't he? That tale cracked me up.
ReplyDeleteSittin' here wishin' I had a huge Mexican dinner too; a bottle of the hottest sauce to go with it sounds good too.
Don't just love good boat Dog's I had Golden Cocker spaniel that was loved by everyone and anyone that tired up on our dock. But God don't put her on the swim platform hate to even get a bath...Loved that dog never be another one like her...You should do a week on just Boating and sailing lies should be real good.
ReplyDelete