UPDATE>>>>This post for backyard mechanics, automotive engineers an' ecletronics technitions

Boy howdy I been scratch my head for a few weeks now with this damn "billy jeep" not run right. Yesterday I had me a plus in my "Billy Bob can fix anything" attempts to find the cause of the problems. Expect some details...that's the way I do things.

If'n ya remember, a couple months ago the battery was slap dead. I have what is called a 40 amp "smart" battery charger what is operated by electronics. The battery was fully charged with this charger. The engine was cranked up. It don't run right. Hard to start an' rpm only go to bout 2500 with a Rrrrrrr, Rrrrrr, Rrrrrr at that rpm. The engine was shut down an' the battery charger was stowed. Ya see, it was way way too cold for the old Billy Bob to be sit'n outside in a cold car try'n to figger out why this sucker don't run right.

A month passes. It's warmer. I goes outside to start the "billy jeep". Errrrrr, Errrrrr. Errrrrrr....the freak'n battery is low again. Battery charger is hook up again an' I charge up that battery overnight. The next day I goes crank 'er up. The battery charger is still hook up. What the hell, it don't run right. Rrrrrr, Rrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr....2500 rpm.

Ok, let me 'splain something bout cars. They are operated by computer....an' a gazillion little electronic devices what talk to the computer to make it go a hunnert mile a hour in 6.3 seconds. The designer of these computers was thoughtful. He added a mode called "limp home mode". The car will run, but ya ain't never gonna go a hunnert mile a hour. This is the mode that the "billy jeep" goes into. There's more details I could go into, but what the hell, I ain't gonna.

Ok, yesterday. I have a back doctor appointment. While wait'n for "yo mama", my driver, I cranks up the Jeep. Just as expected....Rrrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr....2500 rpms. I says a few words an' off to the doctor appointment. Think'n all the way.

On return, I says "let's reset the computer". On most cars, all ya gotta do is disconnect the battery an' wait bout 3 minutes an' walla, the computer is reset. But not on my Jeep. Ya gotta disconnect the positive battery terminal an' touch it to the negative terminal for a minute. This discharges the capacitors in the computer....an' walla, the computer is reset. I do that. I crank the "billy jeep" up an' it sound like hell. Barley get it crank up an' it's in "limp home mode". Before I go on too much further, in the last couple months, it's cranked up a few times just like it suppose to do.....think hunnert mile a hour. Then all a sudden it run like shit.
Ok, back to yesterday. I'm stand'n outside. The "smart" battery charger is hook up. The engine is run'n an' sound like shit. The charger is put'n 37 amps into my charged battery. Think'n this is way way too much charge for a charged battery, I disconnect the positive cable. The freak'n engine die....shut slap down.
I goes an' crank it back up. MY GOD, it sound like a hunnert dollar bill. Rpm go to 8000 rpm lickity split. Scratch head an' crank it up bout 10 more times....sound like a hunnert dollar bill each time.
I gotta go pee, brew up a pot an' do me a little think'n. 

Before I go any further.....this was yesterday, not today. Will it crank up an' go a hunnert mile a hour today? I'll let ya know after I find my other shoe. Until then....laters.

Well shit, I wrote all that stuff for nuttin. Fount my shoe an' go outside an' crank that thing up. Yeeee Haaa, it sound perfect. That is for bout 5 start ups. Then the freak'n engine just die....shut down. Crank it back up 3 times in "limp home mode". What the hell??? Then it start up an' sound like a hunnet dollar again. For another 8 start ups. Ha ha, I had to pee so I'm back inside. Scratch'n my head. Gonna do me some Google research an' see what I find. Back laters.

Damn Jeep.....Grrrrrrr

It's been said by me an' it's been said by others, that daily blog writ'n is com'n to a end. There are many reasons you don't see daily blog posts any more, but the most probable reason be'n..."I ain't got nuttin to write about". That's the excuse I been us'n for quite some time now. I would love to change that, but....damn, I gotta do something to write bout it.

In my younger days, like just a couple years ago, I would see somebody sit'n in a easy chair watch'n TV at 10am an' I would say...."I ain't never gonna do that". Then things got worster. My fish'n poles ain't even been looked at in the last 2 years. My golf'n clubs are cry'n "let's go swak a ball". The poor old "bubba boat" is stowed out of sight an' it's registration is expired. The remote control boats are sit'n on shelfs collect'n dust. I ain't done nuttin.

Boy howdy you aughter hear me go into a cuss'n spasm when this freak'n Dell computer locks up in the middle of "surf'n". I did me some research on it. It ain't Dell's fault, it's that damn Windows 10 what caused it. Now the Toshiba laptop has been upgraded to Win 10 an' it's just fine. But in my research I find I ain't the only one that has lock up problems. There are thousands that has 'em. An' there ain't no cure. Win 10 changes something in the computer an' the computer says...."what the hell???"....then it just shuts down...all lock up.

Me an' "yo mama" jump in her truck an' head off to the back doctor. Take bout 45 minutes to get there. An' My God, "yo mama's" driv'n scare the hell out me. We get to the doctors office an' there ain't no cars in the park'n lot. I goes inside. The nice little girl tells me...."I been call'n you 4 times". "We have no doctors here today". She had the wrong number on the computer. Next appointment is Friday at 3pm.....a different doctor. All I'm want'n is a appointment for a nerve kill'n. Will see how that works out.

I don't like my new coffee pot. You cain't get a cup of coffee while it's brew'n....an' I want my coffee right now. It takes more grinds that the old Mr Coffee for the same amount of cups. Then it still don't taste right. I'll never ever buy me another expensive coffee maker.

This damn cat Leonard is done change his attitude. He's outside all day long an' the only thing he say to me when he comes inside is "I want some freak'n food". He don't jump up in my lap no more an' if'n he do, he's only there for a couple minutes. His curfew is 7pm, what he trys his darndest to make it to 9pm. Then he says...."I want some freak'n food". An' goes to sleep.

Got me some real problems with the "billy jeep". The battery is fully charged. I start it up an' it go crazy.....Rrrrrrrrr, Rrrrrrrr, Rrrrrrr......2500 rpm all it do. Then I shut it down. Restart....it don't start. I checks connections under the hood....wiggle everthing. Don't fix a thing. With the Rrrrrr, Rrrrrr, Rrrrrr I'm think'n along the lines of "it ain't git'n enough fuel"....fuel pump. Does Jeeps have a fuel filter???
Yup it does....an' it take a special tool to remove an' replace. Grrrrrrr. An' the filter cost almost half a hunnet dollar. Grrrrrrr.

Ok, while the engine was run'n, I turn on the heat. "What the hell????"....fog come out the vents. Smell just like antifreeze. The heater core has got a hole in it. Google google google, I can git it fix for $800. The dashboard has to be removed. For me, that would be a 2 day affair, an' then it has to be all put back together. I ain't do'n that. I'll bypass the heater an' freeze my ass off before I pull a dashboard. Do ya think a 2001 Jeep Grand Cherokee Limited will fit in a dumpster? I know I should have bought one them little Jeeps what never break down. Grrrrrrrr.

I was sit'n here think'n last night...."how the hell am I gonna get back to Texas"? The way things are go'n, I'm almost too skeered to crank up an' head that way. Remember a year ago the most stressful trip I ever make go'n back to Texas? That was all due to a faulty ignition switch what was burn up. With my health issues, things just don't add up. I need a freak'n driver....nurse an' cook.

Ok, I know I ain't said nuttin excit'n or nuttin like that, but at least I said something. Would be great if'n I could get back to writ'n bout adventures instead of whinn'n bout this kind of stuff. Kind of reminds me of the year that everwhere I traveled, it rained 5 gallon buckets full when I got there.

Ok, see's ya laters......  

"Oh my God, Billy Bob ain't dead"

Ha, today I have absolutely nuttin I want to do....although there is a hunnert things what need done. But...I ain't gonna do 'em. Do ya know how long it would take me to do a hunnert things???

Yesterday I went to the doctor. The stomach doctor. It was as I had expected, she prescribed me a new medicine for the erosion's in my stomach an' tells me "don't take no more them laxative pills". That was it. Oh wait, my hoarse voice, she say that happens sometimes from a endoscopy. She ain't gonna do nuttin bout it an' she caused it. "Gargle" she tell me...with salt water. Damn, that would mean a trip to south Texas an' the Gulf of Mexico. An' no guarantee salt water will fix it.

Then me an' "yo mama" heads off to a K-Mart what is closing. Everthing is discounted either 10 or 20%. Sounds good don't it? Well that was a lie. The workers was tak'n the K-Mart price tags off'n everthing...what is 30 to 40% lower than suggested price. Then ya get yourself a 10 to 20% discount off'n suggested price. An' people was com'n out of there with buggies full of discounted stuff. I'm think'n common core math is involved. I bought nuttin.

While trasp'n through the store look'n at the wounderful discounted prices, my freak'n hip went out. I almost go to the floor....thank ya K-Mart buggy....my walker. Then when I get to the truck, I cain't raise my right leg to get in. A nice guy help me. Ha ha, then I wait for a hour for "yo mama" to finish her shop'n.

We pick up some Whoppers an' fries an' head back home. Whopper an' fries make me sick....'my God, that never happen before. Oh wait, yes it did. Back in Deming. in 2008, me Sadie Mae an' Lug Nut head off to the mountains to do a little gold prospect'n. Ha, that was a waisted trip, I find nuttin. Back in Deming I stop at What-a-Burger and get me a double meat Whopper an' large fries. Boy howdy was I ever full. Then the pains started...."I eat too much". But that weren't the case. I was hav'n me a heart attack an' didn't know it. "Pesky neighbor" Wayne take me to the hospital at 9:30pm. Nurse tell me that 500mg aspirin probly save my life. The rest the story you already know...triple bypass. It's been all downhill ever since.

Has it been cold. Well yeah it's been cold....but I'm surviv'n it just fine. It's nice an' warm in "da house". Low temps have been in the lower 20's to lower 30's. Day time temps anywheres from upper 30's a couple days to upper 50's other days. Ain't nuttin wrong with that...as long as I'm not outside.

For 2 critters what don't get along, they look pretty comfortable in this pic.

In other news...."billy jeep" may have to go to the Jeep doctor for test'n. I went out an' crank it up an' everthing sound perfect. That is for bout 5 minutes. Then the damn thing go ape shit....won't go past 2500 rpm.....rrrrrrrm, rmmmm, rmmmm...that all it do. Turn key off an' restart...everything sound perfect. Something ain't right.

Ok, that's it for this post. Ain't a thing go'n on to write about....see ya laters.
 

D problems ever end????....not at my house

Ha ha, more problems. It was right at 6 weeks ago when I buyed a brand spank'n new propane tank an' fill it up with 28 gallons of propane. It's [this] close to empty. Ok, where the hell did all my propane go to? I've used the Mr Heater when it got really cold, but not enough to burn up 28 gallons of propane. The water heater has been "on" all this time....while I was work'n on it. If there was a propane leak, somebody would have smelled it. I've kind of sorta calculated useage an' I don't come nowheres close to 28 gallons. The Mr Heater close to 10 or 12 gallons an' the water heater maybe 2 gallons. Will be check'n for leaks again after the installation of new piping for the Mr Heater move.

Then to top that off, my freak'n coffee pot gave up the ghost this morn'n. It brew up bout a quarter pot an' "die". Time for another Amazon order. But first I'll pull a Billy Bob....take that sucker apart an' see what the problem is. Maybe a fix.

The nice warm weather also give up the ghost. Last night the wind was a blow'n up a storm an' the temp went down a few degs. For the next week or so we gonna have some more very very low temps....lower 20's night time an' mid 50's day time. That sucks. And YES, that's very very low temps. But, I'm gonna make it.

Leonard is taller than Sadie Mae. They was stand'n next to each other an' I says..."what the hell, Leonard is taller than Sadie Mae". He don't weigh as much as Sadie Mae, but he is a big cat. Think'n close to 12 pounds now....even with his diet I put him on. One cup a day is all he gets. Unless he is catch'n birds an' eat'n 'em. He is a hunter ya know, as most cats are. He is also no longer a indoor cat. He loves it outside, even when it's cold an' wet out there. Silly cat. His curfew is 7pm....what he don't like one bit.

I'm still feel'n pretty good, but not good enough to be driv'n no motorhome a thousand mile to south Texas. The ol' stomach is act'n up again, but still not as bad as before. Rekon I'm gonna have to get back on my stomach meds an' deal with the side effects. Damn I hate that idea. Back an' hip bout the same....hurt like hell all the time. Come on back doctor appointment. Hmmmm, I wonder if'n ALL doctors are quacks?

Speak'n of doctors. Remember when I posted bout get'n a endoscopy? At the time, Gypsy commented bout one she had years ago what made her voice harsh. Well, the same thing happen to the old Billy Bob. It's very hard for me to talk to anybody. An' when I do, my voice is very raspy. That sucks when ya got something important to say. Will discuss with the endoscopy doc next appointment date. I wonder if'n ya can sue a doctor for chang'n your voice?

Ok, I take the bottom off'n the coffee pot. All the little devices check out Ok, got 115 volts to the heating element....but it don't get hot. Do a continuity check on the heating element. Yup, it ain't got no continuity,,,,open circuit. Now what kind (brand) coffee pot should I order from Amazon? The newer Mr Coffee is a 12 cupper, humungest (great big), an' I don't want no great big 12 cupper coffee pot.....I want 8 cups with a stainless steel pot thingy.  

Boy howdy, this Chris Craft boat sure is collect'n a lot of dust just sit'n on a shelf. At this point, I have no desire to work on the damn thing. I am [this] close to complet'n the project....what the hell?

Speak'n of computers....have ya ever cuss a computer? The new Dell computer is really got the old Billy Bob all piss off. Cuss that sucker. I be online do'n something, an' the damn thing lock slap up. Got to do a cold start an' start all over. So I now have one computer what lock up all the time an' another that the X don't work, the CD don't work an' the camera card reader don't work. Think'n I'll take this one (Dell) back to Best Buy an' get it fixed....under warranty. The Toshiba, the fixes would probly cost more than a new laptop. The non work'n X be'n my main concern. Hmmmm, wonder if'n I can disable the keyboard an' reinstall it to fix the X? May try that just for the hell of it.

Ok, that's bout all I have to talk bout today. See ya laters.

Is winter over?

Oh hell, why not, let's do this. Ha ha, easy to say, but do'n ain't as easy as say'n. What to write about?

Well let's start with how I been feel'n. Pretty dad gum good if'n I do say so myself. I been eat'n. I been sleep'n. I been watch'n crap on the TV. I been keep'n nice an' cozy. Yesterday....dishes is all warshed up. Floors are sweeped. Trash is out. Ran Sally da house engine. Ran the Onan generator. Emptied the black water tank....pump that shit bout 80 feet. Man, what a good day. Shoot, I feel pretty dad gun good. But....I cain't wait to see my nerve kill'n doctor. I don't rekon my back will ever be pain free.

The old Billy Bob took up knit'n, crochet'n, basket weav'n, an' the upholstery trade. Mostly upholstery. Do ya recall when I was tell'n ya bout the old recliner cover what catched on fire? It was big, the cover thingy, an' hanged down too far on the back. The Mr Heater says...."hey, lookie here, combustibles"....an' set it ablaze. The Mr Heater move is complete....even ordered an' installed a 6 volt thingy to run the fan. Anyhow, I says to myself, if'n I only had me a sew maching, I could make that cover fit. "Yo mama" just so happen to have a extra sew machine. I set to work. My God, this will never work.....this needs some dumpster time. I hear a knock on my door. Nobody knocks on my door....what the hell. It was "yo mama" with a basket of material....one be'n upholstery material an' it looked good. I'm think'n I can do this. Measurements, drawings, cut here, cut there...fire up the sew machine. The back half was done the other day an' the finish'n half was done yesterday. My God, it looks like store bought....almost. To prove my point, here is a pic of a brand spank'n new recliner cover thingy I put together.

 See what I'm talk'n bout...I'm a upholstery guy.

After the snow, we only had a couple three more days of cold ass temps. It got so warm follow'n that that I open up the front winder shade thingys so's I can see outside. Ha ha, but shit, come Tuesday night, I gonna have to close them again to keep the cold outside an' the heat inside. But look'n outside for 4 or 5 days is worth a million dollar. An' sunshine, Yaaa Hooo!!!

When I say I'm eat'n, I had to throw half a pot of chicken noodle veg soup in the dumpster. Ya see, ever time I make a pot of something to last a few days, I get a ton of free food from up at the house an' from Robert. The soup got sour in the frige that long...bout 5 or 6 days. Ha, last night I eat me up bout 5 pounds of tacos what Mandi made for me. I was stuffed. An' then....here come Robert with a big bowl od apple pie an' ice cream. "Put it in the freezer Robert". Bout 30 minure later I couldn't take it no longer....I eat that stuff slap up. Now I was really stuffed......Yeeee Haaa!!!
 
I sooo want my couch back. That would mean I got to put the desktop back over there where the recliner sits. An' that means the recliner would have to go. Or, I could put the recliner over there where the tug boat sits on a cabinet....what would mean that a shelf would have to be constructed over the desktop for the tug boat an' the Mississippi riverboat....an' toss the cabinet in the dumpster....what would mean I got to find new storage space for the stuff in the cabinet. Dang, that sounds like I got myself in a situation.

"billy jeep" registration has arrived from Texas. Good for another year....with no safety inspection. Ya see, when I ordered the registration online, the inspection was still in effect. It ain't now. They probably gonna put a bench warrant on me an' lock me up the first day I get back to the Texas border. Although I do have 24 hours to get inspected. Ha, I cain't drive from Shreveport La. (the border) to south Texas in 24 hours. This new shit sucks.

My stocks did wonderful last week. I need to spend some money. "How bout a new couch Billy Bob"?

Ok, that's bout it for now. Things are look'n up. For how long, I don't know.
 

HEY....it's Billy Bob

Just 'cause I'm "stuck in Georgia" don't mean I have kick the bucket an' don't read blogs an' think bout ya an' wished I was back in Texas an' was catch'n me some big 14 pound bass fish. It's very very hard to make a blog post while you're watch'n some crap on the TV an' sleep'n your life away. My God, I cain't believe how much time I spend in a deep slumber....long daily naps.

Holy crap....it's white outside.I was sit'n here watch'n some crap on the TV last night an' Sadie Mae says...."I gotta go pee". I open the door an' lo an' behold, it was snow'n. Weather guy was right for a change. Temp had dropped down to bout 20 degs as the latest storm passed through. It's right at noon as I type this, an' the temp is still bout 27 degrees...an' the snow is still on the ground.

 Them are Sadie Mae tracks. Poor ol' Leonard took one look outside an' says...."I ain't hav'n none that stuff". But he did go outside this morn'n for no more than 3 minutes.

There has been absolutely nuttin excit'n to write about. But you already knew that. Medical issues can sure mess up a persons life, if'n ya know what I mean. I'm only gonna take a minute of your time as we talk bout what ails me. I been feel'n pretty damn good for the last week or so. Other than this damn back an' hip. I ain't took none my stomach meds in almost 2 weeks. I feel no stomach issues, although I know they are still there. Just not as bad as before. The meds work....but...the side effects suck as bad as a flat tire on a John Deere lawn tractor.

The ol' lower back an' hip is still bout the same. A good dose of aspirin eases it up for a pretty good period of time. The aspirin also eats away at my stomach. So what do you do?

We, me an' Robert, are changing the location of my Mr Heater. Ya see, it sit so close to my recliner that it set the recliner cover thingy slap on fire while I was sleep'n. It weren't no big fire or nuttin like that, but it could have been. The new location will be much much more safer...away from any combustibles that could set "Sally da house" on fire. That's all I need at this time in my life.

It's been very cozy in "da house" with the low temps outside. I keep it right bout 74 degs at sit down level, but damn, my feet sure do get kind of on the cold side. Socks help a little bit.

I still hav'n me water heater problems. I done check an' adjust stuff an' the damn thing still red light on me. The spark igniter don't make as good a spark I think it should, so I'm gonna clean the black stuff off'n the electrodes. But...I reset the water heater 2 days ago an' the damn thing ain't red lighted one time. Go figger. I didn't fix nuttin but the damn thing is work'n....so far. Been 2 maybe 3 days.

I keep ask myself "what ya gonna do now" an' I don't come up with a good answer. Here's the deal. I would love to be in Texas.....but....in Texas I have no one to look after me if needed. I would be alone if'n ya catch my drift. Here in Georgia I have family close an' my needs are took care of right now. Shit like that will put you in a state of depression....although men don't do depression (macho thing).
I fount a piece of property. 2.8 acres with a 112 year old house sit'n on it. In need of remodeling. Not by me, but by Robert. Hmmmm....think of my RV shelter dream. I could always sell "Sally da house" an' move into the house with Robert an' Mandi. Just a thought.

Ok, I'm gonna leave it at that for a while. Will try to post more often.  


  

Bout the same in Georgia.....cold

I still ain't got nuttin e(cks)cit'n (exciting) to write bout.....But, I'm think'n I can still fix stuff. Maybe. (hey, did you see that? Spell checker just fixed fic).
Anyhows, I been hav'n a time with my water heater. It's been "red light'n" on me an' I ain't got no hot water. I conned Robert into install'n the new thermostat I buyed a couple months ago an' thought my problems was over. Ha...RED LIGHT the next morn'n. Yesterday I adjust the air thingy to get a better flame. RED LIGHT this morn'n. Ok, let's go do something else. How bout check'n the orifice. What I did. Hmmmm, what the hell is that stuff in the orifice? Clean it out an' reinstall. Fire that sucker up an' readjust the air thingy. Hmmmm, sound just like a RV water heater.....ROOOOOAAARR. Or something like that. Will know tomorrow morn'n if it's fixed.

It's been cold at "Yo Mama's RV Resort". Nighttime temps in the low 20's a couple nights with upper 40's day time. Mostly 29 to 31 last couple nights. I dribble the water faucet a little at night so's water lines don't freeze up an' I have to use dog water for my morn'n coffee. Been have to fire up the Mr Heater a couple three times. 10,000 btu's just ain't quite enough from the 2 electric heaters. Adding another 4,500 from the Mr H sure do help bring the inside temp up to 75 or 78 degs. That's set on low. Medium is 9000 an' hi is 18000. Maybe I shoulda never remove the ducted furnace. Had our first sunshine in 2 weeks yesterday an' today. Got to love sunshine.

Health issues still bout the same. Hip hurt like hell most all day long an' stomach issues ain't a whole bunch better. Got off'n aspirin until I feel better. I had to get off the stomach med again. Make me sick for bout a hour or so an' then it plug me slap up. Wait'n for word from the doctor.

Work on a boat??? Well hell no. I still got to get the desktop clean off an' put up some the no longer needed stuff. But I DID warsh up some dishes again. That's bout the jist of my do'n stuff.