Monday, July 30, 2012

Old "Pesky"

Boy howdy, I were sit'n here sip'n up a cup an' "pesky neighbor" Wayne give me a call. Had us a great BS cession talk'n bout weeds in my yard, Sadie Mae and the ducks, golf ball swak'n....all kind of stuff.

Wayne is do'n pretty dern good for all he been through in the last 2 years. For the new followers what don't know bout "pesky neighbor" Wayne, he was my neighbor, live right next door, when I was home based in Deming, NM. We were good friends. Sit on "da porch" every day sip'n a cup an' tell'n stories. Travel all over the place swak'n golf balls. He got his name "pesky neighbor" from his antics of visiting the old Billy Bob no less than 5 times a day. Take the dogs for golf cart rides.

Anyhows, Wayne is all excitis bout me headed that way for a visit. Gonna park in my old space so's he don't have far to walk to pester me like he did for bout 6 years. He's walk'n all over the RV park....without the assistance of his 4x4 walker. Still has the golf cart, but said I gonna have to do some maintenance on it when I get there. We gonna hit the golf course first thing....swak some golf balls. He says he can hit one bout 25 yards. Says he "I cain't hold on to the club". I says "duct tape". That gonna be a long game I betcha. But as long as he is with me is all what matters.

I didn't tell ya bout that old hound dog did I? Ya see, it were like this....the neighbors hound dog ambled up to the twins birthday party. Just stop by to see what go'n on with all them people outside in the yard. Then he spy that cat, what was mind'n it's own business in the shade of a tree. All hell break loose....hound dog gonna git that cat. If'n ya ain't never hear a hound dog, it a sound you ain't never gonna forget. They don't bark ya know, just make this God awful WOOOOOOOOOOOO sound....over and over. Since it were my daughters cat and nobody gived a hoot if'n that old hound dog kill it or not, the old Billy Bob grab holt that hound dog. That when more hell break loose. That damn old hound dog drag me all over the back yard. I says, "I need some relief here". But ain't nobody help the old Billy Bob. That dog knock me slap to the ground before I let him loose. He hurt me.....bastard dog. But by this time, that cat had fount him a safe haven. I get'n too old to be latch'n on to a big ol' hound dog. In my younger day, I would of throwed that dog in the woods.

I spent yesterday on the couch lay'n back tak'n it easy.....look'n on the internet at 'lectric motors for the "Billy Bike".  I get'n pretty good at that here lately....lay'n back tak'n it easy.....internet research. Rekon I be need'n me another project. What ya think?

I sure been enjoy'n my stay here in Ga. Even if I ain't went camp'n and catched me no fish. Been a while since I been comfortable stay'n in one place this long. Gonna kind of hate when I leave. But I have great expectations for my trip to Deming and all over Texas this fall an' winter. Be meet'n up with the OFM Barney somewheres down the road a piece. We both had decided to spend some time at Falcon lake again this year, so we gonna be hav'n us some fun, riding bikes and catch'n up big ol' bass fishes. Or as Barney would say...."having toooo much fun".

Ok....got things to do....see ya.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Hot damn, birthday parties are fun

Yesterdays birthday party was a success. Well it was for the birthday kids an' young folk anyhows. Holy crap, I ain't see so many people in one place in a hunnert year.

This is the birthday girl Rainee....such a cutie.

This handsome little feller is Cooper, the birthday boy, yup, he one handsome dude.
The mother of these gorgeous granyoung'uns, my oldest daughter Doris Lynn....her purty too....huh?

She got them good looks from this old feller........

What more could ya ask for at a birthday party? It were a ton 'o fun day an' I even met some "lookers", church go'n folks and one little girl (bout 18 or so) what look like a redneck hooker (not related)....or something like that. But that ain't the one I got my eye on. I gots to have one what know how to cook, wash winders, sweep an' mop, take the trash out an' fix me a sammich...you know what I'm talk'n bout. Hee hee....here come the Billy Bob. You really don't think I'm serious, do ya???

Yesterday morn'n I took me a bike ride down the street a piece. "You go'n too far Billy Bob, ya gotta peddle this sucker back home ya know". Had to stop a couple time on the way back 'cause my legs was wore slap out.....ain't go'n no further. By the time I got back to "da house", I were in pain, tak'n big ol' deep breaths, heart go'n a hunnert mile a hour......damn, bike ride'n sucks. Gonna have to do me some think'n bout this situation. The way I see it, if'n I take a little ride every day, after bout a hunnert mile or so, my legs gonna be just fine.
"psssst Billy Bob....electric motor".

Speak'n of that bike carrier and those think'n the old Billy Bob didn't take into consideration how low "Billy Bike" is gonna hang, fear not, it plenty high enough. Well, maybe I might raise it up just a smidgen (couple inches) to appease concerning minds. 

Saturday, July 28, 2012

Run'n out of stuff to do

I been sit'n here all morn'n think'n bout what I'm gonna do next. With all the modifications done to "that bike" ("Billy Bike") and it hang'n on that modified car carrier, I ain't got nuttin to do. I swear....my life is get'n to be a total bore.

I did find something to do yesterday, although I ain't finished it yet. I got stuff lay'n all over the floor. I started pick'n up tools an' stuff, put'n them away, sort'n out nuts an' bolts, screws, electric stuff....etc, etc. Boy howdy, I gifted my son Robert with bout a hunnert dollar worth of stuff I'll never use in a lifetime. Who ever hear of a retired old man with 2 25 foots tape measures? Oh by the way, I bought me up a brand spank'n new 16 foots tape measure the other day. Now I own two. Why do men have to have 2 of everything? I got 2 hacksaws......why???? I got 4 hammers....why??? I got a hunnert screwdrivers. 2 or 3 sets of sockets. I got a impact wrench what ain't been use in years. "Damn Billy Bob, get rid some that stuff". I got stuff I ain't never gonna use.....sheesh!!!!

I got a generator what I need to get rid of. But I don't want to give it to somebody who don't need it. Been tote'n it around for 3 year. It needs to go.

I ain't all excited bout go'n to no birthday party this afternoon. Ya see, my used to be favorite bro in law is gonna be there and the old Billy Bob is piss off at him. Ain't gonna go into no details, but there maybe could be a fist to cuff in my future.Well maybe it won't come to that, but he gonna hear what Billy Bob got to say. Or I could just "suck a egg", ignore him and tolerate his presense. Either way, I ain't gonna be happy.

Maybe I go take a bike ride. Yeah, I think I will.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Happy birthday

Boy howdy, do the mind work in mysterious ways. Ya see, I were think'n bout if'n I should feel guilty or not when I push that publish button to post a new blog.  Ain't always what people want to hear and read about, or I offend somebody with all my nonsense. But should I feel guilty that I may lose a follower....God forbid that ever happen.

Ok, got "that bicycle" all modified just like I want it. Adjusted everthing to fit my old decrepit body. Gears shift smoothly, brakes work....it good to go. Took it for a little spin down the driveway an' back. I'm think'n it gonna be a good bicycle. Now it has got to have a name, just like "that jeep", "Sally da house" "Gracie" my 3 wood and "Sadie Mae". I'm open to suggestions, but be nice...Ok?

The bike carrier has been modified just like I said I were gonna do. Little hacksaw cut'n here an' there, swak'n with a big ol' hammer, a few extra nuts an' bolts....it good to go. "You da man Billy Bob". Did a test run on load'n "that bicycle" on the carrier. Shoot, that a piece of cake.

Got a big birthday party to go to tomorrow afternoon for the grandtwins Rainee an' Cooper. They gonna be 5 year old. Now the old Billy Bob ain't much for birthday parties an' stuff like that, but there gonna be a bunch of free food. Mexican food. Tortillas. Cake an' ice cream. Yum yum eat'em up. And I knows the cook real well.

Ok....got things to do.....may be back later with pics an' more nonsense. Damn it's hot out there.


Thursday, July 26, 2012


Have ya ever notice, like Trouble did at the doctors office, that if'n ya don't do things their way, ya ain't gonna get no service. With that said, this post could very easily turn into a political post. Know what I mean???

Anyhows, for those what are using Firefox, do you notice get'n a blank page what never loads when ya click on a blog? Well I do, and I've posted bout it before. Lately I've noticed Google is put'n a message up (little pop up thingy) what says Blogger ain't gonna work right on Firefox. So what's the deal with that??? Sounds like ya gotta use Google Chrome or ya ain't gonna get no service (see the doctor).

Ok...."what ya gonna do with that bicycle sit'n out there in the yard Billy Bob"??? Well shoot, I'm gonna modify that sucker, that what I'm gonna do. Take the fenders and that carrier thingy slap off. I been already look'n at 'lectric motor kits to put on it......go a hunnert mile a hour. Update on motor kits......damn, forget that.....$$$$$$.

The bike carrier thingy what fits into the receiver on the back "that jeep" will also be modified by Billy Bob & Company. I gonna make that sucker lay down, with the bike on it, so's I can open the lid of "that jeep" to get "bubba boat" an' accessories out. Also make it easier to load the bicycle. Roberts off to the hardware store pick'n up a heavy duty hinge. Will post pics later....onest I get it all figger out.

Now why the hell is the old Billy Bob don't feel'n good again? I were on a roll for a week of "piss an' vinigar" and yesterday's 4 hours shop'n trip wored me slap out. Got all winded and couldn't breath worth a crap. This morn'n I'm bout half ways to step'n off into my grave. Well, maybe I don't feel that bad. I could go out and swak some golf balls if'n wanted to....never give it a second thought.

Oh, did I mention I wreck that bicycle in K-Mart yesterday? Ya see, it were like this, I was riding down one the asiles and this lady pull out in front me with one them electric handicap cart thingys. To avoid a serious collision, I crash into some big ol' boxes full of expensive merchandise. I swear I had the right of way and she probly ran a stop sign to boot. Bicycles just ain't safe any more. Ain't got nuttin to do with age, so don't even go there.

Ok....got things to do. Laters.

Boy howdy it were hot out there.....101 degs.
Next photo will be "that bicycle", what ain't got no name yet, on the back of "that jeep", what do have a name...POS.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Wild hair

Have ya ever got a wild hair an' say ya gonna do something before ya give that wild hair some serious think'n?

For a few days I been think'n I need to go out an' buy me a new boat.  I got me this wild hair of a great big ol' 4 man raft....bout the size a US Navy aircraft carrier. 
I ain't say'n I ain't gonna go head and buy one, but when ya do some think'n bout it, that when ya realize it ain't a intelligent decision. For a bunch of reasons. First, where the hell I gonna put a big ol' boat when I ain't got hardly enough room for the little "bubba boat"? Then it gonna weigh twice as much as do the "bubba boat". Then I gonna have to buy me another motor with twice the horsepower what I got now. And a bigger and heavier battery. I'm think'n I probly aughter just pluck this wild hair out my head an' give the "bubba boat" a big ol' hug. What ya think???

Now let's talk bout that other wild hair, a bicycle. Yeah, the old Billy Bob surely could use some bicycle peddling exercise. Ok, now let's do some think'n bout that. "Where the hell ya gonna put a big ol' 26 inches bicycle Billy Bob"? Well shoot, I gonna put it on the back of "that jeep", that's where. That takes a special bike carrier what folds down to gain access to the "bubba boat" and associated gear what is in the back. Well I fount what I'm think'n is a purty darn nice bicycle for an old fart like me. It's kind of big, but I'm think'n I'll grow into it in no time flat.
Schwinn Riverside

I sit on that sucker and it feel good, light and comfortable....feet reach to the floor. Ain't gonna fall over like I do on them mountain bikes. I took off down the aisle and the nice man stop me an' says..."Whoa there cowboy, you can't ride no bicycle in K-Mart". Ok, so here's the deal. How I gonna put a hunnert horsepower 'lectric motor on that sucker? Bet ya Billy Bob figger it out.

Home alone today. Robert an' grandson Tim took off on a job way early this morn'n. "Now what ya gonna do Billy Bob"?

For Dizzy....

Monday, July 23, 2012


Have ya ever buy something and while you was buy'n it had this feel'n....sucker? Ya see, yesterday we went off to the flea market just down the road a piece. A BIG flea market with all kind of tempting stuff to buy. Well, I were in the market for a new flashlight. One what I could see in the dark with.

Sit'n there on this table is a cool look'n flashlight what says "Police" on the side it. Now this is got to be a good 'un. Rechargable batter, 2 chargers, and adjustable high intensity beam of blind'n light. I wheeled and dealed an' got that sucker for $15....yee ha. I could be on DirecTV on one them barter programs. Well anyhows....the damn thing don't work. "Sucker".

Ok, enough of Billy Bob get'n trimmed by a soft talk'n oriental at the flea market. Went off to Academy the other day (couple days ago). Just look'n ya know. Bought me up a couple bass fish lures for when I get back to the Texas lakes. Gonna get that 14 pounder this year for sure.

Funny, here it is the middle of summer and I already think'n bout winter. No I ain't think'n bout no cold weather....snow an' stuff like that. I'm think'n south Texas where it's gonna be warm every day and catch'n me up a bunch of fish. Lay'n back in the sunshine while the rest of the country is freez'n their buttock (ass) off.....do'n nuttin.

Grandson Nick says to me...."Papaw, what's Bubba Boat look like blowed up"? Well shoot Nick, blow it up. Oh Oh, Billy Bob done mess up. Inside the rolled up "Bubba Boat" was moisture from 3 months ago. It don't seem to be rotted, but I won't know for sure till I'm out there in the middle of a lake somewheres. Probably gonna fall apart, gonna sink an' I gonna drown. With that thought in mind, I been look'n at other blow up fish'n boats. Done fount me one what is bigger than the "bubba boat" and will carry 4 people, and Sadie Mae, to the fish'n grounds. Sounds like another project to me. What ya think?

With all the projects and repairs on "Sally da house" and "that jeep" finished, I been get'n a rash on my buttocks (ass) from sit' round do'n nuttin. Oh don't be get'n me wrong now, I DO like sit'n on my ass do'n nuttin. It's just the big ol' blisters what bother me.

Speak'n of blisters an' stuff like that....I been feel'n pretty damn good for the last week. But here what I'm think'n....I been do'n some the cook'n for the crew in the last week. Been sleep'n good at night....except'n for the night after swak'n golf balls an' fall'n on my buttocks (ass). Life is good.

Been look'n at bicycles again. I'm think'n I'm need'n me some exercise. That could be my project for today huh? Find a bicycle shop here in Georgia....take a look see. "Google is your best friend". Maybe find me one with a hunnert horse power motor on it for get'n back home when I get wored slap out. What ya think?

Ain't got a thing to do today that I can think of. Well, that ain't exactly true. Still got a couple little chores on the "to do" list and all them tools are still out there in there garage to be put up. I'm think'n bout unload'n bout a hunnert pound of them tools to Robert. "What the hell ya need a table saw for Billy Bob"? I got WAY too many tools. Don't use them nohows anymore. Got me a brand spank'n new generator back there I been tote'n round what ain't been started for the last almost 4 years. Ain't got no use in the world for it no more. Unless I buy me a tent an' go camp'n. And that ain't gonna happen.

Ok....got things to do.....laters.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

New water leak

Yesterdays post was fun. Some times I get all wind up and turn loose with my feelings and thoughts. Yesterday it just happen to be a bit funny....depend'n how ya look at it.

Well anyhows.....you remember me say a couple times before that when I bought "that jeep", I had made a mistake.....right? Well, if'n ya remember that, you should remember a few days ago when I had installed a brand spank'n new a/c compressor on "that jeep". My son "accidently" (with the assistance of a few Bud Lights) blowed some the refrigerant into the atmosphere. I re-hooks up my guages, pop a top on a new can of R-134a and proceed to "fix" the situation. "Hot damn Billy Bob, it blow'n cold air". So's I sits down in my comfortable camp chair, sip'n a cup, chest pooched out a bit, admir'n my expertise. What the hell is that??? There water drip'n under "that jeep". This is where your memory comes into play. Always something new breaks on "that jeep".....right?

I grabs up a flashlight and go inspect'n possible causes of water fall'n out of "that jeep". "There it are Billy Bob, right there....that hose". I'll give ya a second to ponder on a leak'n water hose.....leak'n water hoses not a problem right? Well take a guess where that water hose is at. Yup, you right.....up under that brand spank'n new compressor and behind that big ol' mounting bracket. Major take stuff apart....compressor, compressor mount bracket, alternator and the alternator mount bracket. Hoses, belts....all kind of stuff in the way. All for a $3 freak'n crossover water hose an' a gallon antifreeze. It back together. No leak. Still blow cold air and "that jeep" is finished.

I ain't knock'n preppers, but damn!!! Latest news from the "prepper squad" is that everybody gonna starve to death from our latest drought. I agree that when crops die from nuttin to drink (drought), there gonna be a shortage and prices is gonna rise. But damn....ya ain't gonna starve to death. Preppers remind me of the "tree huggers" from a few years back who was driv'n steel spikes in trees, caus'n death an' maim'n of loggers and saw mill workers. Preppers are buy'n up the food supply (spikes) what they gonna end up throw'n in the dumpster down the road a piece. I better get off'n this subject cause it piss'n me off. Damn!!!

Ya know what? I ain't got a damn thing to do today. Well I do, but I ain't gonna do it. Ya see, my son said we was gonna go to the flea market this morn'n. Ha....does he know that this morn'n is plumb gone. It's freak'n time to eat lunch. That boy.....boy howdy!!!

Ok, I'm done. Laters.

Friday, July 20, 2012

What next....water???

Holy crap. I done read me a blog this morn'n what says I'm gonna die if'n I keep put'n sugar in my coffee. It don't say nuttin bout when I'm gonna die, just that if'n I keep up this sinful act, I'm a goner for sure. But you know, the old Billy Bob ain't gonna believe all this hog wash bout what ya sposed to eat an' drink an' stuff like that. Ya see, the way I see it is that there is a bunch of anti-sugar anti-real food corporations out there try'n to scare everbody into using their "chemical" poisons as a sweetener for coffee and such.....Splenda, Sweet N' Low, NutraSweet....them kind of stuff ....what gonna give ya cancer. Don't trust the Government, or whatever, when it comes to a good cup of coffee. Hog wash...that what it is. What's next??? Don't drink the water???

Damn, that was fun......but I ain't done yet. Ya see, it's like this....I'm a 70 years old man. Ain't a thing wrong with me what ain't wrong with most everbody else my age. Ok, let me see....I got a bad back. It sure as hell weren't caused by something what I ate or drinked. Or because I don't walk a hunnert mile a day. It were cause by my be'n a dumb ass try'n to pick up a 2 man hunnert pounds load. You know, macho thing..."I can pick that up". Now I spose somebody gonna tell me the correct way to pick stuff up....right? Well, there ain't but one way to pick stuff up. Just grab holt to it, pick it up and go. Simple as that. Although, it ain't gonna hurt ya none if'n ya get ya some good strong help.

Then there the heart attack thing. I heared that if'n ya eat butter an' hog fat, ya gonna have a massive heart attack an' you gonna die right now. Ya don't really believe that crap do ya??? Ya see, I been eat'n butter an' hog fat, half cooked meat, white bread, sugar, half a gallon coffee every day, all my life....long with a bunch of other weird stuff.....and of course I ain't dead yet.
Every doctor in the world gonna tell ya cigarettes is the cause of lung cancer, high blood pressure, headaches and ingrowed toenails. That ain't so. If'n it were, I would have migraines, off the scale blood pressure and the ugliest toenails ya ever did see. Although, I have cut my consumption of "smokes" in half or more and switched to "puff'n" little cigars a few years back. Thought bout "chaw backie", but that crap makes me plumb green sick.

Now bout my stomach problems. It ain't 'cause of what I been eat'n all these years...it 'cause of my X wife. Not the one here in Georgia, but the other one. My God, that woman would eat the porcelain slap off'n a porcelain cook'n pot. Doctor tole me that. Said I had to either get a divorce or move to another State just to get away from her.
Ok....I take aspirin for my back pains. Somebody gonna tell me aspirin will eat holes in your stomach. So will all them other wanna be aspirin replacement chemicals. Read the labels. Aspirin works and the others don't. So what would you take?

"Yeee Haaa Billy Bob, you is on a roll"

I were tell'n my son when we got back from golf ball swak'n that my back was gonna be hurt'n.....took a aspirin. Well it did. All day long yesterday. But it's back to a normal hurt this morn'n. I sure would hate to have to give up golf ball swak'n. Speak'n of hurt, I were stand'n on the side a hill gonna swak that golf'n ball a hunnert mile. That hill were slick just like my sandals was slick. I rares back for a spectacular shot, feet slides down the hill and I fall slap on my ass....ball go right over there bout 25 yards. 

Ok....got things to do....laters.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Is later better than never?

Now that's a question I ain't even gonna try to answer. Or am I????

I'm gonna rekon that wait'n for someone to make a blog post every morn'n is like wait'n for the mailman with your Government check......where the hell is the mailman? When I waked up this morn'n I was gonna make a post bout all kind of nonsense. Rattle some your brains. But I got all tied up in read'n others blogs and the news, an' stuff like that, that I plumb didn't have any more time. So here I are late in the afternoon in an attempt to astonish my followers with what ever comes to mind. Lately that ain't been much. But that don't mean I ain't been think'n bout stuff....ya know.

Ha.....ya didn't think the old Billy Bob had it in him no more did ya? Well let me tell ya, I can still swak a freak'n golf ball close to a mile. Well maybe not quite that far, but it go way down the road a piece. Took Robert and my reckless grandson Tim to the golf ball swak'n place this afternoon. I were think'n I weren't gonna have a good day cause of my last round with OFM Barney bout 8 moth ago. But let me tell ya, I had a great day of golf ball swak'n. On the front nine, I struck a disgraceful 49, what give me the indication I were gonna have me a terrible round of golf. But on the back nine, I done make me some changes in my strategy, tactics and mind functions. Hit a very decent 40 for a grand total of 89 wonderful strokes. Struck me up a birdie on the last hole, 159 yds par 3, us'n my trusty 5 wood set to stop at 156.5 yds and my automatic "in da hole" putter. Damn....that were fun.

Last night we went out to eat at some dive Kenny Rogers invested some his money in. Well, let me tell ya, if'n you're ever in Douglasville, Ga. an' you see Kenny's Buffet.....don't eat there....I mean it. It were terrible. The fried maters was all greasy. The fried chicken was dry like cardboard. My salad consisted of nuttin but wilted an' wring'n wet lettuce and the worstest ranch dress'n ya ever tasted. Where the damn maters, bell peppers, mushrooms, radishes and stuff like that? An' all ya get to eat with is a cheap fork....no knife, no spoon...an' one chintzy napkin for all that grease??? Don't go there....I mean it.

Ok....gotta go. Robert done conned me into cook'n supper. Hamburger steak, burned onions, boiled taters, corn and brown gravy....along with a generous portion of fresh home growed mater slices. Yum boy howdy. 

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Sally got new shoes

Boy howdy. It get'n to where I just don't care no more. I ain't had nuttin excit'n to think bout for the last 2 weeks that I would write about. Nuttin but just every day survival.

The other day we was sit'n out back talk'n bout everything I touch been turn'n to poop. That weren't my exact words, but you know what I'm talk'n bout. I've had my share of "poop" this trip to Georgia an' it ain't been one my best trips. Although....a lot had been accomplished on "da house". Much of which turned into poop. Poor decisions....or listen'n to my inexperienced sons?

What am I talk'n bout ya might ask. Well let me tell ya....take the compressor for "that jeep". To save a couple dollars, I buyed me up a rebuilt compressor instead of a brand spank'n new one. That was OK, untill I figger out there weren't no gasket (earlier post). I fix that right up. Then I installed the compressor, purged the system, evacuated and pour 2 cans of refrigerant in it. Crank up the engine and the damn a/c don't work. What the hell? Cycling on low pressure switch an' low discharge pressure. Anyhows...the refrigerant weren't go'n through the system components....it's blocked somewheres with that "poop" I was tell'n ya bout. OK.....only two places can block the flow of refrigerant....the orfice and an' oil blockage at the bottom of the condenser. Anyhows, the old Billy Bob knowed what to do and he did it. Got that sucker cool'n just like a brand spank'n new one. Well that is till my "helpful" son decided to remove the guages what I tole him not to. Blowed refrigerant, oil and ultra violet leak detection dye all over the place. Why don't sons listen to their daddy? "Put sum freon in it Billy Bob".

Yesterday morn'n me and son Billy took a cruise down to the tire sell'n place to verify "Sally's" shoes were in stock and accessibility...."Sally da house" is big ya know. The nice guy says I can bring it in bout 3pm....what we did. Three guys jump in there an' change them Michelins with Dunlap RoadMasters quick as a flash. Sally got new shoes.....an' my wallet is 2 inches skinnier. But...I should never have to change tires again for another 6 to 10 years.

Damn, gotta make a Walmart run. I'm slap out of coffee, milk, bread....ain't got nuttin to eat. Any other time I would be all "excitis" bout a trip to Walmart, but here lately, I don't want to go nowheres. Not even my favorite Walmart store. "Sumthing wrong with you Billy Bob".
Am I get'n old or something like that?

For the last month I ain't feel worth a poop. No energy, freak'n back and hip hurt all the time, stomach been mess up for 2 week.....damn, I'm fall'n apart. Been tak'n aspirin for my back an' hip pains and acid blockers for my stomach....along with a gob of Alka Seltzer. What helps for a little while.
Am I get'n old or something like that?

Ok, got things to do....laters.

Saturday, July 14, 2012

How do ya blog?

Boy howdy, things sure are get'n skimpy to write about. What got me to think'n.....how do bloggers write their blogs.

I been notice many bloggers use cut an' paste to make a post and ya don't see or hear from them again till tomorrow morn'n. I ain't say'n cut an' paste don't make for some good read'n....long as it's informative in some way. I also been notice that many bloggers ain't gonna post nuttin to their personal lives or their daily activities. Ain't nuttin wrong with that neither. I just find these kind of blogs less interest'n than ones what give ya a perspective of daily life.

I try my derndest to give my readers a view of what it's like to live at Billy Bob's house. I don't tell ya everthing I do, but I paint a pretty good picture from time to time. You know, like sit'n in a bar half lit up talk'n to a complete stranger sit'n next to ya.....that what I do. Most my readers what been here for a while knows all bout the old Billy Bob and his antics. Some boring, some interesting and some just plain ol' nonsense.

Speak'n of blogs, I'm gonna bet ya a buck I read more blogs ever morn'n than most ya do. Not only the ones I got listed over there on the side, but ones I read off'n someone elses blog....I link read. Rekon I got too much free time on my hands huh??? And then I read the news ever morn'n too. And Facebook, what has turn into nuttin but silly drama. Ain't nuttin wrong with a little drama in your life....right? Facebook sucks!!!

The rain yesterday put a halt on install'n the compressor on "that jeep". But guess what? Sunshine today, got my shoes on an' all fired up to go to work. Well maybe not really all fired up, but I want to "git 'er done" an' move on to something else. Like my final "cut list".....to do stuff. Ain't add nuttin to it in a week. Yee ha!!!

When I was plan'n this trip, I knowed I was gonna "fix" stuff, but I also had planned on a few adventures too. Well I ain't been on a adventure yet. Been all work an' no play......or sit'n on my buttocks (ass) "do'n nuttin". But I sure ain't gonna be do'n no complain'n. I gonna have me a brand spank'n new motorhome when I head back west.

Ok....got things to do...see ya laters.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Not much left to do....

Oh no, it's Saturday again.....ain't it???
Update....hell no it ain't Saturday....it's Friday......DUH!!!!

Well shoot, even thought it rained on the boys while they was repacking the front wheel bearings, they "got 'er done". Little bit of water ain't never hurt nobody.

Now let me tell ya bout air conditioning. I brung that new compressor back from the parts sell'n place and tells grandson Tim to put it on "that jeep. What he did. Then he says...."grandpa where the gasket"? There weren't no gasket.....it gonna leak. "Tim, take 'er back off". Back to the auto parts sell'n place....still no gasket 'cept'n for the old one. "So what ya gonna do now Billy Bob" (used old gasket with RTV silicone under it). Today we (Tim) will tighten the fitting and reinstall the compressor for the 3rd time. Anyhows, the missing gasket woke up the sleep'n giant "the popster"....and he were grouchy as all git out for the next 2 hour. Everything look'n better this morn'n through the eyes of Billy Bob.

It's look'n like this fall and winter is gonna be somewhat like what it was last winter. A trip around Texas and final destination, catch'n up big ol' bass at Falcon Lake in south Texas. Sound like a winner to me. Thought bout go'n to the slabs this winter, but I done been there 3 winters, so it wouldn't be nuttin new. Same ol' people and nuttin to do.

Wonder'n what the gas prices will be for the rest of the year. It done went up here in Ga. to $3.29 in the last week. "Sally da house" uses a lot of gas, right at 8.2 mile a gallon. Boy howdy, with bout 3000 miles to go to get back to south Texas, that gonna be a big expense. But when ya think bout it, you got your house with ya and a big "Yellow" taxi hook up to the back porch. Like somebody tell me the other day...."it's only money, ya can't take it with ya". 

Ok.....that's all I got for now. Here's wish'n ever one of ya to have a good week end. Laters!!!

Thursday, July 12, 2012

"The popster"...bah humbug

Boy howdy!!! Sit'n out there on "da porch" sip'n up a cup and think'n sure do wonders for a stale brain.

We been hav'n a bunch of rain for the last couple days, so anything I had to do, had to be done inside. Well, I sure weren't gonna bring no greasy car parts in "da house" to work on.....so, I didn't do nuttin. Well I did, but it's unimportant to mention here. "You ly'n Billy Bob...you didn't do nuttin".

Did I ever tell ya bout the time....I had me 3 different personalities. I probably still do but just don't pay no attention to the others no more. If'n ya didn't know, I weren't borned as Billy Bob. I acquired that name. When I were a littly boy, everbody call me Billy. After time I got used to it and still answer to it today. Where the hell Bob come from I don't know. If'n I had been called Walter, or something like that, I could be rich, driv'n me up a brand spank'n new Cadillac motorhome (Prevost). Anyhows....done got off subject here, "Billy Bob" is the main subject of our conversation today. He's the guy what makes all the important decisions....after consultation with "William" and "the popster".

Well yesterday, "the popster" done upset the apple cart. You know how old folks are....right? We was discuss'n them new tires for "da house" again. I (Billy Bob) says we need to go to the tire sell'n place an' buy up some new ones. But "the popster" (grouchy old bastard) shakes his head an' says...."there ain't nuttin wrong these tire 'cept'n for a few little cracks". Since I were learned to listen to my elders, whether grouchy or not, he almost had me persuaded to forget all bout the tires and take my chances. That when "William" (the smart one) jump in with his 2 cents....."them tires is 9 year old an' they gonna blow slap up, bounce off'n the side a 18 wheeler and go in a ditch...tear "Sally da house and "that jeep" all to hell". Todays mission is to go tire hunt'n....soon as Robert get his ass out of bed. That boy sleep too much.

Speak'n of hunt'n, I had grandson Tim take that compressor back off'n "that jeep". The damn thing was leak'n oil and freon all over the place. After close examination....I do that ya know, it was found that the back housing plate has a small crack in it. Now how the hell that happen? By tomorrow afternoon I should have a brand spank'n new air cond. compressor installed on "that jeep". What gonna break next?

Had a talk with old "pesky neighbor" Wayne yesterday. He been back in the hospital a couple more times. Had to pump out his lungs.,,,or something like that. Now he's is on lung therapy through a lung specialist up in Silver City. Poor old boy is hav'n a rough time of it.

Afternoon update....
Went to the parts sell'n place this morn'n and ordered a compressor for "that jeep". Will be here right bout 3pm today. Then we went off look'n at tires. My God, we looked for bout 2 hours before we fount the right place. Got a few prices and bout 3 different options. Michelin versus Michelin versus Toyo versus Dunlap versus Road Master. Road Master was chosen.

Damn big dog. Come in "da house" jump'n up an' down put scratches all over "that floor".....GRRRRRRRRRR, piss me off. Now this was a big dog and big dogs make big scratches. Bout 4 days work to "fix". GRRRRRRRRRRRR........damn dog.

Ok, it's rain'n....got the boys out there repack'n the front wheels. Monkey what??? Hee hee, it's kind of funny. Brake pads look pretty good for 36,000 miles, but....the inside pad is wored more than the outside pad....each wheel. I never seen this before. Anybody ever see this????

Monday, July 9, 2012

Damn I'm bored slap out

I didn't tell ya this, but I tore that a/c compressor slap out of "that jeep". The damn thing leaked.....even after I put some that guaranteed leak stopper stuff in it.

"Now what ya gonna do Billy Bob"??? Well shoot, I gonna go down the street to the air condition'n compressor sell'n place and buy me up a brand spank'n new one.....that what I'm gonna do. Sure do hurts my pride that I couldn't fix the damn thing myself, but after tak'n it apart one time and it still leak, it's time for a new one. Ya see, ya can't just go out and buy new "o" rings for a compressor...ya know. Actually they ain't "o" rings. They is "square" rings. Who ever thought of put'n square "o" rings on a compressor???? Ain't that the same as put'n a square peg on a round hole? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Anyhows......"what ya been do'n Billy bob"? Well shoot, I ain't been do'n nuttin. Dad blasted TV got me mezmarized....or something like that. Been stay'n up till the wee hours watch'n stupit stuff. I don't even like TV.....what the hell I do'n watch'n it?

Speak'n of TV, when I live on the boat, I ordered me up one them there DirecTV thingys. When the monthly cost got to $47 a month, I throwed all that stuff slap in the dumpster. My son Robert got me hook up to his DirecTV and there ain't nuttin but commercials every 8 minutes or so. That right there is all it took for the old Billy Bob to make the decision he weren't gonna fall into another DirecTV trap. An' ya ain't go no choice of what ya gonna watch neither......junk, that what it is.....junk. If'n it was me run'n things, DirecTV would give ya a choice of program'n. Cost ya bout a nickle, or a quarter, for each channel ya choose. Sound good to me.

Boy howdy.....old age sure is catch'n up to me real quick like. All my hopes, wants an' desires are just sit'n there look'n at me as to say..."well"???? I don't rekon 70 year old is really old. But when you got a back what been mess up for 30 years, 70 year old is old. Sure would like to wake up one morn'n and not feel like I slept with a butcher knife in my back. Then have to stumble my way to the coffee pot for my morning dose of "fixer up" caffeine. Then after a couple hours sit'n on my buttocks, finally be able to get up and move around an' do something. That sucks ya know.

Ok....got things to do. "How bout put'n all them tools away Billy Bob"??? Maybe today, maybe not.

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Still alive

I ain't done nuttin. That's what I been do'n.

Friday, July 6, 2012

Prep this....

Dag nab it, what are people think'n? I remember a time when old prospectors drinked mercury followed by a shot of whiskey. Ain't none of 'em died from mercury. They died of gun shots wounds, fall'n down a hunnert foots mine shaft, got kickied in the head by a burro....or something like that. Then here come a bunch of burrocrats claim'n that mercury will kill ya. Everbody believed it an' quit drink'n the stuff. Then there is lead paint. My god, I ate a ton that stuff when I were teeth'n as a young'un. Now days "they" (whoever they is) is try'n to outlaw lead fish weights and shot gun pellets.

Allergies......hogwash. Don't care what ya say, allergies is hogwash. Weren't no such thing back when we all played outside, ate mud pies and romped through the woods with our old flea infested dog. Television, video games and cell phones....that what it is. No body goes outside. Or if'n you was to take a closer look, it ain't pollen from flowers and stuff like that....it's the crap we are put'n in the air. Chemicals and stuff. I member one time when I live across the street from Monsanto. Got me a new paint job out that deal. Discharged chemicals done ate holes in my paint. Way to go chemical companies.

Preppers is what scares me. These are the people what is scared to death that the world is com'n to a end.....maybe tomorrow. Stock up (hoard) everything from can groceries to toilet paper....tons of the stuff. I went off this morn'n read'n some "prepper" blogs. I says...."what the hell"? Don't need to be tell'n ya what I'm think'n bout all that. Hog wash!!! If'n ya want a can of green beans, go to the damn grocery store an' buy a can.

Ok....I'm done with all that. Good morn'n!!!! I'm think'n it gonna be another hot day here in west Georgia. A/C is already crank'n out cold air. Might gonna be a inside day of reinstall'n all the stuff I took out "da house" last week. I ain't look'n forward to that. There stuff lay'n everwheres. And tools...."my God Billy Bob, look at that pile of tools ya got to put up".

As you can see, I don't have much to say this morn'n. Sooo, I'm out of here...got things to do ya know.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Blog whoa's

Well shoot, what the hell we gonna talk bout today? Ain't offen I run out of stuff to talk about ya know.....but....

Ya ain't gonna beleive it.....Sadie May done put a scratch in the brand spank'n new "that floor". Ya see, it's like this....we was com'n in to "da house" last night an' she were all excitis bout something....go slid'n cross the floor....leave a skid mark. Now where the hell are her fingernail clippers? I don't like trim'n her nails 'cause I worry bout go'n too far and make her scream. Ain't no ways I gonna again take her to a groomer to have it done. First they do the same thing I do. Cut off bout a eigth inches. Then they hands me back my dog long with a big ol' bill for their services. All in bout 5 minutes. Nope....ain't no way.

Ok here's the deal. It's hard enough to sit down and write a blog post what might be interesting to everbody. You cain't please everbody with every blog ya write. Thoughts, desires and interests ain't all the same. So how the hell do ya write a blog what everybody wants to read? I've tried every angle I can think of to maintain followers....except sports and politics. I can't do it. Followers come and go. "Suck it up Billy Bob".

Speak'n of followers, I got lots of followers I would like to meet up with in person and spend some quality time with. Some I done had the pleasure to meet up with and they on my "to visit again" list. Are you on my list???

Ain't got much to say bout comments. Sometimes I do....sometimes I don't. But....I read all the blogs. I'm like everbody else....I like to see comments, but I don't always comment. Catch my drift???

Now what the hell is wrong with Billy Bob. For the last 4 or 8 days, everything I eat, I get sick. Not puk'n sick, but I sure don't feel good. Think'n maybe it has something to do with all the stress an' pull'n my hair out is caus'n it. Why sure us retired people have stress if'n ya didn't know. We got lots of important stuff to think bout ya know. Even "road fever" can cause stress. Mine is com'n from all the stuff still on my "to do" list and what little time I have left to "git 'er done". I rekon I probably aughter get off my butt and do something...huh?

Ok....need to crank up "that jeep and go to the auto parts sell'n place. Got to buy me up some freon and oil for the a/c. Yeah....that what I gonna do. 

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

"that floor"

I'm think'n everbody is gonna be hear'n bout "that floor" for years to come. If'n I've said it once, I'm gonna say it again......Oh....just nevermind. Only thing I got to say is "don't".

Put the last and final coat of polyurethane on "that floor" yesterday. I'm done with it. Finished. Don't never wanna see another wood floor long as I live. Geeese......!!!! Now I'm gonna buy me up a bunch of rugs an' stuff to cover it up. "What was you think'n Billy Bob"???? Pretty girl catch your eye every time and most times is a mistake.

Son Billy the cop come by for a visit yesterday. We sit out there under the shade thingy sip'n up a cup and talk'n up a storm bout danc'n girls, trucks an' cars and break'n stuff. Ya see, when Billy was a little boy, he was the toy terror....or anything else he laid his hands on. If'n it weren't broke, when he finish look'n at it, it were broke. There was a time when daddy bought up some Tonka Toys. You know, the indestructible ones. Much thought went into which kid got which toy. The dump trunk had only one moving part....a perfect match for Billy. After two loads of dirt and sand, the dump truck was history. Billy had struck. Bent axles and the dump thingy tore slap off.....nuttin left but a cab and 2 bent axles. Tonka Toys is no match for my Billy.

I have to admit, I think I'm get'n too damn old. Wore plumb slap out. Ye see, it's like this....I been watch'n myself through all this remodel/modification/maintenance work and I cain't do all that crap no more. If'n I get down on the floor to measure something, by the time I get back up, I done forgit what the measurement was. Or I got to have somebody help me get back up. Some times I think it's time to be put out to pasture like a old cow what outlived it's use. Time to find me a chunk of land and plant my ass next to a stream with a fish pole in one hand....a cup of coffee in the other. Never figgered this day would come.

Don't read too much into what I just said....I gonna feel better tomorrow.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Give 'em hell Billy Bob

Boy howdy....another project. Got Robert and Tim lay'n pavers at the back porch. Ya see, it was like this....there were some old warped and rotted boards used as pavers and I decided the boys gonna dig them boards up an' throws them in the dumpster. Sent them off to Walmart to buy up some concrete pavers an' some sand. Gonna be a professional job when the old Billy Bob show 'em how to do it.

What can be hard bout lay'n pavers? Well let me tell ya. Ya got to have a nice level foundation to lay them on, covered with bout a inches or so of sand. Now if'n you was here watch'n grandson Timothy try'n to level the ground, you would see why I throwed up my arms and walk slap off'n the job. Damn Tim, it's simple.

Hot damn, weather is back to normal. Right at 94 degs here in the State of Georgia. That blasted heat wave what come through here like to have kill me. Had to stay inside all day watch'n TV....thermostat set on 75. Yee Haa.....it were cool in "da house". It's cloudy today so maybe it gonna rain. Not that I want rain or anything like that, but it would give me a test run on if'n the slide out is gonna leak or not after caulking the roof of it. Not would make me very happy and proud. Come on rain, I dares ya.

I ain't got a damn thing to talk bout today. That is unless ya wanna here some more bout the "that floor". Notice I says "that floor". Remember when I bought up "that jeep"? It was a mistake and "that jeep" got the name as a sarcastic remark 'cause it's a piece of crap. Now I named my floor for the same reason...."that floor". Two mistakes don't make a right. Anyhows....started slap'n on another coat of polyurethane on "that floor" and it look'n good again. Can still see the imperfections, but what the hell.....I'm done with this friggin nightmare.

Ok....things to do ya know.....laters.

LOL....update on pavers.....another nightmare. Robert done took over. What he think he do'n, pour'n concrete??? Set'n forms an' stuff. LOLOLOL.....funny.

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Run'n out of time

Boy howdy, why do I wake up in a grouchy mood when I know I ain't got nuttin to be grouchy about. Yup, today is gonna be one them days. I've got myself in a bind mess'n with stuff I should have left alone.

Back to the floor, the one issue I would like to forget. A test was performed on a new piece of flooring. The result indicated the can of polyurethane is contaminated.
It seems now that the gallon can of polyurethane is contaminated with itty bitty dust particles and great big ol' dog hairs. Ya see, it's like this....Robert took over the task of slop'n on the final coat of finish on the floor. What turned out to be "nasty". What I spent an entire day sanding out all the imperfections I could.....with a bunch of "greenies". I now have a smooth floor with no finish coat on it. Never, and I stress NEVER, cover an open can of polyurethane with the same rag you are using to wipe up dirt, dust, sand and dog hairs. "Now what ya gonna do Billy Bob"?

Now you can see why I get a bit grouchy from time to time. But that's not the only reason a person would be grouchy this early in the morning. Nothing is getting finished like I had planned. The wheel bearings on "Sally da house" are still not repacked and more than likely won't be. The grease job and engine maintenance has not been performed....and more than likely won't be. The tires are still not replaced and more than likely won't be. The slide out awning cover is still lay'n on the floor in the garage. The full day of working on "that jeep" is more than likely a complete loss. Something ain't go'n 'cord'n to plan.

Ok, if'n you been follow'n Billy Bob's blog long enough, you know he gonna be fine tomorrow. All smiles, jump'n up an' down, run'n round the block an' stuff like that. Right???

Speak'n run'n round the block, did I ever tell ya bout the time.......
It were way back when I were just a young feller in Port Aransas, Texas. Bout the same time the hippies was head'n off to some wild an' crazy concert up in New York...or somewheres like that. I had spend the night before out on the town with the boys....drink'n beer and "hoot'n" it up. I had me a headache, sick as a dog.....grouchy. XX wife was flap'n her jaws an' giv'n me hell. I jumps up chase her nag'n ass slap out the house to the front porch. She stand out there mak'n fun the old Billy Bob an' stuff like that. "Na na na you can't get me". Like hell I can't......out the door I flys ....neekid a jay bird, chas'n her down the street with a pitcher full ice water I gonna toss on her. Holy crap, there was people all over the place giggl'n and laugh'n....point'n fingers an' stuff....an' I ain't got a stitch of clothes on....Wilber flap'n in the breeze.
Hee hee....that were funnier than hell. 

Ok, let's see what today brings the old Billy Bob. Laters.