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Sunday, October 25, 2015

Not much go'n on....

This is a bad time to be writ'n stuff on a blog. Ya see, we have rain headed this way an' as everbody know, the old Billy Bob ain't in no close friendship deal with rain storms. I ain't got no garden, so I don't need none that wet stuff. I'm a sunshine kind of guy.

An' speak'n of sunshine, man boy howdy we had us some here in Georgia. The dad gum air cond has been run'n every afternoon. Musta been a hunnert degs....or there bouts. Had to open them redneck winder blankets so's some the heat would go back outside. Hotter inside than outside.

Have ya ever have a endoscopy? Stick a water hose down yer throat an' take a hunnert digital pictures. Well that ain't so bad, 'cause they inject some stuff in ya an' you go to sleep. But let me tell ya bout the day before. Holy cows....drink a gallon Gatorade an' water. I hate Gaterade an' I don't like water one iota. Ya don't get nuttin to eat for a whole freak'n day. Ya cain't have ya no chew bakkee or Skoal under yer lip neither. Any obstructions to the bathroom must be cleared beforehand.
This is what I got to look forward to for the next three days.

Have ya ever builded a "cutwater"? Ok, so ya don't know what a cutwater is. Well, I'm bout to tell ya. Ya see, back when boats was builded out of wood, the hull planking was nailed at a point at the front the boat....like this /\. Go'n through the water a hunnert mile a hour, that was a weak spot an' all them pound'n waves on that weak spot, your wooden boat is gonna fall slap apart....an' sink. So some thoughtful dude invented a cutwater. Builded out of stainless steel so's them nails hold'n the boat together won't come out...an' sink yer boat. A cutwater looks like this.... /\ .....or this.


The cutwater from the kit is made out of stick on tin foil stuff what ya cut with a pair of sizzers (scissors). For a model, this looks kind of sorta ok. But, for the old Billy Bob, this won't do....."let's build one". A special drill bit was used to drill all them holes. Trick of the trade here....a big ass needle an' a hammer. (them holes are bout 1/64th inches) Just big enough to fit a straight pin through. Straight pins will be "fake" screws without the slot. Look pretty good from my house.

Ok crap, Leonard has turn into a killer cat. He done go outside this morn'n an' murdered a mocking bird. Bringed it in "da house" to show off his hunt'n skills. Cats do that ya know. Me an' Leonard had us a talk. Hope he don't find his way into the chicken house. I killed a chicken one time. But we ate it.

Speak'n of chicken, did I ever tell ya....I raised a chicken puppy an' a cat puppy. Them two play with each other from when they wake up until they get tired an' take a afternoon nap. Chase each other all over the house. I comes home from school one day an' my daddy had bringed a jail buddy home with him. My poor chicken was in a pot on the stove. That bastard stealed my radio too. An' hocked it for a bottle of beer an' a pack of smokes at the little grocery store. Costed me 2 hours of sweep'n an' scrub'n floors just to get my radio back.   

Oh shoot, I almost forget. The boat needs a name. A unique name. I spended bout 14 hour look'n at boat names on the internet. My God, you ain't gonna believe what people name boats. I got me a list of possibilities. Yes, "Billy Boat" is on the list. I could use some help in choos'n a name....what ya got? Here is what I'm think'n....."LONE STAR". That's Texas in case ya didn't know.


In place of Steakhouse an' Saloon....TEXAS. Just a thought.

But, I still like "Billy Boat". "Wooden Eagle" or Falcon or Nickle? "Barco de Billy"?

I have nuttin else to write about...I'm out of here.



13 comments:

  1. Aren't boats suppose to have feminine names? Well, maybe not. Don't we have some boats in the USN named after presidents? (That should get all the sailors stirred up!) I like either 'Billy Boat' or 'Lone Star'.

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    Replies
    1. Billy boat or Barco de Billy sound about right to me.

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  2. Only boat I ever named was a canoe. Named it Paddleboat.

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  3. My throat has never been the same since an endoscopy a couple of years ago. Always scratchy and I think I have to cough. I think the terms of service on Blogspot won't allow me to print what I would say to a doctor who ever told me to get another endoscopy!

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  4. Despite Gypsy's experience, most endoscopies leave NO residual sore throat. Yes, it occasionally does happen. It turns out to be much like a colonoscopy, but takes only about 10 minutes. It would sure be good if they don't find an ulcer. But I'll bet you would like them to find something that they could fix--perhaps with medicines. Hoping it goes well for you.

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  5. How about this for a boat name. Texas Rose.

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  6. How about this for a boat name. Texas Rose.

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    Replies
    1. Well, here we go again, or rather still, 'cause I can't post except as a reply.
      Anyway - I don't care for barco de Billy 'cause it's nod to the Mexicans in my opinion. Sounds like you gonna be bring a boat load of illegals over, which I KNOW you would not want. So, how 'bout Billy Bob's Lone Star? Or Texas Tug? I know it's not a tug (you already got one of those), but everybody knows we do things up better and bigger in Texas, right?

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  7. hi BB. just to let you know . i am NOT a farmer nor a gardener either .and i do not like rain just like you , having said that , the good lord has found it fit to give weslaco tx (5 miles east of my house ) 10 inches of rain . and raymondville tx. (28 mile north of my house) 20 inches of rain . my house received 15 inches of rain on friday and saturday ,all day and night . i hope you will think of me when you get a few drops of rain at your house .nice home made cutwater ,it will look wonderful on that artistic masterpiece boat your building that boat is a one of a kind. your redneck curtains look very nice and economically sound and it will make your house so much more comfortably cozy in winter or even in summer . i am so surprised that dam killer cat do not used them as a scratching post or a wall to climb . and finally just to let you know , texas still misses you !

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  8. hi BB. i think you might consider calling that boat and trailer , ( billy bob's one of a kind ) .

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  9. hi BB. i am so sorry ! i made a mistake ! please forgive me ! weslaco tx is 5 miles from my house ! weslaco tx is west of my house not east !

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