Monday, February 13, 2012

Camera....where my camera???

Well dag blame it, I done forget my camera today and today was a day it was needed. I seen me some purty weird look'n people. Now I ain't criticiz'n no weird people or nuttin like that, 'cause old Billy Bob can be pretty weird too sometimes. But today was an exception. Here come this plump little lady down the sidewalk, bout 200/230 pound, just pump'n away on a little 20 inches bicycle. All is fine up to this point, but every time she push a peddle down, that the way that bicycle go....left, right, left, right....you know what I'm talk'n bout. Zigzaggity down the sidewalk. Then she gives me a great big ol' grin an' let loose the handle bar for a friendly wave....almost lose it in a ditch. Then there was this guy at Walmart. Poor feller look like he done been in a fist fight with a baseball bat....and lost. Most his teeth is gone....poooof, just like that. Well, I ain't mak'n no fun 'cause he got some teeth miss'n, I got a few miss'n myself. But you should have see that "redneck" smile he was giv'n out to everybody what passed his way.....for free. It were priceless.

After a hunnert mile trip, or more, to towns....that's more than one town ya know, I got most everything what was on my list done. Oh by the way....Walmart sucks. Didn't think you'ld ever hear me say that did ya? Ever since they took out half the name brand grocery items....well, you know what I'm talk'n bout. Ain't no choice no more.  Ya see, I had me a bottle of La Choy soy sauce, or what ever the hell it is, on my list. They have La Choy items sit'n all over the place on them shelves, but where the hell is my soy sauce? There ain't none. Either Kinkymon or True Value. Grrrrrrrrr to soy sauce. And for the Jimmy Dean products. Oh they had plenty Jimmy Dean, just not the one little item what was on my list. Then there was the 500 mg aspirin I was look'n for. Yup, it was hid from consumer view...in amungst all them worthless 81 mg baby aspirins. I would have to take 10 them just to get rid of a headache, where I takes one 500mg and headache gone....pooof, just like that.

Don't nobody tell Barney that Old Fat Man that I bought me up a pair of chest waders today. Gonna surprise him when I waddle up to his camp with 'em pull up over my head. Think'n I gonna have to break out that "sew machine" an' do some adjustment on them. Do I see another high blood pressure moment com'n on? Them suckers fit plumb up to my neck. Them ain't no chest waders, they neck waders. Might sew me some pockets on 'em for carry'n some smokes an' stuff. Yeah I know...burn another hole in the "bubba boat".

Ok....got to lay down after all the excitement I had today. I'm tired to a frazzle. Oh damn, forgot to get some water. 


  1. Well well well.. you sure had an exciting day!

    Karen and Steve
    (Our Blog) RVing: Small House... BIG Backyard

  2. Jus draw us some stick figures to represent the weird folks.

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  4. I did not even need a picture to imagine the people you so vividly described.

    You are right never would have thought you would speak ill of your favorite store. Where is Nick (OGT) so he can hear this?
    I think he goes by Complaints? these days.

    Please DON'T break out the sewing machine, remember what happened last time!!

  5. All the chest waders I have ever had, had pockets inside the upper part of them.

  6. some of them crotchless
    Victorias Secret waders.

  7. Around here them is the normal peoples. I tried to get some pictures of the abnormal, but the camera refused to cooperate.