Friday, April 13, 2012

Eat'n cigarette butts

Age does make a difference. Take a bottle of cheap wine, set it on a shelf in the basement for a few years and you got you a bottle of "connoisseurs delight" special aged wine. That's kind of what it's like for us older folks....we age gracefully and our flavor peaks beyond recognition. Think bout that for a while, you may agree.

But then......aging can go the other way.....it sours. Turns into a distasteful bottle of "cheap wine".....as do some of the aging older folks. They become grumpy/grouchy. Lose respect for their fellow mankind. Criticize neighbors and friends. Attack those they consider "dumb/stupid". They ban these people from their lives due to the presumption that "they don't think like me". All wine does not age the same way.

Oh boy, what to do today? First thing happen this morn'n, that damn goat was in the "that jeep" eat'n cigarette butts. Ya see, I left the back hatch open last night. I rekon that goat can smell a cigarette butt a mile away, so's he climbed all the way to the front seat and was chow'n down. Rena, niece in law, run him slap out before I could get a photo. Would'a been a good'un that's for sure.

While I were sit'n outside yesterday, I notice some rocks mov'n. What the hell is mov'n them rocks? So's I watch for a while. It's some kind of bug.....little bug bout a quarter inches long. Ya probably already got it figger out that it's a "doodle bug"....right? Well old Billy Bob ain't never see a doodle bug. All he ever see is the little upside down volcanoes they build.
Now I been see some ugly bugs in my life, but if I run into this sucker in a dark ally, I'm out of there. Any little quarter inches bug what can move rocks 10 times his size deserves some kind of respect.

  So I watched that doodle bug as he cleared an area of big rocks and start dig'n, throw'n rocks an' stuff out his way. 
In 10 minutes he had completed his volcano hole and went to sleep....or what ever they do in that hole. That was my excitement for the day. 

Ok, since I got me some help today, I'm gonna make an adjustment to the liv'n room slide out. Attempt to relieve some weight off that end roller so's it don't go through the floor any more than it already has. If I break something, I'll take a pic of it. Otherwise no photos. Still undecided what to do with the adjustment to the bedroom slide out.
Am I confus'n some of ya that don't know what a "slide out is"? In the RV'n world, a slide out is a room that slides out to make the area more spacious. Mine slides out bout two feets what makes my liv'n room 10 feet wide instead of 8 feets wide. You can dance in here if'n ya want to. Well, after I pick up all my junk lay'n on the floor. "Sheesh Billy Bob, you don't know nuttin bout house clean'n".

Have ya ever notice when ya talk like a redneck people is gonna think you is a redneck? The perception that a redneck don't know nuttin is just a perception....not fact. I'll leave it at that for you to ponder for the rest of the day. Now I got things to do.....fix stuff ya know....redneck style. 


  1. Those doodle bugs fascinated me as a kid. Those little holes are to catch ants. Can't get out before they're grabbed. I haven't seen any under my carport yet, usually gets solid with em.
    Love your wine parody,,,hehehehehe...i'm banned too you know...hahahahaha.

  2. I hope you get the slide fixed just right!

    Right on the spot about how different folks age. Seems to be pretty common for a lot of folks to "go sour!" Should be happy just to make it through another day!

    1. Jim, there's only one way to get the slide fixed right and that is to remove it and replace the bad flooring under it. What I ain't gonna do....yet.

  3. Most of the time if you put cheap wine in the cellar you end up with old cheap wine. Same goes for some people. Now me, well I think that I am well aged good champaigne, but some think I am just old vineger!!

  4. I fount me a old bottle of Thunderbird one time, bout 10 year old I would guess. I takes a big ol' swig an' it taste just like Mogan David.

  5. I sure hope you can get those slides fixed properly. I'm kind of glad I don't have any. Have enough problems on my RV without them too! That goat. Gotta love the goat stories! And I like your wine comparasions.

  6. I agree with Karen and Steve. I, too, have met BB and he is a highly intelligent and interesting person.

  7. I'm wondering why a man with your medical conditions has cigg butts in the Jeep.

  8. I really enjoyed your blog post today in particular the wine parody...a few folks come to mind...:)

  9. Being temporary residents of Wisconsin for another 60 days until our house closes I have to tell you that the wine aging metaphor is true not only of us older folk. Sure seems that like to about ever'one has got themselves grumpy, whiney, and dis-tempered. Heck, that applies to all them political hacks runnin' for President too. If you took all the name callin' and stuff seriously you'd think they all otta land in jail.... wait.... wait.... that might be a good idea on general principles.....

    folks makin' assumptions deserve the dead end streets they end up on!

    cheers, Peter