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Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Me... warsh winders????

Whoa boy howdy, them winders are beautiful. Ain't got no more bugs stuck to 'em, all the dirt, grime an' grease is gone. "You did a good job Billy Bob". Only two to go.

Well, I didn't really do that good a job. Ya see, when ya get tooo busy, ya pay later. My god, my back hurts. How bad does it hurt? Well maybe not enough to cancel a round of golf, but I'm hang'n on bout 6 or 7 this morn'n. I don't know if'n I ever mentioned this before, but I like golf. I could sit here this morn'n an' tell ya bout a hunnert stories bout the game of golf. But....I ain't got time.

Now....bout them winders. Remember when I tell ya bout Frank not finish'n a job? A high pay'n job at that. Well, I breaked out my winder clean'n solution (ammonia an' water) an' a roll of paper towels. In no time flat, I got one (1) sparkl'n clean winder ....on the inside. Now I got to take me a break. Sip up on a cup an' smoke me a little cigar. Wipe'n sweat off'n my brow. Do you have any idea how many winders are in a motorhome? Holy cows, I ain't never gonna get done. But I'm close.

My yard is clean....again. Ya see, when I don't feel like put'n stuff back where I got it from, I throws it out in the yard. And then I pick it up later. 2x4's, chunks of plywood, dishes, pots an' pans, bags of trash....stuff like that. Ha ha, fooled ya didn't I? I don't do stuff like that. Well I do throw plates of food out there to feed that damn goat. My yard is mowed. That's why it's clean again. Nephew Joseph cain't mow when there's stuff lay'n on the ground.

Other than that....that's all I did yesterday. Lay round do'n some think'n, but that's bout it. Keep in mind....."my winders are beautiful".

Ok, what the hell happen. It was freak'n cold last night. Bout 2:30 oclock am, I'm look'n for a dad gum blanket. It's freak'n 60 degs in here. Plus I got me one them backards leg cramps. Ain't had one them in a while....what the hell??? Sit there on the couch for 30 minutes puff'n away on a couple smokes, twist'n an' turn'n till that leg cramp was gone. All the while worried my golf'n game might be messed up this morn'n. That was all I was think'n bout. Yes....I like golf. An' it's a very important activity to me. Gives me exercise ya know.

Sure am glad I'm still in Sinton, Texas. Over there in them southern states, they been have'n some terrible weather. A tornado would level "Sally da house" an' I would be liv'n on the streets....sleep'n under bridges. In 13 years of travels, I been within 2 miles of tornadoes what touched down along the highways. Tore holy hell out of ever thing in their paths. Big 18 wheeler trucks turned over.....stuff like that. Oklahoma, Missouri, Illinois, Alabama an' that terrible storm in Louisiana. Lightning hit a barbwire fence right next to my motorhome....skeer the hell out me. Steam was come'n off'n that fence.

Ok, I got to find my shoes. Take me some aspirin. It's almost tee time. Wish me luck.  



 

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Just more gibber jabber this morn'n

"Where ya gonna go this morn'n Billy Bob"? Shoot, I don't know. Seems everwhere I go, ain't nobody there. Had a pretty good time with them cat puppies though. Lots of suggestions bout what I should do with 'em. I did most of them suggestions....except go to Walmart an' buy a litter box thingy. Hope I didn't piss somebody off 'cause I give 'em back to their mama an' turn 'em back into "wild cats" by do'n so. 

Do I miss them cats? Well hell no.....Yes, a little bit. That little calico would'a make somebody a perfect pet. In fact, she decided I would be that somebody. Foller me all over "da house", lay on the couch with me, cuttle an' hug on me....an' shit on the floor. Scratch that last word an' insert "poop".

Sure would like to hear how many $$$$ Sissy lost on her bet'n game. Speak'n of Sissy, hope ya didn't get too much of that terrible weather what come through there. Dang....when "mama nature" talk's, she talks with a loud voice. "CAN YA HEAR ME NOW"?? Tornadoes an' dead people....stuff like that. That sucks.

The areas receiv'n all this terrible weather, is the same area I will be headed for in the near not too distant future. The weather over there is what has me over a month behind schedule....will it ever clear up over there? Will I ever get out of south Texas? Well I sure do hope it's pretty soon. It's summer in south Texas now ya know. Had us a couple days of the lower 100's.....that's hot folks. But typical for July an' August. You do know don't ya, that any time the temps get in the hunnerts, ya don't go golf ball swak'n, ya don't go fish'n, an' ya don't even go outside. Although I do know a few "hard cores" that will head to the liquor store for some ice cold beer an' a bottle of Boone's Farm.

Now, speak'n of golf ball swak'n, yesterday started out rather hard on the old Billy Bob. The air was "heavy"....with humidity. That caused two problems. The first, I couldn't breath worth a crap an' the second, an' most important, my golf'n ball didn't go where I was aim'n. By the 13th hole, I was wored out to a frazzle.....but, if'n I finish the round, I got a chance to beat the OFM Barney....a slim chance.

Frank warshed "Sally da house" yesterday. Well, he started to wash "da house". He ain't finished. Painted my dad gum tires shiny black. Now how the hell I gonna get that stuff off my tires???

Remember that new project I was tell'n ya bout? The new computer/dining area table. Well, here's what I got in mind.
 
I'm think'n this will be a fun project. Luann door for the top, with oak trim. Oak cabinet. Now where the hell did I leave my table saw?

My "think'n time" each night ain't go'n in the same direction I had intended. Instead of think'n bout what I'm gonna do with the rest of my life, I get into thoughts bout fish'n, golf ball swak'n an' build'n an' fix'n stuff. All of what I like to do. But....what I'm gonna do with the rest of my life is more important. What if my feet get so bad I cain't walk no more? My back cain't be fixed? I have to carry a oxygen bottle everwhere I go? I cain't do none that stuff no more? That is some scary thoughts. An' I get all skeered think'n bout that kind of scary stuff. Health issues suck.

This morn'n, I'm hang'n on to a bout 4 or 5 on back pain. That's wonderful news on this end. Maybe today I'll break out the "to do" list an' scratch a couple items off. Although, I have added a couple in the last week or so. Sometimes I think retirement sucks. If'n I was work'n, I could just hire somebody to check off my list. Oh wait, did I just say retirement sucks? Just forget I ever said that....sheesh!!! Old age ya know.....make ya say stuff ya don't mean.





Monday, April 28, 2014

Peep'n Tom....Christmas 2008

Holly crap, what do ya write about when it's too early to think. I ain't been up very long ya know, so I might be say'n stipit stuff.....like, Santa is a "peep'n Tom".

Ya see, I decided I would make my first trip to the "slabs" in southern California (Ca. I think). It was December of 2008. I met up with internet friends for a glorious 3 to 4 month stay in paradise. Well, it ain't really paradise, but it was warm an' sunny most every day. And it was free camping.

I was lay'n in bed on the eve of Christmas, along with my Lug Nut dog an' Sadie Mae. It was dark outside, with a slight ray of moonlight shin'n down. Dogs start bark'n, I see a movement out my winder. There a tinkle of a little bell. What the hell???....I see two big eyes look'n in my bedroom winder. He was wear'n black pants an' a black hooded sweat shirt thingy so's nobody could see him traips'n round in the darkness.

I grab's holt to a pair of oversize pants an' like a flash, out the front door I go.....with my trusty .357 in hand.
Note: If'n ya don't like guns, you have read too far.
There's nobody there. All is quiet. Ain't nobody is run'n down the road. Then I hear from a near by bush..."Billy Bob, it's me, Seann from Canada....don't shoot".

Ya see, Seann celebrates Christmas in a giving mood every year. Dresses up an' stuff. Hands out gifts to everyone. I remember that Christmas eve 2008 clear as a bell....an' I'm sure Canadian Seann will never forget it either.

Ok, we been to the slabs this morn'n. Now let's all go golf'n. "Dang, it's gonna be on the warm side ain't it Billy Bob"? Well yeah, kind'a. Like 90 degs at noon. Yesterday it got up to 101 here in Sinton an' today is supposed to reach the same....or close.

Oh yeah while I think of it, I got that back AC fan blow'n yesterday. Climb up on the roof??? Nope, took the inside apart an' spin the fan by hand till it was loose enough to run on it's own. Not a "fix", but I was cool last night.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Ha ha....ain't got no cats

All bets are off.

Yes, I did have thoughts of keep'n the little calico cat. But then I got to think'n. Cat poop (clean'n poop litter pan). Scratches an' bites (holes an' bandaides). Can't find the little bastard (It's check out time, where my cat). Calico cats grow up to be mean an' ugly cats.

Ok, why do I say that? I used to have a calico cat....bout 3 or 6 months old. Almost as mean an' feisty as a freak'n orange cat. Had one of them too. The "cute" little thing, the calico, would climb up my arm, nails bared an' leave a trail of scratch marks, blood an' holes in my arms. He would hide...in wait for me to pass by. Then shoot out an' grab holt to my ankle....bite the hell out me (holes an' blood). Then he turned on my first born son Robert. That was it....that cat had to go.

I was sit'n here last night. I look out the winder. Well I want you lookie here, it's mama cat. I says "kitty kitty" an' here she come....asked me where her other baby was at. Well, by now, you know the reeeeesst of the story....Billy Bob ain't got no cats. Damn I'm gonna miss that cat....NOT. Well maybe.

As much as I hate to mention "my back", let me tell ya. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'm sit'n on bout a 4 or 5. That maybe don't mean much to y'all, but it means a whole bunch to me. I've been a solid month of 7's an' 8's.....with a occasional "let's have a baby". This is a relief.

Last night nephew Joseph an' Frank went fish'n. I sure would have liked to go.....but, these two boys "no nuttin" bout fish'n. Deep sea fish'n poles with 60 pound fish'n string. It was dark an' all they had was a little flashlight an' a Bic lighter. You cain't catch no fish like that.....sheesh!!! Anyhows, I waited up for 'em last night to check out their catch. They pull in bout 2:30am with one stink'n fish....a 2 pounds gafftop. That's a salt water cat fish if'n ya didn't know. Good eat'n too.

Boy howdy....I'm tempted. I pull up the weather thingy last night. For Monday, 90 degs at 1pm, partly cloudy with a 9 mile a hour wind out of the north. I'm think'n if'n I was to start a round of golf ball swak'n right bout 9:30, I could handle that. ILT (I like tacos) an' ILG (I like golf). I'll do me some think'n on this.

Ya know don't ya, that it's almost summer time in south Texas. Still a long ways from the high 90's an' lower 100's, but damn, it's get'n hot. Sure do wish I was sit'n at "Yo Mama's RV Resort" over there in Georgia. It's been a while since I camped there. Free food ever once in a while. Mexican food.....homemade tortillas. Yum yum eat 'em up.

Added.....
I missed your yesterdays comment Wayne. Went back an' readed it. Now that's what I'm talk'n bout, you think just like the old Billy Bob. You da man. 

  


Saturday, April 26, 2014

What's for supper......shrimps?

I come in from shrimp'n out in Galveston Bay. I had me 2 baskets of fresh catched iced down shrimps. Each hold'n right bout a hunnert pounds.

Ya ain't never been shrimp'n ???.....well let me tell ya bout shrimp'n. Way before the sun even think'n bout come'n up, you got your shrimp'n clothes on sip'n up a big cup of steam'n brew. You're chew'n on what ever ya can find to tide ya over till noon time. It's gonna be a long day.

The boat needs fuel. Pump'n bout a hunnert gallons (40 to 50) of fuel before the sun comes up is a chore in it self. The decks need washed down. Nets need readied for their daily haul. A hunnert pounds of ice is purchased an' loaded on board. Navigation instruments are checked. "Where the hell is my deckhand"???

I had purchased me a shrimp'n boat back in bout 1968....or therebouts. A 32 foot wooden hull with a little 6 banger Chrysler marine engine. I'm gonna be a millionaire I betcha. Well, first problem was when I turn left, the boat go right. I'm think'n "that cain't be right". A trip under water an' all was well after replac'n the rudder stop thingy. Dang, I could'a had me a wreck. Did I mention I had to rebuild that knock'n Chrysler marine engine? Right there on the back deck was a gazillion motor parts. It run like brand spank'n new. Go a full 20 mile a hour full throttle. Yeee haa, I'm gonna be a millionaire.

I hook on to something....come to a dead stop. The net is hung up. Two hours, I swear it was two hours to get that big ass cable out of my net. An' then, it is got big ol' holes in it. One bout 3 or 4 feets wide. I learned the age old art of shrimp'n net repair. Kind of like knit'n or quilt sew'n. I bought me a brand spank'n new 42 foots shrimp net. I'll not even mention the 6 foot moray eel what got in the net. Just think swing'n a axe. More holes.

Just north of Galveston an' Moses Lake...that where I park my shrimp'n boat, is the capitol of sailboat heaven on Galveston Bay....Clear Lake Shores an' Seabrook. Sailboats don't give ya no way if'n ya didn't already know that. They have right of way over other vessels....motor boats...stuff like that....and my shrimp'n boat. That is unless the shrimp'n boat has his nets in the water, then he has right of way. Ya don't shrimp these waters on Saturday an' Sunday. My god, hunnerts of sail'n boats all over the place. Rich bastards.

Shrimp'n ain't all that hard....while the net is in the water. Just sit back sip'n up a cup, steer'n a straight course an' not a worry in the world. But.....let's bring in the nets, see what we caught. My god, we talk'n bout 4 hunnert pound of stuff...rang'n from beer cans, old tires, fish with teeth, pinch'n damn crabs....an' a few shrimps. All run'n about the back deck. Sort'n, called culling, takes the most of a hour or more. Ya gotta ice down the shrimps, crabs go in a tank of water, eat'n fish is placed in buckets with ice. Another two to four hours of shrimp'n.

Back up to the first paragraph....we got two baskets of shrimp. They got to be sold. Five pounds here ($5) an' a couple pounds there ($2), before ya know it, ya only got a hunnert pounds of shrimp to sell....tonight. Ya call restaurants, drop by beer joints, grocery stores, where ever ya think you can sell them shrimps....at a discount ( 60 to 75 cents a pound). Anything ya got left over, ya freeze for personal use. Like my lunches. Shrimp burgers. Boiled shrimps. Butterflied shrimps. Shrimp stew. I got to where I hated shrimp....eat'n it ever day. Thought I done went to heaven one day when I found a real hamburger in my lunch sack. Bed time usually bout 10 to 11pm at night. Shrimp'n sucks.

Ok, why did I write bout shrimp'n this morn'n? Well ya see, I was sit'n here think'n bout what I would eat for supper today. Shrimp came to mind.

Bout this cat. I was sit'n there last night an' I got to think'n...."I could keep this cat". Well, yeah I could. Go to Walmart an' buy up a bunch of cat stuff....spend a hunnert dollar bill. Then I sit there shak'n my head...."are you nuts Billy Bob"? As much as I like cats an' I worry bout what will happen to this one, I'm think'n....this cat is got to go. Little bastard shit all over my shower, what I got to clean up. Piss all over my pillow thingy on the couch, what I got to warsh. An' this cat ain't but 4 or 5 weeks old. *Think'n ahead* STRESS....cats cause stress. Sorry little girl, but you got to go.

I know ya don't want to hear bout it, but yesterdays golf'n game with OFM Barney was a fun an' excit'n day for me. An' then, bout that Mexican meal we ate. Holy cows, it were wonderful.

Speak'n of yesterdays golf'n day, on bout the 14th hole, something click in my back. Almost go to the ground. I thought I would die last night fro that click, but long bout 6pm, I didn't have hardly any pain at all. Went to bed an' I still ain't got no pains. I was get'n all excitis. Until this morn'n....all bend over again. But I feel pretty good right now. I'm think'n I need to play golf more often. Add add add...subtract subtract subtract....I get bout half a mile walk'n when I play golf. Bend'n over to pick up my ball....or a club I throwed, moving tree limbs, trips to the sidelines to pee.....stuff like that, very good exercise.

Just one more thought for the day.....do ya like rich people? Some the blogs I read, I get the impression I'm read'n a rich mans thoughts to impress his readers. You know what I'm talk'n bout...."got the motorhome back from the shop today....only costed $5000 for repairs". "We prepared T-bone steak an' lobster for dinner last night with a bottle of French wine". "One of our three computers went out .....gonna buy a new one". "I only got $13,000 back on my income taxes".
Ok ok, I know everbody thinks that if you own a RV, you are a rich man. But that ain't true by any sense. I know many RV'ers, drive'n junk, that live strictly off their monthly SS check. Don't eat no T-bone an' lobster. We eat hot dogs purchased from Walmart.   

Friday, April 25, 2014

Down to one....cats that is

Boy howdy was them cats active an' all yesterday. Climb all over the old Billy Bob an' Sadie Mae.

I run out of milk. Hmmmmm, do baby cats drink water? Ha you bet they drink water, an' them suckers like Vienna sausage too.

Ok, I'm down to one cat puppy this morn'n. Mama cat showed up this morn'n, probly for something to eat. When she see the babies, she go haywire...."gimme my cats". I give her the pretty little orange one an' off she go with it in her mouth. Hmmmmm....hope to hell she don't eat it.

So what do ya do when ya ain't got nuttin to do? Well shoot, that's simple...ya go play a round of golf. Maybe I ain't got many that approve of me swak'n golf balls, but that's what I like to do. Golf is kind of like tacos. Some people like 'em an' some don't. ILT!!!! (I like tacos, in case ya didn't know).

Sit'n here look'n out the winders, this is gonna be a perfect day. Well it would be nice to see a little breeze out there to cool me an' Barney down while we are sweat'n our tails off at the golf course.....look'n for our golf'n balls in the woods.

I rekon it's finally summer time in south Texas.....accord'n to the weather thingy. Says we gonna hit 100 degs Sunday an' be sizzl'n hot for bout 4 days. Damn, what I gonna do for those four days? "Sheesh Billy Bob, think. You got air conditioning".

I sure am gonna be happy once I get out of south Texas for a spell. With the hot weather show'n up like it always does, I need a cooler location to "sit on my ass", just like I do here in south Texas. I mentioned what "sit'n on your ass" can do to ya in another post not long ago, so there ain't gonna be no discussion on that this morn'n. You do know.....right? Ya get freak'n lazy....an' then ya cry an' whine from the time ya get up till the time ya go to bed. Excit'n huh?

Have ya ever been somewheres where ya don't feel welcome no more? There are places like that ya know. Git them 'looks'....like...."you still here"? Now in some cases, I see their point. I get all frustrated an' grouchy once in a while.....like maybe oncest or twicest a day. You know what I'm talk'n bout.....it's way past time to go.

Do I worry bout "Sally da house" onest I hit the road? Well yeah I do. Having decided to wait till I get to Georgia to fix that battery control center, I'm gonna stress out bout it all the way.....for 4 or 5 days......in the gruel'n heat of the Interstate highways....sweat run'n down my face. Ok, we not gonna talk bout that this morn'n. I got enough to worry bout over today's golf'n game. "My ball Barney, did ya see where my ball went"???

Ok....that's bout it for the day. Laters. 

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Dad gum mama cat...where you at?

*toughie feelie* Am I alive? My god, bulldozers, backhoes, 18 wheelers.....that's what I feel like. An' grouchy???......you betcha. Poor Frank done figger that out real quick. "Leave me be Frank....come back later when I'm awake". Sheesh....coffee ain't even finish brew'n yet.

I have two cats in my shower. Bet ya didn't know that did ya? Grrrrrr....at that mama cat. I call her all night long an' she never come back for her other two babies. All I know is, these two cats is got to go.

On the bright side, up under the porch to the trailer house, there is a litter of cat puppies. I'm think'n that mama cat will take care of "my" cat puppies

They both ate out of a bowl yesterday. For supper, I had a piece of fish an' some rice-a roonie stuff. They ate some that too. Like to bite my finger off feed'n 'em the fish.
One commenter is hav'n a ball teas'n me bout these cats. "What did I name them"? Although.....I was think'n yesterday....how cool it would be to have a cat. Then I woke up. My god, ain't no way. Bruce an' Myrtle.....

Why I feel so bad this morn'n I ain't got figger out yet. Now you know I have morn'ns that I question, but "this" morn'n, I got something weird go'n on. No explanation at this time.

Ya ain't never gonna guess. There went Frank an' his darling wife out the front gate, in the "billy jeep", to do my laundry. After a week of wait'n, I had done give up on that idea. Dang, I'm gonna have me some fresh folded clean clothes to wear. How much is it gonna cost. Oh my....*scratch'n head*, I just gave Frank a $40 dollar bill. Buy some soap an' get some quarters. Bet ya a dollar I don't get no change. How much is it worth to me? Oh, today, bout a hunnert dollar bill.

Speak'n of hunnert dollar bills an' stuff like that......spend it. It's useless sit'n in a sock up under the bed. Ain't got no value at all....until you go spend it. Then it's worth bout a hunnert dollars.

I can see right now, this blog post ain't go'n nowhere. Same as with many others, there ain't nuttin to talk bout.

Oh wait.....telephone. Son Robert is look'n out for his daddy. Done called a couple back quacks over there in Ga.....I can get a appointment for next week....or something like that. Or, I can get an appointment at the other one in 3 months. I says to Robert...."hold off on call'n doctors". Wait till I get there. Get'n there is the most important right now. Help, I need help...."warsh them there winders Frank". Sheesh!!! I still got to go get propane an' fill the fuel tank. Warsh dishes an' take the trash out. An' bout three days or more put'n stuff back together. Dang, I ain't never gonna get out of here. Then, four or five days to make the trip. *just think'n*....day after I arrive in Ga., me an' Robert gonna get us a tee time at the local golf ball swak'n place.

In the mean time, I'm wonder'n if'n tomorrow would be a good day for some golf ball swak'n right here in south Texas. Eat up a great big ol' plate of Mexican food right after the game. Dang, I'm get'n all excitis. ILT......I like tacos.....an' enchiladas, an' tostadas, an' refried beans, an' spanish rice. Yum boy howdy.....ILT.  


 

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

One down, two to go

Boy howdy, I can hardly walk this morn'n. Buy other than that, I feel pretty dad gum good.

Cats...everbody likes cats. Well, maybe not full growed cats, but little bitty cats. After I read the early comments yesterday, I figgered I might be do'n something wrong....like kill a cat with their feed'ns. So let me tell ya how it went with them dad gum cats. Did some research an' fount out how much to feed 'em....3 to 4 cc's/mg's at a time. Warm it up to 95 to 98 degs. Let the cats do the work, don't force the milk down their throats.

Ok, the first feed'n didn't go too well. These kittens don't know nuttin bout syringes nor do they know what cow milk tastes like. They did well an' went back to sleep. Now, with a little food in their bellies, they became active. Climb out that box an' run'n all over the couch. Climb up on Sadie Mae say'n "hey, this ain't mama". Sadie Mae give them a bath. No pit bull in my dog.

"Hey cat, you smell like poop...ya wanna a bath"?

"Oh god, I'm get'n tired of these blasted cats".

The second feeding, I teach one the kittens to feed hisself out the bowl. He was blow'n bubbles an' walk'n in his food. The other two said "I ain't hav'n none of that". By this time, all three are people tolerant.....they love me.

Most of the day they on the couch....sleep'n an' play'n...eat'n more food. These cats have got to go before I get any attachment to 'em. I like cats ya know. But cats make stress....tons of stress. "Where the hell is that GD/dad gum/freak'n cat"???

At 1am last night, I go out the door an' holler "KITTY KITTY". Here she come. Mama is starv'n slap to death....I give her a hot dog, an' she wants to see her babies. Now ya got to understand, this mama cat is wild. Don't get nowhere around humans, donkeys or that damn goat. She come in "da house" to the cry'n of her babies. She attack me....swing'n her fists at me an' hiss'n. Got me a big ol' hole in one my fingers.....my golf'n finger. Damn cat. I allow her to take one of the kittens, which she hauls ass for the trailer house....underneath. One down, two to go.

But she never come back. This morn'n, I am stuck with two hungry cats.....what got out last night an' I had to go hunt'n for 'em. There they are, just look'n at stuff....like this is gonna be their new home or something. Anyhows, no this ain't gonna be their new home. "Here kitty kitty, come get your babies". Ha.....I was sit'n there feed'n 'em at 3am. Sheesh, this sucks.

Ok, now what ya want to talk bout??? Did I ever tell ya bout the time....we was camped over there in Port Aransas at my usual camp'n site, a big ol' RV park on Cut Off road. It's check out time. Where the hell is "Mouw Mouw", my great big ol' cat?



I chase the damn cat all over that RV park for two hours before he was ready to leave. Call him all kinds of choice words. That's what I'm talk'n bout....stress.

Ok, I got two cats to feed. They scream'n their lungs out. Laters!!!

Ha, they did pretty good all by them selfs....blow'n bubbles an' stuff. Milk all over the couch.
Now I worry bout that other cat. Is he/she still alive? You do know that male cats will kill kittens don't ya? With bout 12 feral cats at "El Rancho Abraham", there is bound to be some males. 


Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Updated....Three little kittens.....in my shower

Point proven....again. Golf sucks.

Oh my God....cats. Ya see, it happen like this.....me an' Frank was sit'n here talk'n yesterday. The motorhome started shak'n....you know, like it does in a high wind storm. But the wind weren't blow'n. Investigat'n time, go find why "da house" don't sit still. Sadie Mae is got her head stuck in a hole....smaller than her head. She was stuck, an' I do mean stuck. But this morn'n she is free.

In the sewer connection compartment is three little cat puppies cry'n "mama, mama, mama...I'm hungry". Now I don't know bout cats in south Texas, but most places I been, mama cats have more than three kittens. I moved them from that compartment to my shower. They don't know how to eat.
"Put 'em in a box outside Billy Bob. Mama cat will find 'em an' move 'em to a new home". That's what I'm gonna do. Box???....where's a box?
Anyhows, I'm glad that three cats are no longer hide'n up under "da house".

IDC....ILT, I'm gonna talk bout golf. When I arrived at the golf ball swak'n place, I wasn't feel'n all too good. I pared the first hole....now I feel better. Three pars an' two birdies, I was feel'n like a hunnert dollar bill. But that didn't last long.....downhill from then on. I lost it on the 9th hole an' never recovered.

And I hurted by the time we finished up a very decent round for old folks on canes an' walkers. God, get'n old really sucks. Then we went to eat a bite. At Whataburger. Never gonna ever go there again. My samich look an' taste like it was cooked yesterday, or the day before, an' just throwed in a microwave for me. The bun was whole wheat. I hate whole wheat. God invented flour for a good reason....hamburger buns. But the chocolate malt was wonderful.

Back at "da house", I take me up two aspirin, an' lay myself down. That's when Frank show up for coffee an' talk a bit. That's also the time we found the kittens. So, no rest for the Billy Bob. This morn'n I feel like I been run over by that bulldozer my neighbor bought a while back....remember? 

My phone ringed. It was my son over in Georgia. He says...."Hey, when ya gonna get here"? I didn't have a good answer 'cause I got some things I got to get done before I can hit the road. Just little things, but they are important. Robert offered to come get me, do those little chores, but I ain't quite ready for that yet. Have ya ever see Robert drive a motorhome? My god, he scare hell out me.

Ya see, the weather in Georgia is much worst than the weather here in south Texas. Rain that is. I don't like rain. I know, I know, rain make grass grow. But then ya gotta spend a full day mow'n the dad burn lawn. Brown lawns are beautiful.

So.....today's agenda is to mess with them cats. I know they hungry, so I may try to feed 'em some milk.....by syringe. But don't turn me in to the FBI for hav'n a syringe....that's drug stuff ya know. I could go to jail an' then the cats would starve to death.....an' it would be all your fault for turn'n me in.

Ok...out of here. See ya tomorrow.

Oh wait, I'm back.......
Fount me a box for these damn cats....they so freak'n cute. But the box is a little too small. Not enough room for the mama cat to stretch out an' feed her babies. *bigger box in mind*
Here is the pic I took yesterday in the shower.....
An' here's a pic I took of 'em in the box......

I broke out that syringe an' I fed them cats. Not very much 'cause I don't know how much to give 'em. Yes a cow made the milk. I've raised many new born kittens on cow milk....they was all fine. Each kitten received 6 cc's......corrected to 6ml. One even chewed on the syringe....like a mama nipple.

Then along come Sadie Mae. First thing she do is reach in the box an' pick up a cat. Not one time, but bout 6 times. Not know'n what she would do with the kittens, I give her a talk'n to....."put that damn cat down...NOW". For the past hour, Sadie Mae is sit'n in front that box. What she think'n I don't know. Could it be "mama" instinct in her or is it the pit bull in her?  "Sadie Mae, get out that box". Crazy dog.

Now I got to Google how much to feed cats at a early age. Guess'n 4 to 5 weeks. 


Monday, April 21, 2014

HUH???? I don't remember

Sometimes how you feel will determine what ya think. This morn'n is a non-think'n day.

I enjoyed writ'n bout my relatives yesterday, but when I went back in my blog, I got all hung up on read'n stuff I wrote long ago. Now that was some kind of fun. Then I plumb forgot what I was writ'n bout. Today I don't have time to continue the story.

Had a surprise visit yesterday. The OFM Barney dropped by to see if'n I was still kick'n. Barely I was. I enjoy sit'n down with Barney talk'n bout "stuff". Stuff being "damn I hurt", "what I gonna do", "where I gonna go".....stuff like that. We both enjoyed our talk yesterday an' I look forward to many more. Oh by the way.....me an' Barney gonna meet up at the golf ball swak'n place this morn'n. Swak a few ya know.

Ain't no use try'n to write no more this morn'n. Dad gum brain is in "don't remember shit" mode. In fact, me an' Frank was sit'n here talk'n bout something....."what was ya talk'n bout Billy Bob"? There was one (1) word I was try'n to say. Just one freak'n word. What the hell was the word? Ya ever do that?

Ok, I got golf'n clubs to clean an' polish. "6 iron Billy Bob, don't forget yer 6 iron".

 

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Ranch'n an' farm'n.....gone, poooof, just like that

Well shoot, I been sit'n here for hours an' I still don't know what direction we gonna go in this morn'n.

If'n my kids an' grandkids read my blog, there are stories in it all bout their daddy an' papaw all the ways back to bout 2008 when I started this blog thingy. At that time, my mind was clear an' I 'membered stuff from when I was bout 5 or 6 year old. But in 2014, those memories an' that clearness of mind is bout gone.

Last night, after I turn the TV off an' sit there on the couch think'n, I recalled the times me an' my grandpa Victor would sit around an' he tell me stories. But I was only 10 years old, so he told me no "juicy" stories. You know, wimmins an' stuff like that. He did tell me many stories bout Pancho Villa though. About when my aunt Ruby Evenln, aged bout 4 or 5 year old, fell in a dug well an' great grandpa saved her. Well, maybe not that many stories, 'cause he often repeated himself. My favorite was bout the time Pancho Villa an' his crew rescued grandpa out of the corn field. *I've tole this story a few times already*

Ya see, my relations, on both sides, grandpa Piepmeier, his daddy John Piepmeier, his sister Ada Piepmeier had homesteaded property south of the Florida (pronounced Flo-ree-da (or ta depend'n where ya was rasied)) mountains, just south of Deming, NM. Next door was one of the many Birchfield ranches that raised cattle an' did a little prospecting in the mountains. Grandpa married one of the Birchfield girls.

This was my grandma, Clara Ann Birchfield, I never got to meet. She died early 1918 ( Born March 21, 1891 and died April 9, 1918) shortly after giv'n birth to my Uncle Luke at the young age of 27.

Ha....I went back in my old blogs to find the story of Pancho Villa rescue'n my grandpa from the corn field. Two hours later....I am back. Man that was fun....(in the blogger search thingy, type in "corn field"). Good read'n.

Now where the hell was I go'n with this blog post? Sheesh!!!!

Ok, bout the weather....88 degs accord'n to my Walmart temp thingy. The AC is go'n full bore, the wind is blow'n, an' there ain't no sunshine. Sadie Mae is up under "da house". Damn cats.

Sept in this morn'n. Watched boxing until bout 1:30 or so. Bammm, knock 'em out John. Well actually, the guys name was Juan....that's John right? Anyhows, I hurted like hell this morn'n. I ain't do'n nuttin.

Ok, happy Easter to all of ya. Save me a couple them boiled an' colored eggs. 

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Plastic Easter eggs......Huh?

Ok, I suppose today is Saturday or something like that.....I don't keep track. Well, I try to keep track, but somewheres dur'n the week, a day comes up miss'n. One of the many downfalls of be'n retired.

I don't know bout nobody else, but I don't like plastic Easter eggs. On all the TV commercials, all ya see is plastic eggs....produced by oil an' chemicals. Is this some kind of a conspiracy or something? To take out the egg farmers of America? Just a thought for ya to ponder on today...the day before Easter. Now don't be leav'n no comment bout plastic is healthier than colored chicken eggs.

Speak'n of Easter......many many years ago, Easter was a time ya looked forward to. Ya spended hour after hour in the kitchen boil'n an' color dye'n them eggs all different colors an' designs. Think'n of strange places to hide them for tomorrow morn'n before ya let the kids loose. Hand decorated baskets for each of the kiddo's. Well, the old Billy Bob did his egg preparation a little different. Not all were boiled. It was tradition back then that the kids were to crack their eggs in their heads before peel'n an' eat'n them. Ya git the picture, right? Yuk, what a mess. But it brought the biggest smiles an' laughter ya ever see.

Holy crap, I got me a little energy yesterday afternoon. But it didn't last very long. I even shaved.  Laundry still not done. Thanks a lot Frank.

What the hell is that smell??? I open the refrigerator door yesterday to get me a hot dog.....whoooo-yeeee, that stinks. Today, I will attempt to clean the refrigerator....an' I'm sure the trash will have to be took out. See what I'm talk'n bout? Always something  to do.

Did me a nail trim on my hands an' feet last night. Maybe that will help my golf game. Then I soaked my feet in warm/hot water, dried 'em off an' applied a gob of pain reliever stuff from Walmart. Did it help? IDK, IDC, ILT....translated to I don't know, I don't care, I like tacos. Dang I like tacos. Especially Taco Bell tacos. With lettuce, maters, a little cheese an' a couple packs of that Taco Bell hot sauce. There ain't no Taco Bell in Sinton, Texas...dad gum it.

Ok, now for some my inner thoughts. They ain't too good at this time. I got to get some stuff fixed, but you already know that. I read a blog, not every day, but I do read it....of a lady that is dying a slow death. She don't hold nuttin back....tells it like it is. That got me to think'n bout the stuff I write on my blog, I tell it like it is, bout my aches an' pains. Well, I don't tell ya bout everthing what ails me, but I do talk bout this dad gum back that is kill'n me an' hav'n to wear sandals instead of shoes. Ya might say to me "a bad back cain't kill ya", but let me set ya straight....Oh yes it can. It takes time an' yes it can. Ya see, when ya got a bad back that makes ya sit most the day, other things go haywire with your systems. Blood circulation to the legs is hindered by the swell'n of yer big ol' butt cheeks. Internal problems occur.....pee'n an' poop'n problems. Food digestion slows down. Ya eat less 'cause it hurts to stand in front of the stove cook'n a healthy meal. And ya get lazy as hell.....no energy. Sit'n sucks.

An' then this other fear hit me last night. I need to be around people....just in case ya know. What if'n I fall an' need help get'n up? What if'n I need to go to the hospital? Not that I'm at that point yet, but I can see it in the near future if'n things don't change. An' that skeers me. "Hook up the "billy jeep" an' take a trip Billy Bob". That sounds easy, but even that skeers me.....what if?

My trip to Georgia is a 1,000 mile trip. That takes me 4 to 5 days (200 to 250 miles a day). An' that's mostly interstate I-20 from Shreveport, La. to Douglasville, Ga. Anybody wanna ride along? I'll teach ya how to drive a big ol' motorhome. Oh wait....let's just forget that for a minute.

Again, I am sorry I ain't got nuttin excit'n to write about like I used to, but hang in there, the old Billy Bob we used to know, may be back.

Friday, April 18, 2014

What is a el nĂºmero tres

What is a el nĂºmero tres (#3)? Well, it could be anything depend'n on which Mexican restaurant ya eat at. At the one me an' OFM Barney eat at, after a grueling round of golf, a el nĂºmero tres (#3) consists of a fat cheese enchilada with the best enchilada sauce ya ever eat. A great big ol' crispy shell taco filled with bout a pound of ground beef seasoned just right, a hand full of lettuce, chunks of maters an' topped off with more cheese. Of course I put a good dose of red salsa on it. On the other side the platter sits a delicious look'n tostada with refried beans, lettuce an' maters an' some more that cheese. I red salsa that sucker up too. A big ol' pile of refried beans an' another pile of spanish rice, ya got yourself a wonderful meal.

Dang, that made me hungry.....

My one day (1) of "back don't feel too bad" is a great memory. It didn't last. Although, I am better off than I was a week or so ago when I was all bend over every morn'n try'n not to pee on the floor an' brew'n me up my first pot of coffee. If'n ya ain't got a bad back, ya don't know what I'm talk'n bout. It sucks the life right out of ya. Mentally an' physically. I suppose if'n you was on a walker or in a wheelchair, that would do it too. An, that thought skeers the hell out me. Think'n get'n in a walker fight with MsB from Del Rio.

Now if'n these 500mg aspirins will do their job.....Ha, flat chance of that, I'll get some more stuff done today. Just sit'n here look'n at it, it don't look so bad....a few items what need stowed, sweep goat poop out the door.....actually grass an' dirt from Sadie Mae in an' out all day long. Clean the stove, take the trash out. Basket all the dirty clothes up what lay'n on the floor. Ya see, I cain't do very much at a time. I got to go sit down....take me a break. Not much gets done, but it's a plus.

An' then I sit over there on the couch think'n.....I'm gonna be a new man. When I get this back fixed.


I used to do stuff ya know......

Bout 2003....or 04. Me an' my old school buddy Gerry in Ridgecrest, Ca.

US Hwy 90, somewhere's in Texas on a trip to Ga....New Orleans included. I park "Alice" right downtown the French Quarter. No ticket.

This was when I was tam'n the west back in the 1800's....or something like that.

Dang, I knows how to catch me up some pretty good fish

A day in the life of a sailing boat captain......bout 1996

Who says I cain't row a boat????

After a year of construction, this was the result....under power go'n a hunnert mile a hour


 Yup, I was a dirt digg'n fool......thars gold in them there hills....




Have ya ever ride in  Billy Bob golf'n cart???

An' then....I got old.....


                                        
                                         

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Another ugly day.....in paradise...Ha!

Another week coming to an end.....what's with that? This should be spring, not dad gum cold fronts hit'n south Texas. And cold fronts make ya sit inside. Ya don't go outside to do nuttin. The days pass ya by, an' "walla", another week gone....poooof, just like that. An' that's what happened at Billy Bob's house.

Yesterday was a success. Not a total success, but one I'll remember for bout 4 or 5 days. The wind picked up an' costed me a few strokes, an' that dad gum putter????....dang, I need a new putter. I feeled good all the way up to bout the 14th hole an' then my back start it's hurt'n shit. Not that it affects my game or nuttin like that, I just get all uncomfortable.....cain't stand up straight, hurts to sit down in the golf cart....stuff like that.

No sense this morn'n mention'n anything bout our, me an' Barney's, great dinner (afternoon meal). It was excellent as usual. I had my usual.....el nĂºmero tres (#3). You are allowed to correct me on my spelling if'n ya want to.

Today is nothing like yesterday. Today it's all cloudy, a bit chilly with a very slight breeze of bout 10 or 15 mile a hour....an' it's try'n to rain. Another perfect day for "do'n nuttin" outside. Do'n nuttin outside means work involved stuff. Like chang'n the thermostat in the "billy jeep". I ain't do'n that. Now that I think bout that thermostat, it can wait till I get to Georgia to do that. It ain't like I'm gonna be driv'n the "billy jeep" to Georgia. I'm gonna be towing it to Georgia....with the engine turn slap off.

When ya buy a used car, there's a reason behind why to previous owner sold it. Well, a couple of them reasons have showed up in the "billy jeep". You already know bout the rear axle seal what leaked an' the parking brake shoes what was replaced. Ajustments an' stuff. Well, there's a noise. I mentioned it before, but it's still do'n it. Not talk'n bout that continuous whin'n noise, but in a slow turn, there's a noise like a tire is rub'n on something. Only does it when ya turn....an' slowly. Haven't been able to find it yet, but still look'n. Why the hell didn't I buy the 2007 Jeep instead of this old one? It sure were purr-dy.

 Ain't been much talk to the kids bout my arrival in Georgia. Got me a good place to stay, but I still ain't called "yo mama" on the phone yet. My nurse daughter, the one what is supposed to make my doctor appointments, feed me breakfast in bed, warsh my clothes an' all that good stuff, I ain't hear a word from her. I just ain't all excitis bout hav'n to do all that stuff by myself. But I am all excitis bout play'n golf with my son Robert.....an' go'n camp'n, stuff like that. He's a good boy. An' the dad gum gas prices keep go'n up.....$3.45, or something like that. Dang, gonna cost me right at $500 for this trip. Plus what I spend at Walmart RV resorts along the way. 

Ok, I'm done for the day. Got a few inside things I need to do....housework, yuk, I hate housework.


  

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

A new day has arrived....a good 'un

Holy smokes......I don't believe it.

Because I was totally bored with TV programming last night, I went to bed early. And I went slap to sleep. Weren't none that toss'n an' turn'n I get every other night, I was sound asleep, off in another world. I thought that was rather cool.

Well it was cool up until I got cold somewheres bout 4 am or somewheres round there. "Where the hell is my blankie"? But what was really cool, when I got up this morn'n, my back feel like a hunnert dollar bill (.20 to .30 cent worth). But it was cold in "da house". Turned me on some heat. My god, my Walmart special temp thingy says it got down to 34. There ain't no way that can be right. I'm think'n I need a new Walmart special temp thingy.

Ok, enough bout the weather. "What ya gonna do today Billy Bob"? Well I suppose I'll run up to the golf ball swak'n place an' hit me a few golf'n balls. That's always excit'n. Gonna use a brand new swing technique today as I attempt to get my ball on the green in 3 or 4 strokes. Then I can putt that sucker bout 3 or 4 times into that little hole. That's the way ya play golf.

Made that trip to Walmart yesterday. All I did was pick up my meds an' then go back home. Frank says...."I smell antifreeze". I says...."I smell it too". Dang I hate crawl'n up under the "billy jeep". Thermostat needs changed ASAP. But I ain't gonna do it today.

Look'n at my "to do" list. Dang, I got lots of stuff to do. Some the stuff I did a week ago needs done again. That is not progress.

Ok, I'm out of here. Wish me a successful day at the golf course. Maybe I'll beat the OFM Barney today. Fat chance of that happening. These young kids just hit a golf ball toooo far.




Tuesday, April 15, 2014

I like....do'n nuttin

Ok, I know it's late to be start'n a blog post, but what the hell, it's got to be done.
"Now what ya gonna write bout Billy Bob"?

After yesterdays be'n bended over most the day, I was expect'n to be in bad shape again this morn'n. I got up an' I was straight as a stik....a 2x4. An' speak'n of yesterday, that dad gum cold front was just that, a cold front. Now accord'n to my Walmart special themp thingy, it got down to 37 degs last night. I just looked at it an' that what it says. That folks is cold for tropical south Texas.

Today was supposed to be cloudy an' rain by the bucket full. Well it ain't. Sun is shin'n in my winders, there ain't no wind an' there ain't a cloud in sight. Stupit weatherman don't "no nuttin". Hmmmmm, wonder what tomorrow will be like....golf ball swak'n anybody?

Speak'n of golf ball swak'n.....I like golf. It's just like any other sport ya might have a like'n for....ya get all excitis just think'n bout it. Not everbody likes golf though. An' they don't like to read bout it. But I do, an' this is "my" blog, so I write bout it.  In fact, I remember one time me an' old "pesky neighbor" Wayne showed up at the golf course with snow on the ground. It was cold too. We both scored in the low 90's an' only lost bout 3 balls a piece (little white balls an' white snow). Went golf'n with two my sons over in Georgia during a rain an' lightning storm. Well, it didn't happen until bout the 8th hole. Spent bout a hour at the club house wait'n for the rains to pass. Then we went back out an' finished the round. Another time me an' my son Jesse went golf'n up on some mountain (Tally Mountain). It was 40 degs or less when we got there. Ice everwheres. Yet we played 18 holes. Yes I like golf'n. An' I'll play as long as my body will let me. I might even go fish'n in the "bubba boat" if'n I want.

My hopes are that in the very near future I will be writ'n bout "go'n down the road a piece"...see'n trees an' stuff. Alligators bask'n in the sun. Racoons steal'n stuff off my picnic table. Cook'n hot dogs, an' catch'n T-bone steaks on fire on my Weber grill. Boy howdy do I ever miss that. In the mean time, just hang on to yer hat an' listen what I have to say bout "do'n nuttin". Do'n nuttin ain't really all that bad. It's much better than dig'n a freak'n ditch or something like that. That's work, an' I don't like work.

Oh yeah, before I forget....I got me a new project. I'm gonna remove the kitchen table what I use for my comput'n stuff an' replace it with a long homemade table that reaches all the way from the refrigerator to the entrance door (bout 6 foots x 2 foots). Build me a homemade cabinet to replace the Walmart special POJ (piece of junk) one I use now. I like work'n with wood.   

Boy howdy, that boy of mine sure do make my day. I don't like to choose a #1 son, but I got me one that fits that category to a tee, my oldest. I love my Robert. Now go find my dad gum golf ball over there in the woods.

It's Walmart time. What meds I thought I was low on is gone....poooof, just like that. I ain't got none. Ha....I just called Walmart an' they be ready in 2 hours. But then, I remember the last time I called in...they weren't ready. Hope they don't make me "cuss an' swear" again when I go there to pick 'em up.

Hired nephew Frank to do my laundry. He needs the money an' I need to mark it off my list. Last time he done 'em for me, he did a perfect job. Much better than I do. He folded them.

I really ain't got nuttin to talk bout today, other than I feel pretty darn good.....consider'n. See ya tomorrow.

Monday, April 14, 2014

I was excitis I betcha a dollar

Am I gonna write bout food again this morn'n? Probly not......but, I do like eat'n food.

Now.....let me tell ya bout get'n all excitis.
"Be careful Billy Bob what ya say".
Yesterday morn'n me an' OFM Barney had us a tee time at the local golf course. We were both there on time with smil'n faces. After I hit a few golf'n balls, I began to feel pretty good. No pains an' I was excitis as hell......it's a good day. By the time we reached hole #9, my score sucked.....hit'n balls like a girl. But I was still excitis. That don't happen very often. The back 9 was a bit better than the front, I was hit'n 'em straight an' true. Ended the round with a decent 93, even with a hunnert mile a hour wind blow'n an' a terrible score on the front 9. 

A quick decision was made for where we would eat our normal "after game" meal. In Sinton, Texas, there ain't many choices. We chose Dairy Queen. It was so so. Then we sit there an' talk for bout a hour. "No...I don't know when I'm gonna leave". "No....I don't know what I want to do". "Yes....I still think bout my dream". Stuff like that....we had a great conversation.

This morn'n I got up barely able to make it to the bathroom. I'm all bend over again this morn'n, an' "damn, I got to pee". Other than that, it's just another day.

Oh wait.....remember yesterday I said it was gonna be cold here (in the 40's early morn'n)? Ha....screw the weatherman. Before bed time it was so hot in "da house" (78 degs 85% humidity) I attempted to turn the bedroom AC on. Nope, the damn thing just sit there hummmm'n up a tune. The fan motor don't start. Wasn't it bout a year or so ago I said I was gonna fix that? Well, maybe it's now time.

That sucker is almost brand new, why is the fan motor not starting? When I say brand new I ain't talk'n like I bought it last week or nuttin like that. It's 9 years old go'n on 10, but I ain't got but bout two months run time on it. That motor should start right up. "Didn't you used to be a AC expert a few years back Billy Bob"?

Ok, lets see what happen when ya head to the RV repair place for a reasonable cost. The guy turns the AC on. The fan don't run. "Ya need a new motor". Then he looks in a book. "The AC is obsolete, ya need a new AC". They do the same thing when ya got a battery what needs a charge. "Ya need a new battery".
I know what that fan motor needs, an' it ain't replaced. Climb up there on the roof, take the cover off an' "oil" the motor bearings.But not today.

Oh damn, I'm bout out of meds again. That means a trip to Walmart, where I always spend a hunnert dollar or more for stuff I don't need...or even want. I've found that the older I get, the less I want. That should be a good sign. But I still pull a hunnert dollar bill out my wallet every time I go through the check out. New golf'n balls? Well yeah, ya cain't play golf with dirty balls. Figger that one out.

The news? Damn I get all piss off when I read the news. Throw'n rocks, bicker'n an' bite'n, call'n each other names......nuttin good gets done. Grrrrrrrrr. I'm think'n there needs to be some changes made 'cause this ain't work'n. Don't think this is a political thing. It's a American thing. No comments please.

Ok, I got a few things I need to do today. "Sally da house" needs some attention. Oh crap, I can take warsh'n "da house" off the list.....rain start'n up. Oh man....high winds pick'n up. An' they kind of cool.....cold front? Yup, that what it are. "Now what ya gonna do Billy Bob"?


Sunday, April 13, 2014

Mashed taters for breakfast????

This morn'n I'm just gonna say "have a good day an' pass the mashed taters".

Speak'n of mashed taters, many many years ago, we fried mashed taters for breakfast. Bout 4 or 6 pieces of crisp bacon, 3 or 4 eggs over easy, fresh baked biscuits.....now that's what I'm talk'n bout. Ya don't get that kind of food no more. In fact, the last mashed taters I ate, somebody was too lazy to peel 'em first. I don't do tater peels. Tater peels go in the slop bucket for the pigs. Ok Ok, somebody said tater peels was healthy, so now everbody leave the peels on an' dont give a care what they taste like.

Boy howdy, the mention of fresh baked biscuits sure do make me hungry. I used to make homemade biscuits. Many many years ago. Now I just grab a can out of the frige, pop it open an' walla, I got fresh baked biscuits.

Now we come down to the best piece of meat you can eat. Bacon!!! Everbody loves bacon. Cooked either soft or crisp, it'll make ya "oink" on every bite. Then come along, that same guy that said tater peels are good for ya. He says bacon will kill ya. Now let me see.....I ain't dead yet an' I eat bacon.

This morn'n is the beginning of yet another cold front. It's all cloudy with 89% humidity....had a little sprinkle of rain. Ain't no winds yet but the weather thingy says 17 mile a hour by noon. I can hit golf balls in them kind of winds. Tomorrow it's gonna be only 47 degs an' Tuesday it's gonna be cold all day long....67 degs. That's Brrrrrrrr weather.

Ok....I'm out of here. Ya never ever want to be late for a tee time. It just don't look good. 

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Dad gum high winds....go away

Ok,......"why the hell did I sleep so long last night". I agree that it was rather late when I went to bed (1:30am), but to sleep till 11AM?????.....there ain't no way. That just ain't right.

Now I ain't talk'n no regular toss an' turn sleep, I'm talk'n dead to this world sleep. Once I finally dozed off, that was the last thing I remember. Sadie Mae wake me up jump'n up an' down say'n "I gotta pee".

Now that reminds me of when I was a teen. I didn't have me no regular place to sleep, so's I would sneek over to my aunts house bout 2 or 3 times a week an' climb in on the couch. We didn't lock doors way back then. Then I would sleep for bout 10 hours before I started my new excit'n adventurous day....at bout noon time. Got to let the "rest of the story" go.....too many bad thoughts come to mind.

The weather has been pretty good down here in south Texas. That is if'n ya don't mind a few high winds blow'n all day long. Day time temps have been bounc'n round in the low 70's to high 80's....which is great temps for swak'n golf balls an' stuff like that. Yesterday I did just that. Went out in the yard an' did me some practice with a sand wedge.....minus the sand. Wonder if'n I can hit 'em that good at the golf course....???? "Barney, where you at....watch this"?

Boy howdy, did I have some stuff in the old POS "that jeep". Throwed most of it in the dumpster  (three Walmart bags), but I want ya lookie here.....I been look'n for that little 7.2 volt battery for over two years (battery for the remote control on the Mississippi river boat). Now if'n ya know anything bout boats, ya know they got to have ballast in the bottom so's it don't turn over. We talk'n real boats here, not the little $30,000 bass fish'n boats. A few hunnert years ago they used rocks for ballast. Then somebody figger out that lead was heavier than rocks. That's what the recently found battery is for....ballast to keep the Mississippi river boat on a even keel. Hmmmmmm, I need to do some work on that boat. Speak'n of ballast, my Formosa sail'n boat had 9,000 pounds hang'n off the bottom.

Ok....I climbed up under the "billy jeep" again yesterday. Just to verify where I thought that water leak was at. Yup, there it is, right where I thought. Auto parts store is on the agenda for a new thermostat an' a new gasket. "Will somebody please help me up off'n the ground"???

I'm done. Cain't think of nuttin else to write about. Laters....


Friday, April 11, 2014

My battery is dead

"Ha ha Billy Bob, ya really screwed up yesterday by mentioning golf". I'm begin'n to think that just the mention of golf turns into a game of "don't read Billy Bob's blog today".

Had a long talk with my son Robert this morn'n. Boy howdy did he let me know a thing or two. Ya see, I was worried that I would be out of place camp'n at "Yo Mama's RV Resort". Be a "old fart" burden on all the younger folks...stuff like that. But I'll call "Yo Mama" today an' verify it's Ok to camp in her yard or if'n I'm just suck'n buttermilk through a straw.

As much as I hate the IRS, today I will attempt to "git 'er done". Cain't think of nuttin more to say bout that. Now.....what the hell is my user name an' password for TaxAct? Ha....found it.

This morn'n I am in a "no start" situation. I turn the key to start an' there ain't nuttin there. My battery is dead (cain't think), I got a flat tire (back pain) an' I have a sour disposition (grumpy as hell). So I'll say no more at this time in hopes that I'll feel better after while. Then I might tell ya a story.

Well shoot, I should have knowed it, my blog did not update again this morn'n.

This is the second try....on IE. 




Thursday, April 10, 2014

Splish splash....golf balls in da water

I was sit'n here an' got to think'n....."damn it Billy Bob, ya hit two balls in da water". For the rules of "quick play", I marked down a 6 for a par 3....an' moved on to the next hole. Then I took my trusty 3 wood an' I'm gonna hit that ball 200 yards right down the fairway. A 75 yard walk an' I hit that ball again. Over there in the high grass rough. "No Billy Bob, that was a simple 3 foot putt...an' you missed it". Ya see what I'm get'n at here don't ya... I suck at golf ball swak'n.

But, not only did I have a wonderful time out there, I only cuss bout 14 or so times. That's not a record low number, but it's get'n closer to "no cuss'n". You would love play'n golf with the old Billy Bob. If for nuttin else, it would be for the laughs.

After that disgusting round of golf, me an' the OFM Barney heads to our usual Mexican food eat'um up place. I was hungry an' in need of a alka seltzer. Ok, we get us a waiter what don't speak the first word of English. I'm tell'n him I need a small empty glass so's I can take my alka seltzer....an' I order a "numero tres" for my choice of dinner at the same time. That confused him......Grrrrrrrr. He brings green instead of red salsa. The dinner was awesome...as usual.

Back at "da house", I had to take a couple aspirin an' lay down for a bit. Checked my feet....no swell'n. That was good news. Although they were sore. Maybe my new sandals don't fit right. Or maybe I'm at that point where I will be barefooted for the rest my life. Feet don't hurt barefooted.

Now that reminds me the time....I was just a 6 year old....rambunctious little heathern kid. I didn't wear no shoes. Run a hunnert mile a hour through the briar bushes an' sticker burrs. Them briar bushes was my hide out ya know. The older boys was always chas'n me to throw me in the creek or in with the pigs....beat me up, stuff like that. As long as I was within hear'n distance, all I had to do was holler "MOMS" an' she came to my rescue. But this day, I was alone with that old ugly dog out in the corn field. I was play'n Indian, throw'n corn stalk spears.....here come them big boys sneek'n up on me. Off to the briar bushes I go....a hunnert mile a hour ya know. There's snakes an' spiders in there, accord'n to the big boys, but I weren't skeered no snakes an' spiders. Well, if'n a spider get on me today, that skeer the hell out me. I spend the rest of the afternoon in them briar bushes.....holler'n "MOMS" at the top my lungs. Dang I miss them old days.

Nothing to say bout the Georgia trip today. My mind is eat up with "when ya gonna do your taxes Billy Bob"? I've got mine simplified down to one them E-file sites on the internet. All I have to do is input a few numbers, push a button, an' it's done.....till next year. Ok....where the hell is the numbers??? Grrrrrrr.....IRS sucks.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

BAAAAA-BAAAAAMMMM.....a hunnert mile

Sit'n here wait'n....wait'n....wait'n. Come on 10:30am.


BAAAAA-BAAAAMMMMM!!!! I hit that sucker a hunnert mile.

Now that's what I'm talk'n bout.

After yesterdays non-productive an' mucho grouchy day, I don't know what to expect for today. But....I am gonna go play a round of golf. Every attempt will be made to have a smil'n face, refrain from cuss'n them bad shots and thoroughly enjoying this day.
"What ya gonna say when ya hit a ball in the water Billy Bob"??? I don't hit balls in da water.....I ain't no amacheer ya know. Oh wait........








Tuesday, April 8, 2014

"bubba boat" is loaded

Holy cows, let's talk bout cats this morn'n......not!!!!

As suggested bout a hunnert times..."call animal rescue", that ain't gonna happen. The reason it ain't gonna happen, I already stated that bout a hunnert times. The cats are fine. They just got to find a new place to live before I hit the road.

Ok, speak'n of hit'n the road....the "bubba boat" is in the back of the "billy jeep". Along with two "bubba boat" batteries, a Billy Bob fabricated troll'n motor mount, the troll'n motor.....Oh hell you know what I'm talk'n bout.....everything is in there. Also fabricated a new fish pole holder for my two "bass" fish'n poles. That was easy....a hammer an' some scrap bail'n wire. If I get the opportunity dur'n my tedious day today, I'll go take a photo for ya. You would be proud of my handywork.


See what I'm talk'n bout???

So now that that's out of the way, what am I gonna do today? I ain't feel'n too bad this morn'n so maybe I can get something important done. Warsh winders??? Oh hell no....I don't do winders. "Sally da house" is in dire need of a bath, but I probly ain't gonna do that neither. Do you know how long it takes to warsh a freak'n motorhome??? Sheesh, I would be out there all day long. Before ya tell me it don't take very long to warsh a motorhome, ya got to remember, Billy Bob has got to take his 10 minute breaks bout every 15 minutes. That's written in the Rules and Regulations for retired people ya know. An' I am one that abides by all rules an' regulations.

I was sit'n over there on the couch last night, think'n ya know, an' I got to think'n bout my golf clubs. How far do I hit each one?....on a good hit of course. Holy crap, that ain't very far. In my bag are three clubs that all hit the same distance.Then for a distance of 135 yards, I don't even have a club for that distance. Golf sucks. But tomorrow morn'n (Wednesday) right at 10:30, I'll be stand'n on the #1 tee box swing'n a club at that damn little golf ball. Come rain or shine....wind or no wind.Yeee haw....I love golf ball swak'n.

Ok, my Georgia trip is still on my mind. Excitis??? Nope I ain't. Ya see, I'll be go'n to a place where I don't fit in with the younger generation.....my kids an' grankids. They don't have time for old folks that sit round all day Grrrrrr'n stuff an' whin'n bout aches an' pains. They got jobs to go to, my grankids to take care of....school, stuff like that. I 'member back a time when my grandpa lived next door. He Grrrrrr'ed an' complained. I didn't have time to spend with him. Now, at my age, I know how he felt.....an' it's sad. I would be better off to find me some old folks my age to hang out with an' sit there Grrrrrr'n at each other all day long. Tell a few lies, stuff like that. Old folks understand each other ya know. But anyhows........  




Monday, April 7, 2014

Cat puppy worries

Ok, we need to talk bout these blasted cats. Not just the ones somewheres up in the under compartment areas of "Sally da house", but ALL the cats that live at El Rancho Abraham. They are here for a meaningful purpose.

Yesterday I mentioned there was bout 15 cats. Well, I sit here look'n out the winder an' it's more like 8 or 10....plus the one mama cat an' her puppies up under "da house". So that clears that up.

Now the purpose of so many cats in one place is to keep down the rat an' mouse population. An' it works. You will find no snakes within the immediate area. A few raccoons on occasion, but the dogs skeer them off. 

As far as get'n a rescue group to attempt to "rescue" the mama an' her puppies, that's out of the question. In order for them to get to the cats, they would have to disassemble my house. Fuel tank, grey an' black water tanks would have to be removed to get to the only opening we can find that "mama" entered.....accord'n to Frank an' Joseph. Setting a cat trap under "da house" would only catch "mama", or one of the other 8 or 10 cats, an' leave her kittens to die.....somewheres up under "da house". In time, the cats will leave their present "low rent" housing in search "for greener grass on the other side the fence".

I did two things yesterday. Sadie Mae spent the entire day inside instead of outside sniff'n out them cats. I spent the day lay'n on the couch with my feet elevated. Well, three if'n ya count git'n up an' warsh'n dishes. Bed time last night, only one foot had swell'n. This morn'n, they both look normal. "Damn, I need a toenail clip'n".

Before I tell ya how beautiful it is outside this morn'n, let me tell ya....I like to froze slap to death last night. Ya see, as the weather warmed up in south Texas, I stowed my winter blanket. All I had on was a skinny little girlie blanket. Accord'n to my Walmart special temp thingy, it got down to 42 degs last night...was down to 51 when I finally went to bed last night. That folks is winter all over again.

Ok, today I am gonna attempt to do some "jeep" stuff. Move the "bubba boat" an' all my fish'n gear from the "that jeep" an' put it in the "billy jeep". Bet ya a dollar that the battery is dead in the "that jeep". Damn I hate "that jeep".

Ok, my mind just gave out. Nuttin more to write. Laters....

 

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Got to pack up.....hit the road

Holy crap......what we gonna talk bout today?

I was sit'n there yesterday afternoon watch'n my dad gum feet swell up again. Yesterday morn'n they was in pretty good shape. Counted a total of ten toes. Speak'n of toes, I beat the hell out one this morn'n. Slamed that sucker up against a cabinet....OUCH!!!!.....an' a few choice words. I can say choice words ya know, I'm over 70 an' when you're over 70, you can do an' say anything ya want. An' I do on rare occasions.

Well, as far as I know, I still have them damn cat puppies up under "da house". I tried a Google search an' that didn't help none. I'm need'n to get some stuff done so I can go down the road a piece, but I ain't gonna do it till them cats are safe in another location. Dad gum cats.

I'm think'n I can have "Sally da house" an' the "billy jeep" ready to roll in bout a couple days....if'n I get off'n my lazy ass an' do something (I'm over 70, I can say that). The radiator leak in the Jeep can wait since I'll be towing it. I'm willing to take the chance on that battery control center circuit board. I ain't got a whole lot that needs done. Well, actually I do. I got to decide what to leave behind. Like the "billy bike an' the "bubba boat". I ain't rode the "billy bike" but two times since I been back in Sinton an' what makes me think I'll ride it in Georgia? Think'n I'll just give it to Frank an' forget bout damn bicycles. Unless it has a motor on it.

Then there's the "bubba boat". I've had plenty opportunity to put it in the water right here, but it sits in the back of that POS "that jeep" do'n nuttin. Now that I think bout it, the "bubba boat" will visit Georgia. After all the $$$$$$ I spend on that sucker, it's gonna get wet.
Just in case ya ain't never see a picture of my "bubba boat". That's the same one I burned a couple holes in an' almost sinked 'cause of a dad gum fish what got snagged on my fish'n pole. Inks Lake, 20011.

Have ya ever done everything ya ever wanted to do? I have. Shoot, there ain't a whole lot I want to do no more. I'm talk'n bout dreams an' goals in your life....not stuff like fish'n an' golf'n. There's still a lot of places I would like to see, or maybe go back an' visit, but they ain't all that important to me no more. In fact, there's a lot of work involved. An' I don't like work. Nor snow. "So what the hell ya gonna do Billy Bob"? Hell, I don't know. *sit'n here think'n bout that*

What my departure date may be....I have no idea. Was hope'n I would be on the road by the 15th....of last month, but that's questionable. I still got to do my taxes. Now where the hell did I put all the paperwork? I need gas an' propane, warsh the winders, put stuff up so's it don't fall on the floor.....my god, I got lots to do. And I got to make another trip to Port Aransas. And Walmart to refill prescriptions....a few groceries, stuff like that. Sheesh, I ain't never gonna get out of here.

Ok, that's my Sunday. I'll see each an' every one of you tomorrow. Hopefully with some good news.




Saturday, April 5, 2014

A front???

Oh no, God have mercy, Billy Bob has done got that feel'n again. Golf ball swak'n.....YES!!!!

Ok, so ya don't want to hear bout no golf ball swak'n again. Well, I'm sorry to say, but I'm gonna talk a bit bout golf ball swak'n. It's not really what particular interest ya want to talk bout.....you know, fish'n, hunt'n camp'n, shoot'n guns, shop'n at Walmart...even golf ball swak'n....stuff like that, ya just got to talk bout it. Ya get all excitis when ya think bout things ya like to do. I get all excitis when I think bout swak'n that damn golf ball. Even if'n the damn thing don't go where I'm aim'n. That's really bout all I wanted to say....I'm excitis. An' I got me some brand spank'n new golf'n balls. Look out Barney!!!

I'm think'n I mentioned that the "billy jeep" has a radiator leak....somewheres. Well, I went look'n for it yesterday. That meant I had to climb up under that thing....not once, but bout 4 or 7 times. Where the lower radiator hose connects to this doohicky an' it bolts up to the water pump thingy, there was a wet spot. A little green spot....to match the color of the antifreeze mixture. This is also where the engine thermostat is located. Sooo....sometime in the next few days, the old Billy Bob will be up under "billy jeep" replacing the thermostat an' repair'n that tiny leak. God I hate lay'n on the ground.

Then later, I went look'n for them damn cats under "da house". Nope, I didn't find no damn cats. But I did lay on the ground a few more times up under there. Damn my back hurts.

While I was lay'n under "da house", I decided I would put a couple screws in a 2x6 I had installed a week ago. The 2x6 was slid under the sewer line to raise it up so's I can hook up the drain line easier. The screws are to keep the 2x6 from fall'n to the pavement when I'm go'n a hunnert mile a hour down the road. If'n I wrote that correctly, you should have a clear picture of this repair.

Yesterday the wind blowed pretty darn good for a while. Bout mid afternoon it slowed down somewhat....to a south Texas slight breeze of bout 15 mile a hour. In Deming NM., a slight breeze is 25 mile a hour. But anyhows.....today sucks outside. Ain't even 70 degs yet. An' guess what? Them people that live up north are shovel'n big ol' piles of snow. Can ya believe that? Ain't no way in hell I would live up north.
Holy crap....... And people are leav'n the south to go back to that stuff...????

How many days do I have left before I have to file my income tax stuff??? Income tax sucks. Especially when over 45% of America don't have to pay taxes. My taxes support them people. Buy 'em beer an' wine, cigarettes an' chew bakki, Coka Cola an' Pepsi,.....you know what I'm talk'n bout. I say Grrrrrrrrr.




 


Friday, April 4, 2014

Swelled feet again

Well folks, here it is another day....or should I say another week burned up? Today is Friday just in case you didn't know. I didn't.

All them high winds an' stuff we was supposed to have yesterday, didn't show up until bout 4am this morn'n. An' yes it blowed in like a storm. This morn'n we have a sky full of sunshine, a nice warm day.....an' hunnert mile a hour winds out of the north. Bout 25mph I would say. I can live with that.

I'm gonna take a minute to talk bout blogs this morn'n. Does anybody remember a few years back....before blogs? We had chat rooms we could go to an' express our every day lives. Then along came forums...there's still a few of them around. Chat rooms an' forums are bout all gone now. Then blogs took over. But.....in the last year or so, even blogs are on the decline. Some blogs I read (red not reed) every day are no longer updated. Some not in over a year. Blog followers have also taken a huge decline. So where have all these people gone??? No, I ain't talk'n bout MY blog. I understand why MY blog is on a decline, but it's the other blogs I'm talk'n bout, the ones I used to read (reed....not red).

Ok, we done with that.

Yesterday morn'n I got up an' the first thing I do is check my feet. Remember they was swolled up the night before? Well they looked Ok....swell'n was gone. But then, bout 6 or 7pm last night they was all swolled up again. This morn'n, they almost Ok again with just a little swell'n in the left foot. This has happen in the past an' in a couple days I was just fine. *think'n, what the hell did I eat this time*
Well, the only thing I can think of, the other afternoon (Wednesday after my trip to Walmart), I took me two aspirin (500mg) an' a couple hours later I took me a couple Advil liqui-gels....my back was hurt'n something terrible. My back quit hurt'n, but a little later was when I notice the swell'n of my feet. That's the only thing I can think of. Why they swelled up last night, I don't know.

Some of the comments yesterday kind of sorta got me a little bit excited bout the upcoming Ga. trip. My mind goes haywire when I sit here think'n all by myself....nobody to talk to. I get myself all grouchy an' piss off an' end up say'n stuff on the blog. I know, I shouldn't be say'n every thing that comes to my mind when I'm sit'n here think'n an' feel'n sorry for myself. But it sure does help to get it out of my system.

No new news bout them damn cats up under "da house". All I know is "they got to go" before I go. Would hate to be go'n down the road an' some State cop pull me over for litter'n the highways with cat puppies. There's got to be a way to get that mama cat to move her kittens.




Thursday, April 3, 2014

Dumpster diving....."the dumps"

Ok, now what ya wanna do? I tried everthing I know an' it still ain't work'n.

Yesterdays Walmart trip was not a good trip. Nuttin happened funny, so don't git all excitis. In the first 10 minutes, I was fine. Then things changed....I had to find a sit down somewheres. Not onest, but three times before I got out of there. Then at "da house" I had to carry all that stuff I bought inside.

Then....last night I was sit'n here. I says "why my feet feel funny"? I look down....I got really big swolled up feet. What the hell???

Ok, on to something else. Although, aches an' pains, are the 'the' thing now days. That's what "old folks" talk bout ya know.

I was read'n on the blogs, a lot of people are headed back north. I rekon it's cause they don't like the summer heat in the south. Apparently they don't like the winter cold of the north neither 'cause they flock to the south in the winter. I'm think'n that has something to do with be'n retired an' do'n whatever ya want to. That's the way I look at it anyhows.

Even myself, I think of different places to go in the winter an' in the summer....look'n for comfortable weather where I'm not freez'n slap to death or sweat'n like a stuffed hog. I've yet to find the ideal spots for that. Well, I've found a few, but they either too expensive or they ain't got what I like to do. You know, fish'n an' golf'n, just to mention the most important two. It's either one or the other an' in some cases....neither. This limits my winter an' summer travels. Of course, I would never go somewheres where I didn't have a internet signal.....or a Walmart within 25 miles.

One of the best winter spots I found to winter camp is right here in south Texas in the Corpus Christi areas. Winters are usually, notice I said usually, very short an' not very cold. There is year round salt water fish'n an' short distances to fresh water lakes. An' year round golf ball swak'n if'n ya like golf ball swak'n. Dang, I sound like the local Chamber of Commerce....I'm done with that.

Again, talk'n bout my trip to Georgia. I'm just not at all excitis bout it. There's a possibility I may not go. But then lately, I ain't been excitis bout nuttin.....so maybe I will go, excitis or not. Think'n that may be another drawback of the old "git'n old" syndrome. I sit here at my computer, an' over there on the couch, think'n bout all the places I would like to visit an' all the things I would like to do....an' that's bout as far as it goes. Just think'n an' no do'n.

Ok, this post ain't go'n nowhere. See ya laters.....  

 

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

The one that got away

Husband an' wife, both draw a social security disability (he is she ain't) check in the same amount of $XXX a month. That's TWO checks of that amount, not one. On top of that, they receive another $XXX in State funded assistance. That's more than I make every month an' I worked from age 14 to 60 year old for mine. Remember when I was a roofer at 14 year old? An I'm not one of the 40 some percent that DON'T pay income tax. I pay my share. I don't know....it just irks me off.

Boy howdy, yesterdays Port Aransas trip turn out to be a bust. By the time I got to the island an' picked up my mail an' some smokes, I was in no condition to go on with the planned activities. An' I had me some pretty good ones too. The most important an' most excit'n was a shop'n stop at Walmart. I whizzed by Walmart do'n a hunnert mile a hour on the way back to "da house". Maybe this afternoon.

I was cast'n my lure across the creek next to a big ol' boulder. When I was reel'n that little "rooster tail" in, a great big ol' native rainbow trout come up, strike my bait, make a jump an' he was....poooof, gone just like that. Now I ain't never catched no fresh water trout anywheres near that big, but I thought that was the day. On an' off in a split second. Ok, where are the pictures? They gone....cain't find 'em nowhere on this computer.
Oh wait....there they are.


Ok, back to them cats. Somebody suggested I contact animal control to get 'em out. Now if'n I cain't get to them cats through that little hole, animal control ain't gonna get through it neither. My only alternative is to wait them out....entice 'em with some good eat'em ups. Sadie Mae, she ain't no help neither. She sit under "da house" just wait'n for them cats to come out. If'n I was a cat, I wouldn't come out with a damn dog wait'n on me to show myself.