Monday, February 23, 2015

Call 911, Alice is hurt

I'm gonna rekon this morn'n that adventure an' excitement comes in many shapes an' forms. Why I 'member a time many many years ago I climb my first mountain. We was outside play'n "ride that hoss", "skin that bear"....kid stuff. "Let's climb that mountain cliff Billy Bob". Ain't nuttin excit'n bout climb'n no mountain....unless something happens. It ain't no adventure unless you are dressed for the occasion. Mountain clothes. Moccasins. Coonshin cap....stuff like that. It was just another daily activity climb'n that cliff. Something like climb'n trees, throw'n rocks....pester'n the cats....kritter hunt'n. Stuff ya do every day.
Adventure an' excitement hit the instant I reach my hand over this small ledge to get me a good hand hold on the side that cliff. I been bited by a dad gum great big ol' cactus thingy lay'n on that ledge. My fingers are all stuck to that cactus thingy an' ain't no way they gonna ever come back apart. I got me a mountain cliff to git back off'n of....one handed.
I learn me a few more cuss'n words that day.

Ok......so this ain't the adventure an' excitement yer talk'n bout. It was a adventure to ME. An' if'n someone else was writ'n this, I would git myself all excitis read'n bout it.

I was paint'n round them winders with a Sharpie permanent marker. It sliped...I got black Sharpie on my new paint job. Now how the hell do ya get Sharpie off'n a paint job? Alcohol, ya use alcohol. Very careful, with a cue tip, I apply a dab of alcohol an' start to scrub that Sharpie mark. Damn, more Sharpie appears on the paint job. Then some more. It's mask an' touch up paint time. The paint don't match. Maybe nobody will ever see it. I'm done. Screw up #1 for the day.

     Can ya see it???

Screw up #2.....
A while later, I'm prepar'n my supper. This dad gum office chair is in my way. I give it a little shove. Alice is sit'n on the hobby table. The office chair runs slap into the hobby table....Alice is on the floor. She's cry'n...."I broke my leg". Carefully pick'n Alice up off'n the floor, I examine her for damage. Oh my god, she done broke her back. The back end cap has come slap loose. Little wood splinters stick'n out. I calls 911...."Alice broke her back". Amblamce shows up an' take Alice to the hospital for immediate surgery. That's why there ain't no pictures of her broke back. All left side winders will be masked off an' a brand spank'n new paint job on that side is in order. Grrrrrrr....all 'cause of a dad gum nervous Sharpie pen slip.

Boy howdy let me tell ya bout supper. Pan fried pork chop, fried taters, warmed over buttered corn an' some the best white gravy ya ever eat. Even Sadie Mae thought it was delicious. Now maybe my eyes will straighten up an' start work'n right an' just maybe, these dad gum nerves will calm down an' not slip with a Sharpie. I'm a very nervous person ya know. Ha....you should watch me try to thread a needle. By the time I git it threaded, I done forget what I was gonna sew.

It's cold again today (42 degs right now). More expected come Thursday. I'm think'n I'll just stay inside "da house" an' deal with it the best I can.

It was suggested in the comments yesterday that "why don't ya build a model of the Formosa sailboat ya lived on"? This idea has been on my mind for quite a few years. Now where on earth would I put a 41 foot sailboat in a 35 foot motorhome? I'm run'n slap out of room. Poor airplane is stowed in a compartment under "Sally da house". But....I know I ain't gonna build no helicopter 'cause of the expense of repairs after a crash. You crash helicopters ya know, not fly 'em. But there is a possibility I would build a sailboat. It would HAVE to be built remote control, just in case I ever get close to water again. Talk'n fresh water here. Ya don't put boats in salt water.

Ok, I got to meet up with the paint shop guy here in a bit. We work'n on a motorhome, not a freak'n sailboat.

Have ya ever took pain relievers an' ya got immune to 'em? These Advils ain't do'n their thing no more. I'm back to aspirins, an' they ain't do'n their thing neither. Dad gum bulldozers!!!

I'm gone....have ya a nice day.


  1. Poor Alice, looks like the emergency crew got there in time! Get her back all fixed by the professional body shop there, and that paintin guy make her brand new again.

  2. Yes, poor, poor Alice. Oh she will recover with your help, of course. That sailing ship is mighty impressive. Don't you wish you were on the sea again?

  3. You just *crack me up* describing the Alice fiasco..... (OK, I know it is NOT a laughing matter. Excuse me while I turn and laugh over my shoulder).
    Oh my gosh..... That sailboat is incredible. I'm gonna have to look up past blog posts to see if you wrote more about your sailin' life. Wow.
    OK, and a request: How bout some Sadie Mae pictures? Like with her partial harket? (hair cut).
    Jool in N. Texas

  4. What an interesting life you lead.... past, present... and future!

  5. Sorry about Alice there is no doubt in my mind Dr Billy Bob will have right in no time.
    .When I was young many moons ago I lived in trees just couldn't
    stay out of them. We were in CA when I was about 10 years old and we came across this group of people were living under these huge trees.
    They had all the furniture you would need even a stove under there..
    I was raised in a car until I was about 11 years old .I saw a lot of people living in all kinds of places.
    Also your body can get so use to the meds you take everyday sometimes they stop working.
    I have a device that uses led lights and it really reaches deep pain. I use it for my hips and lower back .Love that sailboat.

  6. Oh poor Alice.. you will have her ship shape in no time!

    KarenInTheWoods and Steveio
    (Blog) RVing: The USA Is Our Big Backyard